I was once 10 years old, I was always worried that I would give the wrong answer,be laughed at,be socially unacceptable.
I was quiet,never asked for help.
One day I woke up and my stomach was in knots and my heart was leaping in my chest like I had just ran a particularly hard sack race.
I was sad all the time and didn't want to go to school or leave the house at all,I used to scream and cry in the mornings, some days I got my way, others I had to leave my safe place and go to school.
With screaming,happy, "normal" children.
Most days I came home.
At night in bed I couldnt breathe, sometimes if I was really bad in public I would faint.
The doctors didn't know what was wrong,my parents were at their wits end,I was told I was anaemic.
When your 10 you can't tell people what is wrong and they start to resent you think your seeking attention when it goes on and on for years.
When I was 13 it wasn't so bad, I rarely had panic attacks I was under control, I must have been attention seeking,I thought,I really was making it up.
Now im 27,fully grown and this nameless thing is claiming me again
Making a hostage of my emotions and esteem.
Turns out, when your 27, you still can't tell people what's wrong.
They still can't understand, but they can stick you on a tablet and hopefully you will be so tired you won't have time to worry and your heart will stay in your chest.