Just needed a whine

[LHow81]

It's not too long now hopefully till we start the whole process properly. But it just seems people around me are falling pregnant at the drop of a hat. Feeling very down, just wanted a whine.

[willow-tree]

Look after yourself! That's the best advice I could give. And don't beat yourself up about feeling down or feeling it's not fair when everyone else gets pregnant. It isn't! And it's really really hard.But I had to get to a point where I just avoided or protected myself a bit from it and felt that I was allowed to do that to keep sane! Advice and threads on here and others do help as they tend to understand and have similar feelings that make you realise it's ok to feel that way. .... Not sure if that's much help but just wanted to emphasise with you really. Wishing you lots of luck for your treatment and take care xxx

[Mooster1]

Hey Hun know how you feel. I'm still waiting for the IVF process to begin & my friend just informed me she's having twins. I'm like being pregnant with one would be nice enough for me! Everywhere you look there's pregnant women! It's hard Hun but stay strong. That's what I keep telling myself! Xx

[LHow81]

It's all we can do I guess just seem to be failing. Feeling very low crying all the time. Need some support. Just not sure how to cope right now.

[Hidden]

Lhow81, i have been on the nhs waiting lisy for over a year and finally i will b able to start treatment after my april period, so i am in the same boat with u aswel, u can help feeling down, especialy u see ladies around u fall pregant without an effort. but keep ur spirits high and be positive.

[MrsMarsh]

Yep I totally agree... Believe me you are definatly not on your own!! My friend (of 24 years) is due her 5th baby next month and I have totally pushed myself away from her.. "It was an accident and really didnt want this baby" When she told me, She was upset to tell me, but I put on the brave face and said dont worry my time will come, but inside I wanted to lash out!!

I had a very wide circle of friends but over the passed 6 months I have just cut myself off from them as they simply do not know what I am going through and its just easier.

Im also struggling a bit at the moment with my Husbands 2 boys that we have every other night and every other weekend, I just want it to be me and my husband and the mo but I know thats not possible. We are a step further now to becoming Mums and that is what you have to hold onto. Be postive. Its dragging I know but think of each little step further.

Im looking forward to tomorrow, the passed 3 weeks has dragged, but its another step further and when I collect my medication and get "my timetable" its that next step.

Chin up love, and we are all with you every step of the way x x x

[LHow81 in reply to MrsMarsh]

You can understand them being upset but to tell you like that is so insensitive. I know what you mean about wanting to just shut away the rest of the world. I couldn't face work today I feel bad for calling in sick it's just dealing with the general public in a shop with general public all of which seem to be having or coming in with babies is just not in me right now. I got my meds the other day should be starting them Thursday but currently waiting for my period to start which is an odd feeling being happy to come on! Hope it all goes well for you tomorrow. So glad I've got this place not sure how I'd be with out it.

[Belle-7-]

Yes same here everyone at my work is having babies. All I hear from them is "oh I'm tired" "this bump is to big" " I feel so fat " "when are you going to have a kid" like I can just purchased one. It sounds really bad because I've not told anybody at work about my situation this is so nosy and if I told one person everyone would know and I don't want anyone knowing my business so really I can't moan but I do have to have a whine now and then I'm only human. I'm waiting for IVF not sure how long I have to wait just had my blood done with my boyfriend . We been diagnosed with unexplained infertility . We've been trying to 4yrs . Where are you from ? I'm from brum was wondering what the waiting time is Ivf where you're from its about 18 months here Take care Hun we all know as we are all in this together.

[LHow81]

I can understand not wanting to tell people. If I could've I'd probably have never told the people at work. But I needed time off as I had to have a operation to remove my Fallopian tubes. I live in Norfolk. We've had to wait sometime but that was mostly to find out why and the operation also had to lose weight. We started the whole process march 2012. And I should finally be starting the medications this Thursday. Good luck with everything x

[MrsMarsh]

Everyone here at works knows, Im quite open with it all really but noone seems to understand what is REALLY involved!!

Norfolk... Where abouts? My Dad was from Kings Lynn and My Mum lives near Great Yarmouth..

Just gone to help out fitting a windscreen today and the lady was on the mobile whilst I was waiting for her to do me a Cheque, she comes off and says sorry about that my sister in law has just had a baby!!! See EVERY BLOODY WHERE!!!!

[LHow81 in reply to MrsMarsh]

Small world isn't it. I'm in Kings Lynn too. No, no one does they're good at work to an extent but they can't understand just how depressing it is. You just can't get away!

[MrsMarsh]

So are you doing your treatment at the QE? I lived in Kings Lynn for a few years, all my dads side of the family are still there.. My Cousin works in the Private hospital next to QE.

I assume that I will have to wait for my next period to come then before the injections start. I finish my Pill on Friday so it will probably be a few days after that.. x

[LHow81 in reply to MrsMarsh]

Yes at the QEH and Bourn in Cambridge. I finished my pill Friday just gone. Should be starting on today or tomorrow I hope as I really want to start the injections this week.

[MrsMarsh]

Well I have had my scan and an Endo Scratch everything fine now on Suprecur for 2 weeks starting today, I have to take the pill for another 4 days then apparantly I will expect a period. It seems like Im on a total different plan?

[LHow81]

It does indeed! So are suprecur the uppers or downers for want of a better phrase?? I've still not come on.. I think your 3D scan is a more expensive version of the AMH blood test I had but I think it's a more accurate test probably a perk of being private (there has to be more other than the speed) Hope the injections go well. I'm going to be bouncing around trying to kickstart my cycle!!!

[MrsMarsh]

The suprecur is to shut everything down for 2 weeks, hubby is giving me the first injection at 10.30pm :-s I had my AMH done through bloods a while ago, this scan was very in depth checked for fibroids cysts etc, amazing equipment looking at my ovaries womb etc, then they done the scratch which was a little painful but still ok.. I hope you come on soon Hun the waiting must be horrible... Have you always been regular?

[LHow81 in reply to MrsMarsh]

Ahh see I'm not doing the shutting down thing cause of my high FSH level. I was regular before it's the pill I guess making it slow. Frustrating waiting!!!! Hope the injection went ok!? My husband is way too squeamish to inject me lol. Luckily it doesn't bother me. X

[MrsMarsh]

You lucky thing just having the Up Meds, I'm on that for 2 weeks then on the up ones for another 2 weeks. The injection was fine, didnt even feel it, the needle is so tiny, my Husband done a really good job. I would do the injections myself but its just nice to get him involved with it too. It was a bit odd trying to work out timings as they have to be done around the same time, and we have so much going on the next 2 weeks with gigs and partys! Just trying to fill my diary so the time goes quicker!! x Hope you see red today!!

[LHow81]

Not too lucky I'm not doing the downs because my fsh was high so getting a good number of eggs is unlikely so concentrating on quality. Yeah good plan to keep busy :). Still no red!!! Glad it was ok the needles do look very fine x

[MrsMarsh]

Im trying to sound a bit positive (Maybe Lucky was he wrong word to use). You seem really down so was trying to put a light on things. Its good to have a few eggs that are good quality than loads and they are poor though.. As I have a lot of egg reserve (Maybe too many and might not be good quality) they are worried about OHSS so it might be a bit longer as the up drug is going to be a low dosage to start with. Still it does only need one good one!! It would be nice to get a few froze though just in case.. Hope your ok anyway, must be annoying just waiting to come on!! x x

[LHow81]

It's ok I know you didn't mean anything by it.. In some ways it has been good because I have missed two weeks and so the process has been faster. At some point I have to start taking the suprecur either as well as the other one or instead of to make sure I don't ovulate or something it's all so complicated! The good news is I have now started my period and so will be going for the scan and starting the injections tomorrow has perked me up a bit. Also another good old rant on here helped. Thanks MrsM you've been great to talk to and I hope everything continues well with the injections. Keep us updated. xx

[MrsMarsh]

Woo hoo all systems go good luck and keep us updated too, you will be going through it all before me x x