...another friend pregnant 😫

[7AVA]

...just after my last post a friend messaged me to tell me she's pregnant 😫 - so hard - why does it seem to be so easy for other people? 😓 Sorry to vent, I just started my buserelin injections for a second cycle with a FET and I'm not feeling very positive about it. She has only been with her boyfriend for about 8 months. I know it's not her fault but I'm so frustrated with this!!!

[Jonesjp]

Aw Hun it's awful isn't it, it just seems never ending! I'm due for a girly night next Friday and I'm dreading it, all bar one are either pregnant or have children. I get so frustrated, these are my friends I should want to see them, but I've ran out of excuses and am going to have to make this one! Just remember it's ok to be upset about this and in a few days it won't be so upsetting as we just accept it's just another friend to add to the list of mums or mums to be! Fingers crossed it's your turn next hunny x x x

[7AVA in reply to Jonesjp]

Thank you Philipsjp - it helps to know it's not just me who finds this hard. I hope your girly night goes ok. I was supposed to be meeting up with this friend but I think I'll make some excuses for now xx

[Jonesjp in reply to 7AVA]

Until your ready Hun there's no point your self through it ❤️X X X

[7AVA in reply to Jonesjp]

Thank you and thank you for your support xxx

[abcgirl in reply to 7AVA]

You're not the only one. I find it soooo hard too. Especially when they go on about their babies/children and complaining. I feel so left out it - hasn't been enjoyable getting together with friends.

[Rainbow_86]

It can be really hard hearing pregnancy announcements. Especially during treatment. It seems like it adds even more pressure and unfairness on the whole thing. Thinking of you..... and sending hugs xx

[7AVA in reply to Rainbow_86]

Yes, as if the drug injections aren't enough! Hope your 2ww isn't dragging too much. Very best of luck xxx

[Kyell2]

Aw, it's just rubbish isn't it. Seems everyone is getting pregnant at the moment or maybe we just notice it more right now.

It's just so easy for some people to get pregnant that it annoys me very irrationally 😂 You feel free to vent as much as you want!

[7AVA in reply to Kyell2]

Thank you - it just gets to me when it's a close friend and she's not even been with her partner that long!! 😤

[E_05]

So sorry to read this, it always seems to be the way that the night your trying to keep positive about treatment someone lands you will hard news. You can do this though, keep strong xx

[7AVA in reply to E_05]

Thanks E_05, I was already finding it really difficult to feel positive about this cycle. I don't know why - think I better try some IVF hypnotherapy like I tell everyone else to do! But for tonight, I'm just going to go and buy myself some chocolate 🍫🍫🍫 xxx

[E_05 in reply to 7AVA]

Sounds like a good plan - chocolate helps everything 😋xx

[_MrsC]

Oh Hun. I am sorry. It is not fair. Feel your disappointment. It's natural. No one will judge you here as we've all been there too. xxx

[7AVA in reply to _MrsC]

Thanks so much MrsC - it makes such a difference having people who understand on here xxx

[Laura_beth]

We've all been there. Personally it feels like there's been a massive baby boom and everyone is having babies! 😔

What makes it worse is all the "nudge nudge" you're next comments from people who dont know the situation we're all in 😣

Mother nature is a B. But hopefully it will be you next 🙏🏼 try not to stress too much about other people. And feel free to vent away here, at least that way you can be happy for your friend xx

[7AVA in reply to Laura_beth]

Thanks Laura_beth, I feel really lucky to have found this forum - trying my best to be happy for my friend but like you, there's been a baby boom around us. She's the fourth friend who has told me she's pregnant in about the same number of months. It's natural I guess, just hard to deal with. Good luck to you, wherever you are with your journey xxx

[Hidden]

totally normal to feel this way...xxx we've all been there..

[7AVA in reply to Hidden]

Thank you loveeggs xxx

[sharpy87]

I completely understand! It's pretty soul destroying.

I'm dealing with my sister getting pregnant her first month trying while we plough through ivf #2! 😩 life is unfair!

But its not easy for a lot of people so your not alone! X

[7AVA in reply to sharpy87]

Thanks Sharpy , sorry you're having to deal with that and you're right plenty of evidence on here of people who don't have it easy - we're in this together. Best of luck xxx

[AllWeNeedIsluv]

Bless ya hun. Its real crap isn't it. Vent out here all you need too Try to keep positive this time hopefully will be your time. Wish you all the best hun. It will happen 🤗😘

[7AVA in reply to AllWeNeedIsluv]

Thanks Allweneedisluv xxx

[sunshineyellow]

I completely agree. I've cut myself off from everyone as I can't bear to hear people complain about the tiredness of pregnancy / talk about their kids / see them with kids / be asked about when we're having children / risk another pregnancy announcement.

I know it's not healthy, but it's the only way I can deal with thing right now. Without this forum and you wonderful strong ladies, I don't know where I'd be.

You're not alone in all this. Sending you lots of hugs xxx

[7AVA in reply to sunshineyellow]

I'm the same sunshineyellow - it's the only way I can deal with it too. Thank you for your support xxx

[Penders]

It is so difficult when you hear of friends good news, so many thoughts go through your mind you can drive yourself crazy! Last year 8 of my friends announced their pregnancy news all at the same time 😔 I didn't take it well and I stayed away until I was able to deal with it. Again this year my new sister in law announced her news and I felt awful. Try to not let the "why them why not you" get you down. Meet your friends when you feel ready, I'm sure they will understand when your ready to explain why you have been distant. Keep your head high. Wishing you all the luck in the world ❤️❤️

[7AVA in reply to Penders]

Thank you Penders. 8 friends at once is just so hard. I too have to stay away and yes, I'm driving myself crazy with the 'why them not me'! Unfortunately there are no answers to that question. I'm afraid I'm just honest with them and tell them it's just too painful to meet up. I hope they understand and eventually I'll come through this and be able to reconnect with them. Wishing you so much luck with your embryos xxx

[Penders in reply to 7AVA]

Thanks 7AVA and yes you will come through this and you will be stronger because of it. Good luck with your journey xxx

[7AVA in reply to Penders]

Hope so Penders. Good luck to you too xxx

[Janop79]

It's good to hear that I'm not the only one feeling like this. Just found out that one of my friends in one of my friendship group is pregnant. There are four of us in this group and the other two also have children. Not only do I have fertility problems but I'm also single. Tried so hard to be happy for her which I am but I'm also so sad. Not sure why I've been so unlucky with both. We've arranged a date to meet up in Oct but I know now that I won't be able to go. It'll hurt too much and not only will I feel left out but I'll also feel like a failure. Hoping to start my cycle at the end of the week but struggling to remain positive like we're always told to be

[7AVA in reply to Janop79]

Oh Janop, I'm sorry to hear this. Although I'm with someone now, I spent a long time single and watching friends fall pregnant around me. I absolutely admire your courage and strength to do ivf when you are single and only wish I'd had this resolve when I was younger. As someone who has wanted a child for years but felt unable to try on my own, I now find myself at 41, with a lovely boyfriend, struggling to conceive. As much as I love my partner, sometimes I wish I'd just gone ahead on my own. I feel sure you are doing the right thing and there's every chance you will have success. As for your friends, do they know what your plans are? If not, could you confide in them or at least in one or two of them? If they are good friends they should support you. I am routing for you and wish you every success, good luck xxx

[Janop79 in reply to 7AVA]

Sorry for not replying earlier. Was in a pretty bad way. Started my third cycle shortly afterwards which was tough. Struggled to keep positive. It didn't go as well as I had hoped so now struggling with that. Allowing myself the weekend to have my own pity party and then going to force myself to cheer up and think more positively about everything.

I really appreciate you coming back to me. You seem like a really special person and I hope that it all works out for you.

In response to your questions, my friends don't know how I feel...I feel a little mean and embarrassed feeling like this. I'm planning to meet up with one of them to explain (the pregnant one) but not sure I can face that. I'll probably end up cancelling.

Thanks again and good luck xxx

[7AVA in reply to Janop79]

I'm sorry to hear your cycle didn't go as well as you'd hoped. I've read your other posts though and I'm wishing you so much luck with your frozen embryo. I don't have any information about frozen 3 days but my very lively, healthy nephew came from a fresh 3 day transfer. I wish you every success. With regard to meeting up with your pregnant friend, I am no-one to talk as I avoid pregnant friends which is awful, I know but I'm just scared I will have a meltdown afterwards. However, if you've decided to do it then I'm sure you will cope and it may lead to her having a greater understanding of what you're going through. What I always tell myself is, 'you're stronger than you think'. I am so pleased to read in your other posts that you have the support of your mum and brothers. Wishing you future happiness with a little one, however they arrive xxx

[kelsbels88]

Oh Hun

It is definitively not just you

I had a lot of tears a couple of weeks ago just after AF arrived so I was emotional already a colleague at work announced her 12wk scan I wanted to fall into a hole.

I can't stand the comments "all I think is I want it to be me" I want to feel the sickness or have the backache etc

Sending you wishes and hugs and luck for this cycle xxxx

[jenny34]

Ah it's so difficult to hear others' pregnancy news; and it really feels like you cant get away from it. Life is cruel and unfair. I used to absolutely dread it; whilst I was going through it I think I counted 8 pregnancies/babies (and that was just close friends and family, nevermind others; at work for example). It's so bloody hard. Just remember ALL your feelings are valid and understandable. Sending love xxxxx