All of It

[Blue_15]

The slump is back. Although this time it feels more personal. Instead of just being numb and emotionless I feel mentally exhausted from feeling too much all at once. I know what the problems are and I am aware of them but there are just so many that I don’t know where to start. A part of me wants to go back to ‘happy’ or whatever but the other part wants everything to be difficult. Things I used to love to do feel like chores. I’m going through the motions and honestly, I just want to enjoy life. I’m young and I know I have time to figure things out. But as an extremely impatient and anxious person it feels like if I don’t fix my issues now they will never heal. I want to laugh with my siblings and be free with my friends but I feel trapped. Like I’m not really there. I don’t know if anyone else feels that way but...in general, it sucks. I just want my brain to pick an emotion and deal with it instead feeling everything all at once.