i spend my life apologising. feel need to apologise here before i start. at least i know you guys wont hold it against me. it just gets too much. my gp gave me steroid injection last week, hoping to make things a bit easier.
I'm lucky to live in council bungalow, i love it here. since april 2014, trying to organise installing central heating. what with 1 thing and another still trying. my problem now is, lots of people have been working out where to put me, cant be here whilst it's done, wont bore you with details but down to health again of course. Now that I have somewhere to go, sometime after 9th March, i dont think i can do it. next winter I would regret that of course. Tomorrow I have to give the go ahead. Or not. I'm sure i would live to regret saying no, or regret saying yes. and i would feel so guilty if i said no at this stage after all the work people have done to try to help.
Next, the tricky thing. Family. down to me. i work so hard telling them just how 'fine' i am, then get so miffed when it appears they believe me. the thoughts in my head, things i do want to say but again, i would live to regret, VERY much.
i dont think that steroid injection did anything at all. i'm fed up and angry that i cannot live the life i want, cannot be the person i should be, and there isn't a pill or medicine to change that.
i get these feelings from time to time, and i know from past experience this will pass, even though it doesn't feel like it right now. Tulip x