How do I overcome this?

[Guest135]

I was feeling really anxious so wanted to get it out a bit. I am meant to start uni this year and I am really really nervous to go. That is the only thing I can think of, i have tried distracting myself but my mind comes back to this, it really makes me scared. I should be happy that I have got into the course I wanted to get in, but I am dreading it so much that even the thought of doing my course doesn’t excite me anymore. The thing that really worries me is that I am going to alone, I didn’t have many friends during my school days, mainly because I was too worried and anxious to be in social situations, so they slowly stopped inviting me out. I am really worried that I am going to end up being all alone with no one to talk to at all, this thought alone has made me cry multiple times. To overcome this, I thought I might join some uni groups for my course and accommodation and it has made it more awkward than helping me, I joined 2 groups, one offer holder and one confirmed group through the offer holder group, but I only introduced myself in the confirmed one, didn’t really see the point in introducing myself in the other one. I think that is probably the main reason why whenever I type anything in the offer holder one, they just ignore me, I don’t know how to fix it, I really didn’t mean any harm and didn’t want my uni life on the wrong foot with anyone, and other groups I have joined, I have joined quite late, so I don’t really know how to make it less awkward and have introduced myself but there has been no response despite people already seeing them, which is ok, it is understandable. This has all exacerbated my anxiety even more and I am absolutely dreading starting uni. My biggest fear is being alone at uni with no friends whatsoever, there are so many what ifs in my mind and I am moving far from home. I feel like I am going insane from all the nervousness. I probably do need help, thank you for reading my rant.

[Ladybug9]

Rant all you need to!! And first thing you need to do is get out of your head!! There is someone whispering things that are negative into those ears. Chase them out immediatley!!

[Guest135 in reply to Ladybug9]

Yep trying to get rid of the negative thoughts but struggling pretty badly with it

[Ladybug9 in reply to Guest135]

Let me know if you ever need or want to talk!! I certainly understand like others do as well.

[Elisa18]

Sorry to hear you are so anxious about starting uni.

My daughter is also starting uni but she is not moving in until the second semester. However, she is also very nervous about making friends.

You should not worry too much. Everyone is in the same position. Moving in with people they don't know. They will also be anxious.

The uni will make you feel welcome and have things organised, be it online or face to face, to help you make friends. Be brave and take part in things. Get involved with things going on in your accomodation. Relax and be you.

Don't worry excessively as you are just guessing that you will not make friends. You don't actually really know this, you are looking at the worse case. Try thinking things will be ok and you will eventually meet some nice friends. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. You are there to learn and gain a good qualification to Get the job you want, you will meet loads of people and possibly some good friends. You won't feel lonely but remember there will be many clubs and activities you can join which will have like minded people. So have a look at what you may be interested in.

Good luck

[Guest135 in reply to Elisa18]

Thank you! That is true, everyone will be in the same boat, I just really hope it is bette r than school, didn’t really have any good experiences in school, so I want to change it around, I want to make more friends and be a lot more social, but my anxiety gets in the way, when I am relaxed, I am usually quite fun to be around, but once I get anxious, I start stammering and that is when I get boring, and that has happened a lot in school resulting in my few friends and therefore fear of uni next year :(, I am going to try my best to put myself out there, good luck to you daughter too!

[pink318]

Hi- When I went to university I was also nervous and scared. I was timid when I started my college and I was worried about meeting new friends. I had a classmate who was very kind and she understood that I was shy. We became friends and she helped me to adjust to college life.

My son is a rising sophomore and when he started college, he joined organizations to meet new friends. His freshman year went well and he enjoyed it. I pray that you will also enjoy your days in the university. Join clubs that you think you will learn and enjoy. Please keep us posted. Take care.

[Guest135]

Thank you! That is really sweet of you! I need all the prayers that I can get at this stage 😂, i am going to try and throw myself out there as much as I can, but it is mainly my fear of being judged which causes me not to do things much which results in me being pretty lonely, I am trying my utter best to not feel nervous and anxious, but struggling a lot. Thank you for your kind words