Socialising

[CatK1991]

Anybody else used to socialise with alot of people and over the months or years secluded yourself? To the point that even the thought of being around crowds of people feels like a challenge, even people that you class as your friends you feel completely awkard around and don't really feel you know how to socialise, i'm wanting to find ways of making new friends but even the thought of being around friends and family you already have is so challenging sometimes...not really sure if i'm after an answer for this to be honest...just hoping i'm not alone in this

[BossMom2019]

Yes ma’am!! Exactly what I feel when I want to get out with others

[Khonkaen]

I myself am treading water for this first year. I socialise about half as much as I used to, but go out with my wife more. I have put plans on hold too, as the minute I think I am doing okay and back to normal I get a wake up call.

IMO you have to force yourself, just dont give a monkey's what other people think and enjoy youself. If you feel anxiety creeping on and it won't go away, make your appolgies and haed for home. Live to fight another day.

Someone here said forget about your heart attack and get on with life.

[CatK1991 in reply to Khonkaen]

I completely agree...I went through a phase very similar to this one about 15 years ago, I forced myself to take part in a theatre group and made myself socialise, it wasnt easy but gave me the confidence and friends I needed, sometimes having the time to sit and think about the situations makes them so much worse, as you say sometimes you just have to feel the fear and do things anyway

[Kainan]

Yeah, I can relate; I've definitely had periods where I felt awkward and uncomfortable around people. Even times when I couldn't leave the house. I agree with what you said; if you think too much about a situation beforehand it's going to be harder because in your mind, you've already inadvertently set some sort of expectation, which opens the door to anxiety. I tell myself if I have something to say, just say it. It's not such a big deal. Maybe sometimes what you say may not sit well with other folks, but much more often than not, the experience will be a positive one, and one that you can learn from. Just be who you are. This forum is a great place to start socializing as you get to chat and meet with other folks and also perhaps better learn about yourself. It's all a learning experience

[CatK1991 in reply to Kainan]

I completely agree!

I am so sorry its taken me so long to reply I can never remember once I get off this forum how I get back on it

I try my best not to care what people think and from a young age I have been lile that but I have noticed over the past few years it has become more and more of a struggle and I find myself worrying almost daily about things that never used to bother me

I completely agree this forum is such a great place to start and the fact that is filled with like-minded people who just want to help others makes it all the worth while, to know that there are other people who feel the same or worry about the sane situations makes us realise how much we can help eachother and how much we aren't actually alone like we sometimes feel we are, thank you so much for your reponse it is so nice to know there are people willing to help eachother

Much appreciated

[Kainan in reply to CatK1991]

Exactly! Their are so many wonderful folks on here that look out for one another. It’s a great community to be a part of. I always enjoy reading about how people are getting along in their lives. How they’re turning the tide to their own battles, and helping each other figure things out. It’s something special

[Madmin1]

Do you take any medication yet like beta blockers

[Marshall64]

You have put into words exactly how I feel but couldn't articulate. I used to not have problems around friends or family but now I get anxious if my friends want to get together. My situation may be due to that I start comparing my life to others. I see everything in my life in a negative light and others seem perfect.

[CatK1991 in reply to Marshall64]

Conpletely agree...you find yourself end up judging your own life sometimes instead of focusing on the positives and ignoring what everybody else is doing...I never used to judge my life and how its going but I find myself doing it more and more these days for no reason

[Marshall64 in reply to CatK1991]

I used to do social media but that made my social anxiety worse. I know that what you see may not always be the great life people portray but it still affects me. I tend to overthink everything and wonder if what I just said or did was stupid (although it probably was 😋).

[CatK1991 in reply to Marshall64]

I completely agree this is what I often tend to do, I then thought to myself "I can change my life to how I want it"...it sounds cliche but I tried to think more about what i wanted from life and the more I thought of that the less I thought of everybody elses lives...it sounds so bad but sometimes being selfish is a blessing, thinking about yourself and the stuff you want to get out of life...hope this helps a little bit