Too many things going on. Need that mojo back... - Couch to 5K

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Too many things going on. Need that mojo back - and some luck (good preferably)

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate
29 Replies

Hi all.

Not posted for a while but thought it's about time I got things off my chest. I have - up until a few months ago - been doing 3 X 10k runs a week. Then, back in early December, my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. Since then, she has had a mastectomy and is undergoing chemo. Runs slowly dwindled to 1 - 2, 5 - 10k runs per week.

Then my wife decides that it's time to call time on our marriage (this not a complete shock - just the timing). Mojo slipping further!

Then, my mother has a major stroke, and gets diagnosed with leukemia, together with several other nasties and is currently residing in hospital.

Then, as if that wasn't enough, 2 of my best friends also diagnosed with cancer!

To top it all off, work has dried up somewhat (self employed)!

It seems that someone up top has got it in for me this year.

Back to running - or not as is the case. I haven't been out for 2 weeks now and my wife is now in hospital as reacting really badly to the chemo (we're staying together until the treatment is done) which has made it near impossible to get out. We have an 11 year old so can't leave her on her own.

The one good thing on the horizon is that my main client is paying for a trip to the Barcelona Grand Prix next week (should I be getting on a plane at a time like this?)

Anyways, sorry to be so depressing but just thought I would air things to you lovely people. I need to start running more regularly again as one of the many benefits is clearing the head and somehow putting things in perspective.

Keep running peeps.

J1

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Jonny1
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29 Replies
Ullyrunner profile image
UllyrunnerGraduate

Oh Jonny, I'm so sorry - such a lot to cope with all coming so close together. Cancer is really the pits isn't it 😕.

It sounds as if you are having to support a lot of people close to you at the moment, so it's really important that you find the strength to carry on. You are right that your running can help to keep you sane -perhaps you can sneak in a few shorter runs? Can you get your daughter out on her bike alongside you - it might help her too.

I hope the running can bring you some normality and solace. Is there someone you can lean on a bit? You men are not always great at talking about things or asking for help, but we all need a bit of support sometimes.

Sending a virtual hug in the meantime. x

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to Ullyrunner

Thanks Ullyrunner.

You are right of course. A few shorter runs is the answer. Getting my daughter out maybe a tad more difficult. I'm a positive sort of person though so will strive to keep things "real".

You are right also about men not talking - working on that one.

helcl profile image
helclGraduate

Words are completely inadequate- what a horrible time.

Running will help clear your head though. With regards to your 11 year old, can she not be left for a short while, if you found a route that loops past your house?

I really hope that things don't carry on as rotten as they are.

Keep posting though

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to helcl

Hi helcl.

My wife should be back within a couple of days so not too much of a problem.

The next luck has to be good!

jaynekate profile image
jaynekate

Phew, what a staggering pile of s**t you've stumbled in to. So sorry to read all this and I can only imagine how tough it all is for you Jonny1.

Life can be very cruel repeatedly chucking stuff at us when we're screaming "enough!"

It's no wonder you've lost your mojo. But like you say, running is good for clearing the head or at least just giving us a bit of distraction or focus.

Maybe your trip to Barcelona will recharge your batteries a bit and give you a bit of headspace.

I don't want to fill this post full of trite advice so just want to say keep putting one foot in front of the other and look after yourself and your daughter. And enjoy, if you can, Barcelona.

Jayne

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to jaynekate

Hi Jayne.

Thanks for the reply. I am really looking forward to the break. Hopefully a bit of battery recharge.

J

useitorloseit profile image
useitorloseitGraduate

Wow! I'm amazed you are even finding the strength to get out of bed in the morning, let alone run! I don't know what to say, except if running helps whatever is going through your head right now, keep on doing it.

The universe has thrown a fair amount of poop at me down the years, and the only pearls of wisdom I can give you is that when times are really really bad, it usually turns out that something brilliant is waiting for you around the corner. I used to poopoo my husband when we first got together some 25 years ago when he said things like that, but he has turned out to be right in this respect (though fortunately I am still right about everything else!!!).

Good luck, and I hope your coping strategies keep up with the many crises.

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to useitorloseit

Thanks usitorloseit.

I am also hoping that will be the case.

J

misswobble profile image
misswobbleGraduate

Oh what a complete pile of shite. I feel so sorry that you're going through so much, and all at once! No wonder you're feeling the pressure

We all need some escape. I flee to my plot when I need to be on my own. I also go for a run, which really helps defuzz my brain. Find time for yourself in all this! You won't be any good to anyone if you don't. You have to be in good fettle mentally and physically to support everyone else. You can't do that if you're not fit

Some stuff has to take a back seat. You have to sort the wheat from the chaff. Prioritise what's important and what can keep. Your trip sounds perfect and it's one thing that has happened with perfect timing for a change.

Enjoy yourself!!!!

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to misswobble

Hi misswobble.

I intend to. I love Barcelona as a city so really looking forward to it.

J

Dunder2004 profile image
Dunder2004Graduate

Can only repeat what has already been said. That's a lot of bad stuff to have on your plate at the same time.

Do your best to enjoy the Grand Prix, Montmelo is a lovely place but even if you are staying in the city, that's not a bad location to squeeze in a couple of nice runs.

All the best Jonny.

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to Dunder2004

Thanks Dunder.

I will be taking my running gear! I'll report back how it was.

Toonlou24 profile image
Toonlou24Graduate

Oh Jonny you poor thing. That's crap. I really don't know what to say to you. Try to just make a little bit of time for you. A few short runs here and there may really help you get rid of some stress and feel a weeny bit better. Hope things improve for you. Come on here and rant anytime! Always someone around to listen. Take care of you. Xx

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to Toonlou24

Hi Toonlou24.

I feel a bit guilty posting such a negative post in such a positive forum. The fact is though that everyone is so good here. Thanks for your comments.

J

Toonlou24 profile image
Toonlou24Graduate in reply to Jonny1

Don't worry yourself about that. Life throws crap at us all at times. It's lovely to be able support each other. Keep posting and talking to us!!! May help a little. Virtual hug!!

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to Toonlou24

Thanks for the virtual hug Toonlou. All the best.

J

drakeybar profile image
drakeybarGraduate

Just to let you know thinking about you at this sad time, I'm sure brighter things will be on the Horizon.

All the best.

From (DrakeyBar) John

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to drakeybar

Thanks John.

I really hope so.

J

mfamilias profile image
mfamiliasGraduate

Hi Jonny, and pleased to meet you.I'm sorry that you've got so much crap being flung your way. The only thing I can say is that when we went through a very unpleasant phase last year (also sparked off by the unwelcome visit of Mr C to a close member of the family), I learned that to take care of other people, you have to take time to take care of yourself, without feeling guilty about it. So take one day at a time, take care of yourself, and make sure you get out for those head-defuzzing runs. All the best.

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to mfamilias

Thanks for that mfamilias.

I'll heed your words. Mr C is an epidemic I feel. We have to somehow beat it.

J

Irishprincess profile image
IrishprincessGraduate

Jonny, I can't add anything to what the others have said. What an absolutely horrible time you've gone through but you sound strong.

I hope you are relying on friends at a time like this as they can be a huge help, both practically and emotionally. Just ask and I'm sure they'll be so pleased you did.

All I can say is keep running as it's an element of life that you have some control over and keep posting here.

You should definitely go to Barcelona. Enjoy and don't feel guilty.

I hope life gets a bit better for you. Take care. x

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to Irishprincess

Thanks Irishprincess.

Looking forward to Barcelona. I'll let everyone know how I get on.

J

poppypug profile image
poppypugGraduate

Oh Jonny, I am so sorry to hear what youre going through, things must be so tough for you right now xxxx

Just want to wish you happier times and yes I think you should definitely go to Barcelona, it will do you good to get away for a bit .

Hang on in there, I do so hope that happier times are just around the corner for you.

Look after yourself xxx

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to poppypug

Thanks Poppypug.

I hope your right. Things have to get better soon.

J

mrstickle profile image
mrstickle

Sorry to hear your current situ, maybe you could you run while your daughter is at school? Nice client, go Barcelona, enjoy the change of scene, recharge your batteries & we're here for the good & bad times :-)

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to mrstickle

Thanks Mrstickle.

I'll work it out somehow.

J

Coddfish profile image
CoddfishGraduate

Oh Johnny, what a horrible series of events. Wishing you, your wife, mother and friends all the best. Running is a good way of giving yourself some thinking space, but can imagine the real difficulty you must be having in finding the time and motivation to get out of the door. I hope things look up for you and that Barcelona is the start of better news.

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to Coddfish

Thanks Coldfield. Hopefully down hill sometime soon.

J

Jonny1 profile image
Jonny1Graduate in reply to Jonny1

Sorry coddfish.

Bloody predictive text.

J

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