hi i gave up a job i loved but now im having panic attacks because i miss it and they wont have me back help .

[loulou66]

[Hidden]

Hi. loulou66. It is difficult to know how to respond with so little information. I know you are upset and it may be difficult for you to write but please try. Did you give up your job because of panic attacks or are you having them because of your situation. Hope to hear from you. Best wishes. jonathan.

[BriarRose]

Hi Loulou

I think you need to ask yourself some questions, like:-

You loved the job, but you gave it up. Why? Was it because of anxiety/stress/panic or the like? If so, the panic attacks could simply be a continuation of that - possibly made worse by the fact that, if you're unemployed, you have more time to brood over it.

Think about what it was you "loved" about the job. The work? Your colleagues? The social interaction? The sense of achievement? Is there any way you can get whatever it is you are missing in some other way? Social interaction - can you find a support group/activity group in your area to give you some of what you would get from a job? A sense of achievement? What about voluntary work? Many voluntary groups are very understanding about MH issues - the CAB for one - and doing something like that would both give you something to get out of bed for and give you a sense of achievement.

Also, don't forget, it is very easy to throw a "golden veil" over the past. When we're feeling particularly low/vulnerable/anxious, it is easy - in my experience - to "revisit" decisions - like Why did i do that? How could i have been so stupid? I wish I'd never left!! And so forth! Believe me, I've been there, done that, got the T-shirt (it didn't suit me!) The way i have learnt to cope with what I think might have been mistakes I've made in the past is to think "I did what seemed best at the time, the way I felt then, with the information I had. it was the right decision then, and i refuse to dwell on it." It does help!

Keep posting, love, it's not the only job in the entire universe for you! The main thing is to get well. I'm not making light of being unemployed - I've been there and it's hell on wheels, so be gentle with yourself. But - do NOT think that "if only" you could get your old job back, all would be well. There's more to Life and health than that.

Love and all the best

Rose xxxx

[loulou66 in reply to BriarRose]

Thankyou so much for what you wrote ,I have never thought of things it that way before,you have really made me think

thankyou

loulou xxx

[BriarRose in reply to loulou66]

You're welcome, hun, I've been round the block a few times - picked up a few tips along the way, mainly from getting it wrong the first (second? third?) time round lol

Take care, keep posting, and good luck!

Love

Rose

xxxx

[loulou66 in reply to BriarRose]

any tips you could give me .you have made me look at things in a different way and i thank you for that .i know got to change the way i think.good talking to you

loulou

[BriarRose in reply to loulou66]

Hi Loulou

happy to help if I can - I think John's relaxation technique would really help with the panic attacks - I'm going to try it lol! It would help if you could let me have a bit more info about your job - what was it, why you "loved" it, and why, in that case, you left it? You can PM me if you don't want to put too much on here, and I'll do my best. Can't promise any "magic bullets" - I'm just another sufferer fighting my way as best i can, like everyone else on here - but if i can help, I'm happy to.

Love

Rose

xxxx

[loulou66 in reply to BriarRose]

i was a centre clerk and dealt with over 45 drivers when they came back from delivering, i like the atmosphere and how i got on with them ,i needed a full time job cause hubby wants to retire as i was only parttime and thought going back to old job was good idea well it hasnt turned out that way worst idea ive ever had ,miss job i left ,liked the people i worked with and miss someone i was getting close to , thought i was good at my job but hubby keep going on and on

[BriarRose in reply to loulou66]

Oh, hun, that's a really tough one, because it wasn't really your "choice" to leave - you just felt you had to!!! You don't say how old your husband is - has he taken early retirement? If so, i would have thought a fairer solution would be for you BOTH to have part-time jobs, rather than you doing a full-time job you hate so hubby can retire! You say your previous job - the one you liked - won't take you back - have you really tried? I know some firms have a blanket policy of not re-hiring staff who have left, but maybe if you explained your reasons?

However - you need a PLAN, just in case you do need to keep working full-time. I would suggest you get a peice of paper, and write down the "good" and the "bad" things about each of the two jobs - like getting on with colleagues (previous job) would be "good" - part-time might be "bad". In your current job, full-time might be "good" - what is it you find "bad"? Also, how long have you been in the "new" job - some places take longer to get accepted in than others, and it might well get better as people get to know you/you get to know them.

However, to get back to the "list" - it will give you an idea of what you want from a job. Having got that sorted, maybe give yourself a time limit - say, six months - to find a job that meets AS MANY of the "good" things as possible - no job is going to meet all of them, and if anyone ever tells you they've never wanted to murder their boss/colleague - they're lying Then, you can sort out your CV to "angle" it towards the sort of job you'ld like. (If you want any help with your CV, PM me, I've written hundreds lol )

One you have your plan, and a goal - to get a better job in, say six months, you can start your "campaign". Look around at similar firms to the one you liked - are they recruiting? Even if they're not, send them your CV and ask them to keep it on file in case something suitable comes up. It's not easy in today's climate, but it WILL give you a sense of purpose, and you can tell yourself that you're present job is NOT forever!!!

Also, is there anything you can do in your present job to make it better? The best way i can explain this is by a personal example. Years ago, in my 20s, I got a job with the Probation Service as a secretary/audio-typist (BC - Before Computers lol!) The other two secretaries were much older than I, and i just sat for the first day, typing reams from a dictaphone, and thought I would go mad from boredom!!! I HATED it - I thought "I can't stand it!!!!" One of the other secretaries sat by the reception window where the probation clients came in, and was always complaining because it was furthest from the window and the light was bad. Bingo! I offered to change places with her, asked for another desk lamp, and so ended up manning the reception desk, where I met the clients. Yes, they were thieves and toe-rags and the like, but they were fun - and I treated them with respect, whereas the two other secretaries looked down their noses at them The clients ended up really liking me, chatting away about their problems, and I liked a lot f them - they were only kids, most of them, and had had a pretty rough background! In fact, one of them actually said to me once "Why are the other ladies so rude to me?" Just a simple thing like moving desks transformed my job from something that would have had me carried out screaming into something I really enjoyed! That's only an example, but sometimes a small thing can make a huge difference!

Hope this helps, hun, but if I can help any further, do let me know.

Good luck, lots of love

Rose xxxx

[john80614]

im in exactly same boat except i hated my job with a passion lol

[john80614]

Mantra is a Sanskrit word often translated as ‘something to lean the mind upon’.

A mantra is a tool for cultivating awareness and reflection, and is one of the most common meditation techniques (along with breath meditation) used around the world today.

In mantra meditation the object of our focus (or our anchor) is a short word, phrase or sound - repeated over and over - aloud or silently in the mind. As you repeat the mantra your mind fixes on the sound and vibration, your body relaxes and your breathing slows. In time there is a sense of the breath weaving itself into the rhythm of the mantra (like a seductive song) .. and this gentle repetition stills and centres us, until eventually the mantra stops and we rest in stillness.

When we use a mantra that holds a meaning, when the words repeated have significance, then our mantra can influence our mind state, leading us away from the subconscious negative mind chatter fuelling our feelings of stress, to a sense of calmness and ease that we associate with the word ‘re-lax’.

“As we think, so we become” (Buddha).

"RE-LAX" MANTRA MEDITATION

* Find a place to sit comfortably and begin by spending a few moments just watching your breath.

* Observe your breath moving in its own natural rhythm, not trying to change or control your breath in any way. Simply being aware of the inhalation and exhalation in this moment.

* Feel your body. Feel your breath. Let go of any tension or tightness you notice. Allow your focus to gently move inward.

* When you feel ready, begin to silently note the mantra "RE-LAX". As you breathe in .. “RE” .. and as you breathe out the second syllable "-LAX". Gently in time with your breath .. “RE..LAX” “RE..LAX”.

* If you become distracted simply notice that you have been distracted and when ready return to the next inhalation and the mantra "RE ..LAX".

Before finishing, sit a little longer with your eyes closed simply enjoying the stillness and silence cultivated in your meditation. When you move back into your day, allow that peace and calm move with you, silently noting the mantra throughout the day to reconnect and remind yourself of your intention to relax.

[celest]

i too quit my job that i loved, i thought that i would be there forever. my boss was making it really difficult for me. ive regretted it ever since. hence along came the axiety, after 12 years service, i never thought that i would be unemployed, and thats a hard cross to bear. the job market is dire and things have changed so much, you have to apply for most things online, grrr. what ever happened to meeting the actual person! i cant bring myself to go to the dole, ive heard so many horror stories and i dont want them to make me feel any worse than i already do. so i just feel anxious all the time ,because looking for work is a whole new thing for me, especially when i thought that i wou.ld be working in the same place forever. it not very nice to be ripped out of your comfort zone, and at the moment i cant seem to see a way out of it .

[loulou66]

hi celest ,i know where your coming from .i know what you mean about meeting the actual person wouldnt that be nice .i have found talking to certain people on here have really helped me and made me think about my life and what i can do now as cant change whats happened but can do something about future ,i m here if you need to talk and any help i can give i will

take care

loulou