Really can't cope no more

I have had this blog for some time now but I normally just read everyone's blogs but today I just ha enough , I found out I had endo at 17 am now 34 I have had lots off operations which have helped but not for long , I found out at 19 I couldn't get pregnant which just crumbled my whole world I've been on pain killers for so long now if I shook myself I would rattle ... I've been on & off zoledex & hrt but finished the course in sept but today I took my 1st period & am in total pain I've been sitting here crying trying to ease the pain with hot water bottle as sometimes the heat helps with pain killers of course as am on tramadol & co-codamol they make me feel sick but what else can I do I've been going through this for so long now & have never really talked to anyone about it as family & friends don't really understand I don't think anyone does unless they suffer it too well hope you's don't mind me having a wee moan about myself I'm just in so much pain I just can't cope on my own anymore x

6 Replies

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  • It is completely understandable that you are at the end of your tether - you poor thing. And it has been going on for so long.... Completely understand about the sickness from the co-codamol. I have been on co-codomal and voltarol for just over a week now since my op and I have been so sick it's been unbearable - so can't imagine what you are going through. Have you tried changing your diet at all? I presume you will have done as it's been going on for years.

    I am in a lot of pain, and sometimes at a loss at what to do and even though my family and friends are brilliant, it's hard for them to understand. My poor boyfriend gets the brunt of it all.... finally now he realises it just isn't PMT, he is even more supportive... before he thought I was a crazy hormonal woman :-)

    I do hope you feel better and even if you want to chat and vent frustration, I am happy to listen to chat back :-) Take care....

  • *hugs* have you tried looking into CBT? Cognitive behavioural therapy? It won't make the pain go away but it will help you cope so you will have less days like these where everything seems black and hopeless and there's no point - I've been there, we all have.

    Firstly, go easy on yourself. The intense pain will ease either in a few hours or a day or two but for now just do what you can with the pills, hot water bottles, punching a pillow - anything. In a few days maybe talk to your GP about changing the tablets? Sounds like they are not as effective as they should be. You can drink peppermint or camomile tea for the sickness or maybe try Motillum tablets? I think ginger might help nausea too.

    *big hugs*

  • Thank you both for replying yea I've tried the diet I've tried everything I was feeling so low this morn when I wrote that am just glad I got it out off my system as I couldn't stop crying I guess am just so sick of the pain but once again thank you for answering me xx

  • Thought id write a wee up date it's now 1.52 am & am still in agony I've feel asleep a few times from this morn due to the tramadol painkillers but once they wore off that's it all over again . Doctors told me that after all these zoledex that I shouldn't be in pain anymore I think il be giving my gp a wee ring on mon morn , am getting pains like someone's stabbing me then it changes & it cramps as if something inside me is getting squeezed so so hard , maybe that might not make sense but its how I can describe some off the pains , am so tried & this is only day 1 off prob about 10 to 14 days off bleeding & constant pain & bez76 I hope your op you had works & your out off pain soon x

  • I really feel for you. I only found out in July that I had endo. Everything seems to be falling into place now as I have been ill for years, been to doctors and had scans but nothing showed up. I am now 37 and have had 3 miscarriages with no explanation or answers. July my period started and didn't stop for over 2 weeks, it was horrendous. Finally the dr sent me for an internal scan which she thought showed a cyst, my parents paid for me to go privately to have it removed thinking this was a one off op!! ... When my consultant operated she found I had a polyp in my womb (which had probably caused the miscarriages) a cyst on my left ovary and that I have severe endometriosis causing all my insides to be in a mess, my bowel, uterus, bladder and womb are all joined together, and now since my hysteroscopy making love is agony! ... I still want children and can't bring myself to think of my life without them, like you my world would crumble!! ... My husband and family are amazing but don't truly inderstand the emotional rollercoaster I am on.

    If you would like to talk anytime please message me, if nothing else we may be able to help each other!

    Big hugs.. Xx

  • Aw honey I am so sorry to hear that, thats awful and i send you hugs!!!! I think you should keep going back to you GP until you get some sort of relief this is just ridiculus! I know its hard but just keep doin things that make you feel good. Stick to the diet and try herbal remedies and possibly change your pain killers? I usually change my pain killers every few months when I find they no longer work. I know its so scary when the pain is so severe and it feels like it will never go away, and worst of all for me is that I never really have anyone that will even help me let alone feel any sort of sympathy!!

    I really hope you feel better soon and let us know how you get on.

    xxxx

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