Relationship help

[Xkatysx]

I am looking to see how other people's have been effected by endometriosis. I constantly have a null pain in my stomach some days can be worse. I take the pill and don't have a break now seems to keep at bay the agony we can be in.

When it comes to sex with my partner I don't even feel an erge. This may because it can hurt the pain is in my lower stomach. Also after I am still in pain. I kept this from my partner I never wanted him to feel put off by me. I have recently told him how I feel. It never went down well. I don't feel he understand how uncomfortable it can feel. We're breaking apart. I have considered getting a historectomy I am only 28 the doctor said I was too young. I don't know what to do anymore xx

[Hidden]

Hey, what a horrid situation for you. When I was first diagnosed my partner new something wasn’t right as I’d mentioned the same as you to him before (pain before and after, no libido etc) and I fully expected him to leave, in fact due to the strain on our physical relationship I told him to go because I didn’t feel it was fair on him. He surprised me by staying and I must admit I do feel lucky as 7 years later we’re still together but he found it helped to be with me at my appointments, I also explained in detail how it felt and he also read all the info leaflets, websites etc the drs gave me to better understand it. I don’t know if your partner may benefit and understand more if you educate him on the disease? My partner never really understood until he was educated on the disease. He was also in the room when the consultant showed me scans and pics etc of my endo and I think that really hit home for him. I don’t know if the above will help but I do hope you find some way through this tough time. Stay strong. 🎗🎗

[KM1986]

This is so sad to hear and I really feel for you. As already suggested, maybe he just doesn't understand how painful it can be. I'm lucky enough to be married to a wonderful man who's very understanding but it still causes strain. Other than non-penetrative sex, there's not really a magic answer to this, but it doesn't mean you can't still be close and have a physical connection. Sex for me generally writes me off for 3/4 days so although it's very sad to say, it's a chore to say the least. I do however take meds before and after to stop it writing me off completely.

You were right to be open with your partner - it's something he needs to know. You wouldn't date someone and hide arthritis from them - you would explain that you have a medical condition that makes certain things a little harder for you.

Explain to him that it's purely physical, and that it's no reflection on your feelings for him. He should respect that and try to help you through this difficult time. Sending hugs xx

[Xkatysx in reply to KM1986]

Thank you both. We all know how long it takes to be diegnosed he has been through it all with me. We have a daughter who is nearly 2 which was a shock. Then everything got put on hold again I was taken oramorth for the pain.

Iv told him I still care for him lately we hardly even cuddle of kiss then just fight about sex. It should be natural. He gets frustrated can say some horrible things to me like he's not attracted to me anymore should go find a stripper visit a sex club to fill his needs. He says that he does not mean it. Just pushes me away.

When do have intercourse the whole time my head is thinking about when the pain will start. Then the moment itself.

I will try get in with the doctor ask about these pills to take before I never knew about them. Thanks for the support. Nice knowing people can relate xx