Late bereavement and feeling very depressed and anxious

Lost my husband 4 years ago, I thought i had got through it, as he was very ill with COPD, I couldn't see stand to see him suffer anymore... 20 months ago, I realized, I hadn't grieved, and was starting to miss him badly, so I asked for counseling, in the meantime had a knee op, took Tramadol, which left me with anxiety, as I stopped abruptly... Still waiting for the counseling, which took 9 months, the doctors put me on antidepressants, which made me worse, don't think it went with my thyroxine.... I was on different ones on and off, until 2 weeks ago, did ween off them, but don't think, I ever had time to withdraw off all the others, that didn't work for me, just deadened my thoughts of Geoff my late husband, now I think I have double whammy, withdrawal and the bereavement .... I am in a terrible state crying and full of anxiety, all day long... do a volunteer job, but i am not me anymore, and it takes a lot out of me.... My kids worry about me, and just want their mum back. I live alone with my little 17 year old dog, and i am scared of loosing him as well.... Was not like this 20 months ago, all I wanted was counseling, did manage to get on with it then, just very sad...AD's have made me loose a lot of weight and insomnia ...... Does anyone know where you can get group bereavement counseling.... I live in St Helens Merseyside UK, near by, as they don't seem to have anything here at all.... So desperate to get help, as tablets aren't the answer, just keeps delaying it.... Please can anyone help me with any of this.... Many thanks Hilary

9 Replies

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  • Hello Hilary so very sorry for your loss of your husband I can totally understand why you are feeling the way you do your still grieving.I lost me mum 10 years ago and I still grieve and cry and in February this year I lost my step dad to copd too and that was awful. I think when we lose someone so close who we have loved unconditional for so many years it takes half of you with them you are never the same again.you try to be happy but you get stopped in your tracks again. Just do what you are doing and take it day by day baby steps?

    Have you tried cruze bereavement support

    I'm looking for the same group bereavement therapy I'm not having much luck either.

    Here if you need a chat

    Love NAT xx

  • Hi NAT, thank you so much for your reply.... yes tried Cruise, the nearest one is Birkenhead, which is about 16 miles away, and yes I could easily get there, but I am out of the area..... Might be in some luck with Whiston Hospital, they have a group coming up, but because again I am out of the area, I will have to fund myself, but that's okay..... Sad there's nothing here....Will keep in touch and let you know.... Love Hilary xx

  • Hilaary I am so sorry you are feeling this level of grief....I think that you call your CHC counsil or agency to help you.....I am from the US and only know what I hear on another post....good luck

    AVB

  • Thanks for your reply.... Wish I lived in the US... love Hilary xx

  • Hi Hilary are you familiar with the millennium center in Merseyside? They do group bereavement there's also

    St Helens Bereavement Service, based at Tontine House (WA10 1BD) provides a confidential individual befriending service to offer emotional and social support to people (aged 18+) who have recently suffered as a result of bereavement

    Have you tried this you probably already have hope you get some luck soon honey.

    Love NAT xx

  • Sorry me again hahaha

    Chrysalis Centre for Change run a Bereavement Support Group (every Monday between 10am and 12pm), led by a volunteer Counsellor, to support women struggling from bereavement of any kind. No appointment is necessary and you can access the group as and when you need to.

    St John's Church (Earlestown, WA12 9BS) run a support group called 'Lynk-Up' for those who have lost someone close to them and may be feeling lonely or unable to cope. The group takes place between 2pm and 4pm on the third Thursday of every month in a relaxed environment.

  • Hi NAt thanks for that, will look into St Johns Church, but the Chrysalis Centre, told me the other week they did not do bereavement, as I saw it myself on the internet, I will also try them again, just in case something has changed.... thanks so much... Hilary :)

  • Hope it helps you Hilary xxx

  • Thanks NAT,,,x

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