Remembering my mum

I just want to talk a bit about my mum. It's the second anniversary of her passing today and I want to mark it somehow. Just bought a little plant in a Xmas mouse pot for her,I always get her something for Xmas even though she isn't here. I still feel she can see it.

I still find it so hard to believe she has gone. How can someone just disappear? I realise now what a rock she was to me and that can never be replaced. Yes she was quite a difficult person sometimes,she was firm in her beliefs and nothing would change that. She came from a tough London upbringing,my grandad was an alcoholic and my mum and her two brothers had a tough upbringing with their parents arguing constantly and her dad drunk and spending all their money. She never really understood my love of dogs and could be quite horrid sometimes about it. However she was a generous woman and would never see me or my sister go without. She loved football passionately Spurs in particular. I've never met a woman so in love with football as much as her. She always dressed beautifully,was always colour coordinated,she had wardrobes full of clothes. She loved my dad very much and he loved her, my dad died ten years ago and she never got over it. I do hope I find a love like that one day. She was always there for me when my marriages broke up,when I went through post natal depression. She could be very tactless at times and quite hurtful but she was my mum and I loved her no matter what. I know she loved me,her family were her world.

I just want to people to know who she was,that she was alive and she is still alive in me and her grand children and my dad too. I've come to terms and accepted loosing my dad but its so much harder loosing my mum and realising I'm on my own. It's a big thing to get your head around.

10 Replies

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  • Thankyou for sharing your Mum with us today. She sounds like a wonderful woman.

    You're still grieving for her. Be kind to yourself. I'll light a candle in Church for her.

    Losing close family is always hard but around Christmas time it always seems so much worse.

    I lost my only sibling suddenly in Nov 2010 & buried her 2 days before Christmas......

    Jane

  • sending you much love and hugs teddysmum. I lost my Mum 6 years ago on 29th December. This time of year hits me hard so I know how you must be feeling.

    It's lovely that you shared your memories of your Mum with us all today and yes, I agree, losing a Mum is a very hard thing to get your head around.

    We're programmed to turn to our Mum's when we need them - especially when we feel poorly and as we feel poorly most days I think it makes it harder for us to accept we can't turn to Mum anymore.

    You take care and keep your Mum's memory alive by talking about her when ever you can.

    love and (((hugs)))

    Akasha xx

  • All I can do is send warm hugs x

  • I can relate to you teddysmum, I lost my mum 3 years ago. Although she suffered and I wouldn't want her back to go through it all again. I still find it hard that she isn't here for me to visit and share all the things we share with our mums. I do talk to her when I am alone, as I think she is still somehow connected to me. I sense her around me and smell her lovely perfume smell. It is her birthday coming up in two weeks, I have got some red balloons and ribbon and I will let them go to mark the day.My mum could be hard too, but like yours mine went through some bad times. I loved her dearly and she was the only person I could tell her anything without judgement. I hope I can be all those things for my daughters who I treasure beyond words. Your Mum sounded a lovely person and was blessed with a lovely daughter, for that she will always be close to you in spirit if not in body. Bless you x

  • hi teddysmum your Mum is still there in your heart and in your thoughts, i often ask my late Dads advice and can hear what he would say. its odd the things that remind me of him. I think oh that would be nice for him for his birthday or xmas then it dawns that he is no longer here.

    he has left us as a close family who are always around to support each other and our Mum.

    warm hugs xx

  • Such a lovely write up for your mum I to miss my mum so much they are the cloth that holds us together x

  • Hi I totally get it, I lost my mum a year past may and my dad five years before that. I truly believe that part of me died with them both, I am really feeling it coming into this festive season even more so than I did last year. The feeling of not belonging is huge, feeling lost and alone even although I have a son and husband, my sister is away on extended hols and I don't see my brother any more. Sending you a hug, I to have my dog and don't know what I would do without her unconditional love and cuddles. Take care thinking of you x

  • I lost my mum 10 years ago, my husband 6 years ago and my dad a year ago. At times I thought I would never climb out of that deep, deep hole. But gradually I did, slowly. My mum was my best friend and I still miss her every day. That feeling never goes away. I know what you all mean about things your mum did that were not as you would like them to be, but you always love them....not like them sometimes, but always love them. I became close to my dad when mum died, then when my hubby died dad and I became really close. When he died I felt so alone and bereft. I was an orphan and grieved terribly. But out of this loss came joy when my grandson was born in August this year. God has been soooo good to me sending little Rhys to lighten up my life again. Yes, we grieve, will never forget our loved ones but we do come out the other side, a little scarred, but with strength and fortitude. XXXX

  • Hello TM, thanks you so much for sharing your lovely message with us all. Your love shone through for your Mum and for your Dad too, lovely to read! xx

    I lost my hero Dad almost four years ago, there isn't a day that goes by when I don't think of him and miss his wisdom, he seemed to know everything about everything, how to solve everything, how to put my World to rights. My Mum and his children meant everything to him. I feel he is still with me protecting me, I am sure I can sense him near me. I love that thought.

    I still have my dear Mum, she is a breath of fresh air and I treasure every moment with her knowing that these moments are precious. She has coped marvellously without Dad. She will be with us all over Christmas and New Year which again will be precious moments too.

    Our loved ones are always with us, they're forever in our hearts. :)

    (((hug))) xxx

    Libs

  • The loveliest thing you could do was to share with us as I feel sure those we love watch over us all the time xxxxx

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