New start...it's scary!

After working in a highly stressful environment that drove me to get help and CBT I have finally handed in my notice and taken on a new role elsewhere. I am excited and I know deep down it is the right choice to get out, but despite the fact I was approached for this role, over the last year I have lost my confidence in myself and worry I will be no good at my new job.

Its all or nothing now. I feel like it's almost like a test. If I can cope in my new role than it was my old job that made me feel to anxious, if I can't cope then I feel like I will have to resign myself to the fact I can't have a successful career!

Does anyone else feel like their ambitions and drive are slipping away from them due to fear and anxiety?

Thanks,

HB x

8 Replies

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  • Well done on taking the plunge for what is right for you and good luck for when you start I will have my fingers crossed for you.

    I know how you feel in regards to the thoughts of 'I cant have a sucessful career' i used to be a staff nurse and despite getting through all my training ect whilst battling depression/anxiety it all fell apart 3 yrs after i qualified and I ended up letting it all slip away and i felt for a long time that I would never get a career back ever again.

    Although i am not working at the moment I have come round to the idea that although i lost it once when im ready to go back to work I WILL start again from the bottom and build a new career in the health and social care sector!!

    We can do it HB! Its very difficult for us with this sodding anxiety but one way or another we will get there xx

  • Thanks for the upport and I hope you when you decide the time is right that you too will get your confidence back.

    It was difficult, I knew I didn't want to be where I was but I knew that a whole load of new stress would come with the change I am making. I hold on to the hope that once the dust settles I will be back on track!

    Good luck Caz

  • Hi anxious_ab. If I may say so it is a mistake to test yourself. You may set too high a standard for yourself and if you cannot live up to it then you may feel more anxious. Testing creates stress but acceptance and going along with it does not; doing your best in the circumstances is the best way forward. You were right to give up a job that was causing you problems. Some of us have to accept that we must work within our limits. Some years ago (I am retired now) I was given a managerial job. It did not take long before I was feeling the stress and then realised, and accepted, that I was not management material! I tended to empathise too much with those who I was supposed to manage. Not good! This caused considerable anxiety and I had to have medication to help. So I left that particular job and felt better for it even though the pay was less Confidence comes with doing and I am sure, by your blog, that you are a capable person. Who else would understand that you were overtaxing yourself? Most go on regardless and with disaterous consequences. All the very best in your new endevours. Jonathan.

  • I wish you well on your new journey. Jonathan that makes good sense.

  • Hi

    The same thing happened to me ,my last job was far too stressful and knocked down my confidence.I m my new job I had the same fears you re having but I m actually now much happier and yes the old job was horrible it wasn't t me,nobody wouldn't t cope with such a situation..my confidence is growing again day by day and I only started 2 weeks ag0!u will see what difference makes changing job..I m sure u ll be fine even though at the beginning can be unsettling .but that a normal for everyone!!good luck!!

  • Thanks everyone for your comments...three weeks to go. Nervous but optimistic for the future. :)

  • Oh my anxious-hb, How glad I am for you and well done in this current climate!

    My main stress started with incidents in work upon return from a short sick leave. Lack of support and internal politics made things worse in an already stressful job, (which I enjoyed until recently) and now I have major phases of stress where I simply can't concentrate etc.. There are now certain 'triggers' that I can 't break the cycle to and the only answer is to find employment else where. Like the above posts it is hard to to start again, but I feel it's the only choice. Good luck. Scary but exciting I should imagine! I'm still looking...

  • This week I was due to start a position I really liked the sound of but was worried about the travelling on the job as I don't drive long distances very often. I thought I would give it a go anway. The training however was due to be 2 days at a distance of 2 hours away meaning as I was taking the train I had to be up at 5.30 to catch it to be there on time and it would take me 12 hours on both of those days before starting work the next day. Leading up to the day I was fine. However on the morning I got up at 5.30 ready and had terrible sickness feeling, IBS and felt really faint. I was also looking really white. I seemed to have a panic attack too convincing myself I couldn't do the condition. When I phoned up they did say I could start the next day to get over it unfortunately I turned the offer down on how I felt. I would love to turn back time and fix this but sadly can't and I wondered if anyone had any advice on how to avoid this anxiety and sickness coming in future when starting a new position. Unfortunately I had a difficult bereavement at Christmas after my uncle went on holiday, he went missing and they found his body on New Years eve. My family think this and all the stress of loosing my original job in October due to redundancy did not help. Is there anything I can do to avoid this in future? Thanks.

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