I feel as though i expect too much from my friends and tend to treat them more like items and not individuals , they’re people with their own issues and their own identities and desires , I’ve come to realize that i may not be great with platonic relationships, internally i get clingy and irrational and i paint these mental pictures of being rejected or overlooked by them . I keep to myself most of the time but I know how to be social , on the contrary i overthink a lot .. and when people change their pattern of interaction with me i worry, but constantly going in this emotional rollercoaster of thought over the years has drained me and i want to grow and move on
The interesting thing is that I don’t have a problem with being by myself ,keeping my own company and learning myself, but no one wants to be alone always, i spend a lot of time with myself trying to dissect why i react so negatively to my friend’s actions and i then seclude myself but im not sure how to get over this particular insecurity ...