Can’t make a decision : I have to make a... - Anxiety Support

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Can’t make a decision

Miss-P74 profile image
Miss-P74

I have to make a important decision about moving and my head is all over the place.

One minute I’m leaving the next I should stay. I can’t seem to make my mind up. Indecisive constantly.

I know it’s the anxiety but I’m struggling. I don’t want to stay then regret it and I don’t want to move then regret that too.

I think about this constantly and it’s driving me crazy.

19 Replies

Hi, I would say that the fact you are considering moving means there is a need to move.

Change of routine or circumstances when you have anxiety always seems far worse than it actually is. Moving home is a naturally stressful event anyway even for someone without anxiety.

What are your concerns ? Can they all be put down to anxiety or is the move something you just don’t want to do (ie leave friend and family etc).

It’s frustrating I know when you seem to just switch back and forth on a decision but I’m sure in your heart you will know the answer.

As easy as it sounds, as I know full well it isn’t, try not to let anxiety make a decision for you.

Hope this helps 😏😀👍

Hey! Thank you for your reply. 😊 the new home is only 10 minutes away from where I live now. I have a troublesome neighbour and it’s quite lonely where I am. No one likes to walk up the hill to my house. To be fair it is a big old hill! I live in a 2 bedroom and the new flat is only one. But it’s a house property. Plus there wouldn’t be much change to my routine but I would see a lot more of family as nearby them too.

I’ve never lived in a one bedroom. I don’t really use my 2nd bedroom it use it as a walk in wardrobe! So it is something I could do without. I think!

I have a beautiful view of London too and a little outside space. The new home doesn’t. It’s a lovely home and I think I could make it mine I’m just scared I guess of change and having a one bed. Which I know I am very lucky to even have a home. The anxiety is huge right and I really think I’m am overthinking it to much!

Sorry for the long old rant Mrhealthanxitey!

😣

Hi, LOL that wasn't a long rant i have definitely written longer ones !....I'm trying to be careful not to sway you either way as of course its your decision, but from the outside it seems you feel moving is the right thing but you just have a few reservations about the new place ?, if your'e unsure maybe another option is to keep looking for another property that fully ticks all you boxes ? (2 bed etc), and in the meantime you can work on your anxiety to reduce the immediate pressure ?

Is the 1 bed a bigger bedroom ?, ie can you get a big wardrobe for all you clothes ;-) which then alleviates the need for 2 bed ......I guess it really depends on how you see the future, if you don't plan for people to stay much or have a flat mate etc then 1 bed could work...

Not sure im actually helping !, but i'm sure you will make the right choice, i wish you well.

Haha. That’s good then. I can go on and on at times when full of anxiety!

I totally understand that but you wouldn’t be swaying me. I know this isn’t decision to make but gosh it’s so hard.

Haha. Yes. I would buy a wardrobe for my clothes! I would have to now. Haven’t had one in years! I like space and not having a lot of bedroom furniture is lovely. But I guess cosy is good too.

I don’t think I would get as close to family and friends if I waited for a 2 bedroom in that area. It’s highly sort after and they don’t come up often as good commute and schools near by.

You know what Mrhealthanxiety. I’m just going have to do it a move. I am not really settled in the place I am in or I wouldn’t even be thinking of moving would I!?

I do have family stay over but not in the wardrobe 😂 so I guess I’m not looking a room in that way!

I can do this. I just had a little boost of confidence (will probably be gone by lunchtime !) I think I should sign the papers!

💁🏻‍♀️✨

For sure you have made a decision it seems and i'm so so sure it's the right decision as you wouldn't be this close to moving now if deep down you knew it wasn't right.

It really does just seem to me that this is a last minute NATURAL anxiety issue as it gets close and its NOT due to you feeling its the wrong decision.

Dig deep knowing you are making the right choice moving, embrace it and look forward to making your new place just as you want it, and hey who wants to walk up that hill anymore anyway !

Go sign those papers and then watch the anxiety lift !...I look forward to house warming party LOL ;-)

I’m trying to dig really deep! Really am I think I am making he right choice. I guess until I am there living there I will not know yet. I had a good feel of the property so I think in my heart it’s a good move!

That was the problem. Not knowing it it was anxiety making me indecisive or just natural fears !

Haha. Yes everyone including me if I am honest hates that hill! Ha.

I’ll send the invite soon then 😂

You have been fab as always. Thank You 🙏🏻 x

I’m so sure it’s the right choice with exciting times ahead, good luck with the move (especially clearing out that dressing room 🤣) and keep in touch. X

😂 I’ve so much to clear out ! Thank you and yes of course! Speak again very soon. X

When Im suffering from anxiety, panic, mood swings.... its only natural I will be incapable of thinking clearly since my emotions are going to cloud my judgement.

I would write down all the reasons for moving and not - all reasons I can think of. Then strike out whichever are based on whims. Then see which outweighs the other. Get someone to help if tgats an option.

Miss-P74 profile image
Miss-P74 in reply to Bilabong

Thank you 😊. That’s exactly it. I’m full of anxiety making the decision and it’s one that needs to be made ASAP! but never seem to stick with one I’ve made.

Yes the list will help I have actually made one and the winner was to leave !

I’m hoping I make the right choice cos once I’m gone I can’t go back!

Thank you for your time in replying. Appreciate it. ✨

Hi I tooo faced a very important decision way back in '96 when I had a choice of taking voluntary severence in my job, and either staying in London and getting another job, or moving to be with my parents and sisters. I agonised over this for months continually changing my mind.

Two things swayed me. The first was a manager at work who said you usually have to make decisions without having all the facts.

And two my sister saying what's the worst could happen, and few decisions are irreversible if I didn't like it. They were both right so I took the plunge. Most times I don't regret it and I am still in the same area.

I hope this helps you a bit. x

Miss-P74 profile image
Miss-P74 in reply to hypercat54

Hi Hypercat! Thank you for your helpful story. Gosh it really is hard isn’t it making tough decisions, especially regarding jobs and homes. They are the biggest things we need and have to make the right choices over. I think I will move. As I mention above. If I was happy in my home now I wouldn’t even be considering leaving it right !? X

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to Miss-P74

Well either that or you desperately need a change. Like I said though few decisions are irreversible so what have you got to lose? x

Miss-P74 profile image
Miss-P74 in reply to hypercat54

Yes. I think I need a lot! Something isn’t quite right with me being there. Thanks Hypercat54. ✨

Thank you all. You have really helped me I really appreciate that 💖

Is it a long distance move?

Miss-P74 profile image
Miss-P74 in reply to Jaxs050783

No. Still local-ish! Just different place

Jaxs050783 profile image
Jaxs050783 in reply to Miss-P74

My mind is fogged when suffering also.

I try to write things down and sit and think.

Miss-P74 profile image
Miss-P74 in reply to Jaxs050783

I’ve done that too. I think I would be better off in new place, so for the moment I’m going with that. I think moving it the option for me.

The cloudiness is lifting and I’m still feeling the same to move. So that’s a good thing!

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