Feeling so bitter

[Bec-A]

I'm feeling so bitter towards my friends and family that have babies. There seems to be a baby boom going on at the moment, as soon as any of my friends get married, bam 2 months later they are announcing pregnancies 😞 When's it going to be my turn?? Why am I been punished and put through hell? I feel like I just can't be around them which is horrible I know. My husband is completely the opposite, anyone that gets pregnant he's so excited for them and so nice to them, not a bitter bone in his body which makes me fuming, and then more upset with myself that I can't be more like him 😞 It's a never ending cycle I feel so bitter towards those who have babies or are pregnant then I feel worse about myself for feeling like that. Any tips to be a nicer person to those who have what I desperately want? Xxx

[Bec-A]

I have he just thinks I'm selfish and tells me I should be happy for other people 😞 He's just not got a jealous bone in his body which is why I love him but sometimes it feels like he's not that bothered about it happening for us, he's more bothered about everyone else having babies

[Hope_4_2017x in reply to Bec-A]

I had this exact problem with my hubby.. unfortunately men will never understand the strong maternal feelings we get coupled with hormones and then to top it off having to go through this process! Sending you hugs xx

[Krushby89]

No tips I'm afraid but don't feel bad, your not a horrible person and your definitely not alone in these feelings x sending hugs x

[kelsbels88]

Hi Bec-A

Please don't feel guilty you are definitely not the only one and this is a common thing. I'm afraid I don't have any tips, I'm a year down my journey and I'm still finding it difficult to deal with others who are pregnant.

You are not the only one who has these feelings I have them all the time, constantly wondering why it's not my turn too.

Try and keep your chin up sending love of hugs and baby dust xxx

[NsKaz]

Hi Hun, oh I wish there was something I could say to take the hurt away. Everything that you are thinking and feeling is completely normal. Our situation is so hard and makes you feel emotions that you don't normally experience (namely jealousy, anger, bitterness, even hate!) don't beat yourself up for feeling this way and know that these feeling do pass. Feel them, soothe them if you can, then let them go. It doesn't make you a bad person for feeling that way.

I've done it all over the last 2 years including avoiding and pushing people away. (At my lowest point on clomid 7 of my friends told me they were pregnant in 2 weeks!) but honestly for me, the best thing I did was open up to them. Once I did they understood when I was being a bit funny or distant. They didn't expect me to be the life and soul of the party and were understanding if I wasn't up to (the many) baby showers.

Be kind to yourself. If you feel up to seeing your pregnant friends 1:1 then do it, but if you're not in a good place give yourself a pass. My husband was like yours - he just couldn't understand these feelings and was always so happy for others. I think that men just react differently, plus it's not their bodies that are broody / going through hormone treatment etc. Have you thought about counselling? I know it doesn't work for everyone but sometimes talking it through to someone who is removed from the situation and doesn't judge helps.

Always here - message me if you want to rant / chat.

Sending love, hope and baby dust xxx

[Bec-A]

Thanks all I think I'm just gutted that I can't talk to the one person who is going through the same thing as me- my husband because he is able to take it a lot more in his stride 😞I wish I was more like him xxx

[7AVA]

It is hard. My boyfriend was supportive but didn't really understand until this year when two of his closest friends and two close work colleagues announced their wives were pregnant. He says he gets it a more now. I'm sorry you're going through this xxx

[Hidden]

Hi Bec-A I can totally relate to how your feeling as i have felt exactly the same for the past few years but i have learnt to cope with my feelings a lot better as the months go on. Don't get me wrong I still have my down days where i'm like when is it gonna be my turn and I hate my body so much etc but i have started following this blog which has a few interesting articles that have helped me to cope and understand my feelings and that it's okay to feel like that. I too am surrounded by mates at the minute who are popping babies out left right and centre and sometimes it feels so unfair. I have attached the address for the blog below which is worth a look at. Its hard but I just think when it is our turn to have our babies we will be stronger people at the end of it all. I'm here if you ever want a good old rant.

Baby dust to you!

embracefertility.co.uk/hand...

[London7]

This whole horrible process is hard enough without beating yourself up on top of it. You can't help how you feel, and how you are feeling is totally normal! I rushed out of a friend's big lunch a couple of months ago after another friend there made a surprise pregnancy announcement (and was telling everyone how they fell pregnant the first month of trying, how unprepared they were, and how easy it was to fall pregnant ...!). I felt awful about that. But it's hard and you can't control your emotions. One thing I found did help that i read somewhere was telling yourself: I don't want their baby, I want my baby. And it's so true. Oh - and my husband is the same. They just don't go through what we go through - at least that's what I tell myself about my husband and the reason why he just doesn't fully "get it". xx

[Leesara]

Bitterness is a tough pill to swallow but I sure know how that feels and despite wanting to be hoot for others, it's hard, when going through a tough struggling. journey. I would say, be kind and lovely to yourself and I wish you luck and happiness in your jouney

[Hidden]

im sure you are happy for them really just sad for yourself.