haven't been talking for a while. i have been feeling bad yesterday my bereavement one to one has finished. two weeks ago. I am a little better but i still get very tearful still. i am having bad bouts of depression. but iam going to go on the depression site but i will still keep in touch because i think my depression might be linked in some way to the losses i have experienced. i am still crying in the middle of the night and in the day. and people don't understand that my depression will never go away the doctor said that in other words i am stuck with this for the rest of my life. i know iam on the wrong site. i will pop back and forth to chat.
Love
Stafford (Staff)
xxx
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STAFFORD
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5 Replies
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Hello Staff
Thank you for your post Staff. Although your one to one bereavement counselling has finished I hope you found it helpful. Try not to be hard on yourself when you cry Staff, I like to see it as a positive expression of our emotion(s). It sounds like your emotions are close to the surface right now and in time you will learn to release your emotions in the safety of people who do understand. Unfortunately Staff not everyone can or is willing to understand or support you for their own reasons. You will learn who you can trust with your emotions/feelings and where. Try to see your tears as a positive for you, it is ok to cry, give yourself permission to cry, In time you will find you get upset less often. Remember to take your time and try to be kind to yourself Staff.
Have you ever tried to write your feelings down Staff? Some people find it helpful to express themselves in this way.
You are always welcome in this forum whenever you wish and we will do our best to support and help you, take care.
Thank you for being there for me i know the depression is not going to go away because the Doctor says he has done everything for me. i know i am looking at the negative side but i don't feel i have any positives there is a lot a can't cope with i can't cope with people crying like children i hate crowds i get tried easy i hate noisy places like banging doors and people shouting over each other like when i go to mind i have to leave because of the noise of people shouting over each other and they bang the door it gets too much for me and i get depressed and i feel like crying and i go home.
i don't enjoy anything i stay at home i find it hard to associate with people.
Thank you for your reply. Life is very hard and can be negative when you feel so depressed. Looking back over your posts do you know when your depression started and the reason for your depression? If you feel that your depression is due to bereavement then you may need further bereavement counselling.
Staff, what may be useful for you is to look at what you can do, what you like/enjoy doing, what you would like to do when you are feeling more positive. I know it is very hard to look at positives at the moment, I have been there, please try to think of just one positive then write it down.
For example, you may choose to write 'I got up this morning' this is positive. If for example you wrote 'I did not get up this morning' this would be negative. Are you able to see the difference and how positive the first example is and sounds?'
Stafford the only way is through and you can make a start by learning how to help yourself. In small steps. One to one counselling can support you to explore and put into practice how you can help yourself.
By contacting HU you are helping yourself. A therapist can help you further with this. You have been brave enough to come on to this forum. How about arranging to see your GP for further counselling help and showing your GP the relevant posts.
Let me know how you get on Staff, take care.
Lottie
Hello Staff
It's Lottie again. I hear that you say you believe your depression will never go away. But how do you know that Staff? Very few people know what will happen in the distant future.
If your depression will never go away then perhaps it would be helpful to not look that far ahead and learn to concentrate on now. Bring things back to today and take one day at a time.
Would it be helpful to you to perhaps write down three things that you have enjoyed each day. This may help to begin to focus your mind on more positive things and identify things you enjoy. Over time you can then choose to do more things you enjoy each day. As you enjoy more things life may become more positive and you will feel more positive. One day at a time Staff.
You say you have bad bouts of depression. Do you feel that you would benefit from further counselling support for bereavement/depresssion at the moment? Or it may be something to consider at a later date.
Your depression is very likely linked to the bereavements you have been through but you may have depression anyway. The way to find out is, if you had depression before the bereavement, in which case the depression worsened following bereavement. If this is the case Staff, your Doctor will treat the underlying depression.
How do you know it will never go away Staff? are you thinking negatively?
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Will it ever be the same? 
Lost me dad.
Need advice 
