Choosing between a job you have and a job offer you received causing anxiety and to be depressed

[Jmerrick22]

I don’t get it. To make a long story short, I hate when I feel this way I can’t stand it, and I know the anxiety part is making that worse. I was offered a new job that has good benefits and more money. The job I have now I do like in a way, but I’m taken advantage of, and it makes me depressed. I hesitate making the decision to stay or leave and it has me depressed because I don’t know what to do. I like change but at the same time it scares me a lot. Today just hasn’t been a good day, I’m having up and down moods. If I’m occupied pretty good then it’s not so bad, but like for example I just got home and it starts again. I do take buspar, and it does really help but for some reason idk, maybe it’s because I’ve been holding in my feelings lately. I feel like I randomly want to cry or I need a good cry. And then a manager at a local store I was told fell over dead at work the other day, and death alone triggers me. Then the anxiety makes me feel like I’m unreal or like I’m detached. Yes I recognize my surroundings but things still feel different. Idk how to explain. It just all scares and depresses me.

[kenster1]

hi I think you nearly answered your own question.if your ok with change then go for it and put your worries aside.hey and who wouldn't want more money.

[Fumble]

Hey, since your current job was stressing you before it sounds like a change and some more money might be good and help you sort your home out.

Derealisation and depersonalisation isn’t something to be scared of, it’s not a nice feeling but you know where you are and what you are doing.

Making a decision won’t immediately stop your anxiety but you’ll be moving on and it will go. As your stress levels drop you’ll feel better.

Take care

[Jmerrick22 in reply to Fumble]

When my anxiety’s high like this i get paranoid. Like I don’t wanna be alone etc. it’s a scary uncomfortable feeling. I feel like I wanna cry but can’t

[Agora1 in reply to Jmerrick22]

Hi Jmerrick22, stay on the forum and talk,. It may help you some.

[jeanesdream in reply to Jmerrick22]

Me too. Cant even go onto a store alone right now. Really terrible. I had to quit a great

paying job because it was so stressful that i couldnt bear to go back to it. Now im broke and stressed so bad over it that my bp is sky high.

[Jmerrick22 in reply to jeanesdream]

Sounds just like me. But my scariest thing is when I’m highly stressed or anxious, I swear I get these depersonalization symptoms. I feel so detached like I’m not here, and the whole concept of time seems strange. I probably make no sense at all, but it’s hard to explain. It’s like time is moving so fast and I feel detached from the world. And when I get anxious my mind thinks about death and dying a lot which I know is common with anxiety but I just wish it would go away, it scares me even more, and the cycle begins. I wish I could learn how to handle all this. But somehow I don’t know what triggers me. Finances are one, and maybe it’s death. I had a few close people die and idk. I’m just kinda down and frustrated and I’ve been in a depressive episode once and I really felt at my lowest. I’m so scared to go back there again, it’s almost like it traumatized me, and now I lost my health insurance so I have to take care of that and get a therapist again. Sometimes I feel like my ego thinks I don’t need one but i know I do. And exercise which I don’t do much. I’m sorry for the speech.

[ChicagoGirl1961]

As far as the job, I would work at the one I think I would be happier than and that would be best suited for me when taking anxiety into consideration. Money and benefits are important, but IMO they should not be the primary basis for your decision. Good luck.

[Jmerrick22]

Another day and woke up depressed. I wish this would go away. I’m scared it’s gonna last along time.

[Fumble]

Sorry to hear that you're still depressed.

Why don't you write down the pros and cons of each job to help you decide? Maybe talk it through with a friend, talking about it might help you work out which is best for you.

How long until you have to say yes or no to the new job?

[Jmerrick22 in reply to Fumble]

Tomorrow lol

[Fumble]

So how's the pros and cons list for each job going?

[Jmerrick22]

I haven’t even started yet. I’ve been out, trying not to be home much or i get worse

[Fumble]

Can you sit somewhere warm, in a coffee shop or mall , and start a list on your phone then? Or go to a friends and talk to them about the two jobs?

[Fumble]

Hey, how are you doing?