Hopes of running the Swansea 10k are fading fast. :-(

[Honorsmum]

4 years ago, I was training for the Swansea 10k when I became very ill and was eventually diagnosed with Crohn's disease.

For anyone who may not know what Crohn's is, it's an auto-immune illness that causes inflammation and ulceration in the bowel. Symptoms include weight loss and exhaustion - because the body is unable to absorb nutrients from food - dehydration, loss of appetite, pain, diarrhoea, joint inflammation (it's a systemic disease that can cause inflammation throughout the body, not just the bowel).

When it first struck me, I lost half a stone in a weekend (which is a lot when you 're only 8 stone to begin with), and was in the bathroom up to 20 times a day with diarrhoea and blood. I was exhausted and had no idea what was wrong with me.

My G.P said it was stress and stuck me on antidepressants, but eventually referred me to a gastroenterologist "so that they can tell you that there's nothing wrong with you."

Finally, after possibly the worst 6 months of my life, a bowel biopsy showed that I was in fact ill - with the incurable condition, Crohn's.

A 4 month course of pretty fierce steroids got me back to a manageable state and a daily dose of anti-inflammatory does it's best to keep me there. I no longer talk about "normal", rather "what's normal for me" - which is still tiredness and 3 or 4 toilet trips daily with diarrhoea. I stopped running after a scan showed wear in my hip - possibly caused by the steroids, or maybe by the disease itself. I was told that a referral to a rheumatologist was pretty much inevitable with inflammatory bowel disease.

I started running again after joining a bunch of friends in an online fitness group. Someone posted a 30 day squat challenge and as the days went on, I started to get a yearning to get my running shoes on again. I started the c25k programme and quickly became hooked - the squats had strengthened my legs so I no longer suffered knee and hip problems.

The other girls in the online group are all runners and the subject of doing a race came up, so we decided to enter the Swansea 10k at the end of September.

I was nervous, I'll admit - it feels like my nemesis - but also keen to complete what I'd started 4 years ago. I've been running 3 or 4 times a week, building up my distance and putting in the time. In the last couple of weeks, it's been tough - even the shorter runs have felt like hard work and I've felt pretty exhausted on rest days. Gradually, my joints have started to niggle, I'm on the loo more, I'm starting to worry about every run and how it's going to make me feel...and last night, the dreaded blood made a reappearance.

I don't know what to do. I don't want to stop, after all the weeks of hard work I've put in. It would feel like failure all over again. But if I push on when the warning signs are there, I could make a bad situation worse and possibly scupper any chance of running again for a long time.

[Honorsmum]

Wow, that turned into a bit of a stream of consciousness!

Sorry!

[Oldgirl Graduate]

Crikey Honorsmum sending you a big virtual hug ( 0 ) you really have suffered and still are by the sound of things. You have 4 weeks until your race so why not relax the training a bit and reduce longer runs to 4K to give your body a chance to recover, you have been pushing it pretty hard by the sound of things. Get yourself checked out too, if nothing else to give you peace of mind. If you are OK you can always take some walking breaks during the 10K there is no hard and fast rules with these races that says you have to run every step.

I really wish you well and hope you manage to continue, you have come so far and done so well while suffering from what is a horrible condition. Stay positive and don't get stressed as I'm told that's bad for Crohn's sufferers. Thanks too for sharing and explaining what it is as I'm sure many don't know but you have clarified for us.

[scotsheather Graduate]

It's fantastic that you have come back to running after everything you've been through. I hope you manage to enter the race - just do it in your own way. I live in Swansea and hope to be cheering you on!!!

[Feefbev Graduate]

Wow, what an achievement to get back to running after everything you've been through!!! I echo what others say.........you've done amazingly......if you really want to conquer the 10k, do it, but listen to your body and take it easy, no shame in walking breaks..........also, it sounds like you're training hard as well.........listen to your body...take it easy and don't push yourself - keep us updated.......all the best xx

[Hidden]

I think you win the prize for the most tags generated by a post ever!

In all seriousness though, Crohn's disease sounds absolutely horrific, and if the little I know about it is true, you have perhaps played down the immense pain, fatigue, not to mention all the side effects from the steroids!

It's frustrating that something you enjoy (running) is being hampered by your medical condition. I guess you know your body best and it is a balance for you in terms of overall quality of life. Do you have any review appointments soon to ask a medical specialist for advice? Failing that, is there a health unlocked group for inflammatory bowel disease / Crohn's disease?

Good luck whatever your decision, you've achieved loads despite your condition and I applaud your candid description on this site of what is a very poorly understood and stigmatised disease. I hope you get some symptom relief soon!

[OldNed Graduate]

This is probably understatement of the year but that doesn't sound like much fun. You've actually done really well (sorry, didn't mean that to sound like Young Mr Grace). Oldgirl's advice sounds good though. Ease back now, chill through the first half of September, build up a bit in the third week but still short of the distance and rely on adrenaline & walking breaks to see you through on the day. It'd be a shame to not do something on the day but I completely agree that you don't want to make it worse by doing too much. We'll still be rooting for you whatever you decide.

[Honorsmum]

Gosh. I'm a bit overwhelmed by your lovely replies - thank you!

I was worried my post was a bit graphic, but you 're right, Old girl and Newbierunner - people generally have no idea what Crohn's is, or they think it's like IBS and all the toilet humour jokes come out.

It IS a largely invisible disease - you couldn't tell I have it by looking (except maybe by my slimness) and it can be hard to explain that it's more than a bit of a dodgy tummy. My body is attacking itself all the time and that's pretty tiring, even on a good day.

I am very lucky - I have a specialist nurse I can ring for help at any time, so I will have a chat with her and see what she suggests. My consultant does triathlons to raise money for Crohn's and Ulcerative colitis charities, so he's very understanding too.

I had an easier day yesterday, so headed out for a "slow" run last night. My left shin and calf felt very tight at the beginning but seemed to ease as the run went on. However, when it came to walking the cool down, I realised I could only limp heavily on it - adrenaline must have numbed the pain while I was on the move. I made sure I stretched properly and iced it, so it's not quite so bad today but I've decided I need to see a podiatrist to sort it out (it's the foot I think I roll out on).

Mapped my run on Runkeeper and discovered it was my fastest yet - I cracked the 9 minute mile average speed

Thank you SO much for your lovely, supportive words - they really gave me a lift yesterday when I needed it.

Tracey.xxx