Will I feel like this always ? :(

Hi waiting diagnosis , very weak at the moment, but wanted to know if you feel like this daily or is it just when you have a bad flare up, if you've done too much you end bad or do you have normal days where you can eg decorate and feel ok , it's just I'm a doer, I have a 3,4 and 16 yr old and I dnt know if I can cope with this is it forever feeling like this !!!

12 Replies

  • Hi,

    Can't remember a 'feeling totally well' day, but certainly fluctuating degrees. Certainly know if I'm overdone as massive effect.

    Pacing is important but doesn't always work & its so frustrating!

    Must be really tough with little children xx

  • Thanks for your reply, it's quite upsetting as I carried them to bed or one in from the car If they fell asleep ,bathing and dressing them wrecks my back it's very sad how our lives change, sorry these thoughts just hit me today as I come across things thanks for listening.

  • Pacing far from easy with young children and finding some medication that eases the symptoms should see more of the better days than the bad.

    The way of keeping on with doing the best for the children is listen to your own body when struggling slow down or stop, nobody gives of their best when struggling. Look after yourself so you can look after the children, again easier said than done making adjustments and accepting any help that can be had.

  • Hi GiiG

    I am so sorry to read that you are not feeling too good at this time, and genuinely hope that you can find some resolution and relief to these issues. I must admit that I cannot remember the last time I had a whole day where I felt well? I have periods throughout the day whereby I can function and do what I do, but it does not last unfortunately.

    I want to wish you all the best of luck and I genuinely hope that you can get a diagnosis one way or the other soon.

    All my hopes and dreams for you


  • No you won't always feel like this, but some times and some days feel completely normal and even good.

    Just be wise where you spend these times your 3,4 and 16 deserve you best times not the dishes or the garden.

  • So sorry to hear your struggle - but the more you do (which is inevitable when you have a home and youngsters), and also the more emotionally drained you get the more pain/exhausted you can get. There is no one answer at the moment and for everyone's sake, now it's becoming more recognised by the profession - perhaps with more research funding being directed towards it, some help can be achieved. In the meantime tho' if there are any chores that can be delegated, even if the children don't do them as you would, tap in to their help. An amount of responsibilty is good for growth - I think it used to be called "When you finish your chores" lol x

  • Thankyou everyone for your wise and helpful words , you do make me feel better x

  • We all have these kind of days, or

    sometimes months but it does

    eventually get better at least

    for me. You feel like you just

    want to give up! But don't hang

    in there it will ease up! X

  • Hi my heart goes out to you, depression can be a big part of fibro and of course there's the depression we can get from everyday living, so we can end up with what I call double-depression. What I'm trying to say is that you could be heading for this if you don't already feel like it now! I tried therapy but I felt that although she might understand the everyday living depression there was no way she could understand fibro depression you've got to live that, so I cancelled the therapy. Then I joined this site and it so helps me, I really hope that you find some help you so deserve it take care xx

  • Yes. Loss can lead to deep depression. But yes, you can beat it.

    I have bad and good days like so many of us. And similarly, if I do too many things like cooking and cleaning and washing the dog (and I am stubbornly prone to acting as if there were nothing to stop me from my previous level of activity . . . ouchies) I am always sorry for it later. Never learn it seems. I get a severely sore back, neck, shoulders, and hips, and my arms, hands, and wrists get weak due to carpal tunnel syndrome as a result, and the doctors keep stalling me when I ask for more pain relief. I have to lie down and stretch my back out and it takes a long time to feel better even with pain meds.

    As others have said, try to pace yourself. If you get tired, sore, and cranky, you may get impatient with your kids who need you to be a good, calm role model, and it would be sad if you started losing your patience or temper with them and trying to make them "behave" without understanding what's up. You would be really sorry for that. If you are depressed, get some counseling and meds for that and don't let any "stigma" for mental imbalance stop you. I don't. People don't often see our invisible illness nor that of mental problem. (unless those are out of control which so many are not but are no less painful)

    Hugs to you and hang in there!

  • I have good days. I work part time and have to rest on my first day off otherwise i get totally fatigued and it ruins everything. I am my own worst enemy, but I am gradually learning.

  • Thankyou everyone for your help , it's really good being able to open up to understanding and kind people x

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