Newbie, feeling so low

[kathgibson22]

Hi everyone i never post on these forums but always read everyone's posts and either smile or cry with you all. Dont really know where to start . Me and husband have been ttc for a few years now im 37 and he's 44. problems with sides i have very low AMH of 2.8 only 3 follicles on one side and zero on other st last baseline scan , Husband has low sperm . We started fertility treatment last March and were told we would need ICSI . We were so lucky to get pregnant naturally last September which ended in miscarriage at 6 weeks. since then my cycles have been mostly 19 days . We are due to start our first IVF cycle on this month ( if my vit d levels can increase enough!). I'm terrified, not for the IVF itself really ( although its all abit overwhelming )but for the outcome if it doesn't work . Im a very negative thinker so of course it won't work ! And im scared to feel worse than i already do. Ive tried everything to try and magically make a difference, various supplements , diet, accupuncture, fertility tea etc but nothing seems to work. My friends / sisters try and help but they just say isnt it exciting youre starting IVF or that they dont know what to say! but im not excited at all as i know theres so many hurdles to jump through first that we may not even get to the transfer ( Also hard to swallow as they all conceived so easily and naturally) just feel so unbelievably low today was hoping some tiny miracle would happen on this last cycle ( im about 8 DPO but know theres nothing happening ) even if there was I've probably cried it away ! So sorry for the ranting but im wishing everybody who is struggling all the luck and magic baby dust i can. X

[LCharlton]

Hang in there! Wishing you so much luck xx

[kathgibson22 in reply to LCharlton]

Thank you lovely xx

[Countrymouse56]

Hello 👋🏻I could have written your post 15 months ago. I had an AMH of 2.3 and only three follicles. OH had lots of sperm problems due to a vasectomy/reversal. I was so overwhelmed by the whole situation, I cried for weeks. It was definitely the lowest time in my life. Anyway I managed to keep battling. The idea of IVF scared the hell out of me. We had ICSI and our first round was successful. My little boy is nearly 5 months old. It is a horrible thing to go through but just take it one step at a time. Wishing you the best of luck 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻xx

[kathgibson22 in reply to Countrymouse56]

Hi lovely, thank you for your reply it gives me a glimmer of hope! Xxx

[Mutleybob in reply to Countrymouse56]

This gives me lots of hope, so thank you. I’ve just started my first round of IVF, on day 3 of Buserelin injections. I found out I have low AMH (between 2-3) My main concern is I won’t produce enough eggs. If I get past this first stage, then I hope I have as good a chance as anyone as I have been pregnant 6 times before and have 2 children so was quite shocked that I had fertility issues. But guess things decline with age. This is very likely my only chance as we can’t afford any more rounds, we are doing ICSI.

[Purplecat1984]

Sending you love and luck xx I am in a similar position but hanging on in there by taking hope from some of the success stories from ladies in similar situations on here. I know it’s a cliche but it does only take one. This is a great place to come when you’re feeling low, everyone is so lovely. Thinking of you and everything crossed for you xx

[kathgibson22 in reply to Purplecat1984]

Thanks lovely...keeping everything crossed for you too! Xxx

[LisaHarada]

Hello my lovely, I have been and still am in the same situation. I went through 2 rounds of IVF, both failed and was extremely depressed both rounds. Like you, I am now doing lifestyle changes - organic food, banned all plastics, fertility tea, lots of vitamins, while working up the courage to go for a 3rd round. It is not easy, but you summoning up the courage to go for the first round already shows your strength and your determination to do this. Everyone feels down and beaten up, it is absolutely normal so don't blame yourself for it. I wish you all the best and hope this works out. A big hug...

[kathgibson22 in reply to LisaHarada]

Thank you lovely, wishing you all the luck in the world too xxx

[Nickon]

I would hug you if I could! Want to support you, dear! Be strong and fight. Don't be afraid, everything will be okay. Your AMH is no to so low as you think. We have found our Dr with the help of my hubby's mom friend. She had amh lower than 1 and they managed to conceive after the 2nd ICSI attempt. So, as far as you can see, miracles happen!

[kathgibson22 in reply to Nickon]

I would love a hug right now! Sat here crying again as temp dropped last night so period on way ...again! Wish i wouldnt cling onto hope of that one tiny hope that this month will be THE month. As we all probably feel..why is it never my turn?!. Just hope that i can be one of the miracle success stories. Thank you for your lovely reply. I will always keep fighting just with numerous crying meltdowns in the middle! Xx

[Nickon]

I will always be keeping my fingers crossed for you, hun! You can write to me any time

[kathgibson22 in reply to Nickon]

Thank you lovely xx