hi im new

[lonestar]

hi im new ,i just want 2 say its great 2 know im not alone at last ! just been diagnosed after 26 years of hell ,i found out i suffer from social anxiety disorder ,2day im not having a very good time ,ive got the shakes and what feels like a whirl wind in my head !! really cant think straight ,so ive decided 2 lock myself away from the world as it all gets 2 much !!!

[hedgecrone]

Hi, lonestar. Are you having treatment from your GP, or any therapy for your social anxiety disorder? If you haven't tried relaxation or meditation CDs, some of them might help to calm you and help you cope with your symptoms. Once you feel a little calmer, you could then work with a therapist or counsellor to set yourself little tasks to increase your confidence and broaden your world - but the most important thing is BABY steps. Any tiny step is still a step forward! Hope you feel better today.

[lonestar]

hi thanks 4 getting back 2 me and ur advice is appreciated ,i am currently taking sertraline pills and waiting on a course of C.B T ! Ive tried meditation but i cant seem 2 relax ,never have been able 2 ! i understand about baby steps ,my problem is i have 2 small children whom i love very much ,ud think they would b my strength 2 get through each day but i feel so ashamed of what ive become ,due 2 the nature of my condition me and their mum seperated and i dont have any family 2 turn 2 as they all hate me due 2 our past !! i have made the first steps and really want 2 help myself but unfortunatly my head got the better of me 2day and have drunk as this is the only way i feel normal !! i feel so sad inside ,it just feels like my life is falling away from beneath my feet ,i dont want 2 drink but sometimes its the only way i can deal with it ,it breaks my heart when i cant even play with my girls ,because daddies sad again ,this life is so unfair ,i feel like a freak ,i even went 2 a spiritual church because i thought that would help but it didnt !!! i pray all the time 4 help and earlier this week i tried 2 end it because i couldnt carry on ,so had the police round ,ive driven everyone away ,i feel so lonely and i know its all my own fault just like everyone keeps telling me ,i have made the first steps i just hope its not 2 late im so confused and heart broken !! thank u though 4 ur kind words it duz mean alot !!!

[lonestar]

this isnt a cry 4 attention this is how it really is ,i admit i have a problem but surley hell is better than this ?? all my life ive been beaten ,2 the point where ive suffered 3 broken ribs ,and my face so swollen it was hanging off ,my own family beat me cause they didnt understand me ,ive been on the streets ,my own mother chose my alcholic step farther over me , i was sat in our living room once and he came in and kicked me like a football ,another time a uncle of mine blamed me 4 my mums condition and throttled me ,ive been humiliated so much ,my earliest mem is likeing a girl and being called a psyco ,but at my heart im a good person and would help anyone ,thats what i dont understand ,why ? what did i do so wrong !!! i really feel like im not ment 2 b here ,the only reason i am is because of my daughters ,i dont claim 2 b perfect but surely i didnt deserve this ,yet i blame my self !!i dont ask 4 pity or that i feel sorry 4 myself but these things really happend !!! i just feel so lost !! i feel so sorry 4 my girls 4 the world ive brought them in 2 ,then i ask myself is it any wonder im the way iam ?? i know other people have probs this i no and most of the time i put them b4 me but i cant do it anymore !!!

[lonestar]

i want 2 belive it never happend but the prob is it did !!! i just think there is no help 4 me im just destined 2 fail ,wouldnt belive ive had my own businsses ,and all the qualifications i have but im sat on my ass wiv nothing lol talk about a joke i owe this life nothing !! this morning i had 2 sell my xbox just so i could get my cats some food and make sure ive got money 2 keep incase my kids need it ,want bad im as bad as they come !! all i have 2 hang on 2 is hope cause thats all i have ,but ive started 2 think whats the point !! ive done all i can ,now ,ive given all i can 2 the point i have nothing ,wish i could wake up or be someone else ,all i ask is 4 a chance but it never comes ,i want 2 shine or at least have a chance 2 !!!

[lonestar]

and wiv all this i have social anxietiy disorder on top isnt any wonder why ,this is my experiance of this world ,wish it could all b so different but it isnt !! i am getting help so plz dont think im crazy ,belive im the nicest person u could ever meet !!! 4 all of u i hope u find ur way 4 me time will tell god bless u all : )

[lonestar]

i wish i knew why i have paid and continue 2 pay 4 the things that have happened 2 me ,ive even apologised 2 my mum 4 the way i am and everyone else ,thing i dont understand is why the people that caused this can walk around and go on holiday and live their lives like it never happened ,if i do something wrong theres a concequence ,like prison ,but these people skim through life like they never did anything wrong ,supose thats my fault 2 ?? just dont understand ??? plz there must b a voice of reason ??

[lonestar]

i feel like im talking 2 myself obviously i am , i struggle with this every single day ,i feel like im the only one though its apparent im not ,i just dont get it ??? guess il just carry on no choice but 2 !!! thought someone might listen 2 me 4 a change ????? : ( and belive me it is this bad !!!!

[lonestar]

i just want someone 2 talk 2 !!! i no i have a problem ,im still human !!! i still feel ,how i dont know !!!

[lonestar]

im a dad and i have a responsibility 4 my kids ,responsibility is all ive known !!! there has 2 b someone out there ?? i feel like im going insane i know no one can understand me but me ,but plz things cant b this bad im on my last legs though i know ill carry on !!4 my girls !!!

[lonestar]

i know i need help and im trying im just trying 2 reach out plz !!!!

[rouri]

wow calm down lonestar, you are driving yourself crazy and by doing this you are proving that anxiety is stronger than you. you have to understand your anxiety, let it go and don't fight it. everyone on this planet suffered in a way or another, I can't even start talking about myself, believe or not I turned to God and found the answer, well if your prayers are not heard for first time,secondtime,ten times, try again and again. when a baby start walking he fell over and over again but keeps trying, do not give up. I have been suffering for long time now and I still believe that one day my nightmare will end.

if you are very spiritual I would suggest you go meet the priest, tell him what you think you did wrong just for inner relief, you will be surprised how understanding can be. he will give you some advice as well, when you figure out that you are not as bad as you think you are, you will feel better. try to work on what makes you feel and upset, write them down like a list and next to them what can you do to make it better.

you will manage to play with the girls again and smile, just work on yourself.

now what i can say, STOP DRINKING sorry for the capital letter but this is the worst thing about anxiety, eat helathy, take your vitamins, don't lock yourself at home, find some anxiety groups next to your area, volunteer (even if you feel horrible but when you see other people miseries,your problem will ease before them)

we are all here for you, just ask.

peace

[lonestar]

thnk u rouri 4 the time and yes i know i need 2 stop drinking it really isnt me ,thank u 4 ur words and will try what u have said !! i just feel in so much pain that it duz feel im going crazy , i try 2 b strong but everytime i get up i get knocked back down ,thank u 4 the advice its really nice of u : )

[rouri]

hello you, don't worry and no need for thx, believe me many times I fail but for me i start crying because i have no taste for alcahol and hate it, but crying is not good as well cz it will stress me up.

I am doing acupunture today and that helps in a way.

plz make sure you do health check, when someone is stressed and suffer from anxiety they lose a lot of vitamins, the most important is vitamin B complex, which is the way to healthy heart and nervous sytem.

you are not alone, millions and millions suffer on a daily basis but they don't know that it is anxiety. I found myself thinking horrible stuff and thought I am not worth living anymore but these episodes come and goes and I know that if no one loves me, God does and this is more than enough for me.

drink some herbal teas as well at night to give you a good sleep. think positivly always. you are smart enough and what you are going through is a phase and will pass. it is not a disease and nothing is wrong with you, it is the way you behave as you get used to it, don't let people walk over you and don't be angry person at the same time, make yourself heard when needed and don't stress yourself with something that does not matter.

think of your grils and their smile, go outside and watch the birds, i talk to them sometimes and I am not crazy, you will be surprised how little by little you can feel better

anxiety hits the most sensitve and intelligen people, and you are a fighter, even after all waht happened to you, you are on your feet again, don't let somehting stupid like anxiety ruin your life. it is not easy and I have my bad days and ok days, working hard to get some good days.

will check on you later

[lonestar]

thank u ,words cant express how much ur words mean : )

[lottysunshine]

hi ! be kind to yourself is a start.. eat well , take vitamins and stop drinking if you can. Its not weak to admit you are unwell .. its a first step to recovery .. see your gp , write down what you want to say if you cannot tell them,.. you are a fighter or you wouldn't be talking on here. take life a few minutes at a time to start then a bit longer as you feel better. Im sure we have all been there.. take a small walk and really appreciate what you see and concentrate on all around you as you walk xx

[Pickle165]

HI lonester, i had suffered for years with social anxiety and can relate to your symtoms. i really feel for you today, hope tomorrow is a better day and please email me when ever you want to talk. x

[lonestar in reply to Pickle165]

thanks sam1981 x

[lonestar]

thanks 2 all who have written as u can guess im not great at the moment ,i will take it slowly and try 2 b kinder 2 myself !! thanks 4 ur advice and kind words and maybe when when i feel a bit better i will message u all 2 let u know how im doing many thanks : )

[rouri]

you are already thinking positively when you said I will message you when I feel better, this is the correct phrasing, you didn't say IF i get better which is a good sign that you still have positive energy in you. here you go so happy

have a good night sleep, remember and here a tip if by any chance you wake up at night and couldn't sleep anymore don't be upset as it happens with anxiety sufferers, just put the TV on something silly (not action) and you get bored and go back to sleep in no time

good night

[lisa35]

u aint the anyone one i know wots its like wen ur head doing over time and u cant think straight but thats wen ur memory is affected hun and yea i dont wanna leave the house some days its horrible x

[lonestar]

hi guys just want 2 say thanks again 4 the other day !! makes a diffrence having people i can relate 2 !!! guess really its on words and up words !! i guess alot of my problem is i dont have anyone 2 talk 2 ,guess thats changed thank u !!! took ur advice on board rouri and will try some of what u advised !! and thanks lisa35 and everyone else that commented : ) dont feel 2 bad 2 day ,bit spaced out ,but i think thats due 2 the meds !!!

[rouri in reply to lonestar]

been through a lot and do have more tips, just ask when you need anything. by the way if anxiety hit you with a racing heart drink some cold water and it will slow down, or just munch on a cold apple, is something to do with the body temperature and mind thinks that your body is drowning and slow down your heart beat to save oxygen

very happy you are a lilo better, progress after all and anytime you are welcome