Pushing away my partner : My anxiety is... - Anxiety Support

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Pushing away my partner

xmollyyy profile image
6 Replies

My anxiety is becoming so bad, I feel like I’m pushing my boyfriend away... I’m not interested in any sort of sexual activity, and if I am it lasts for about 5/10 minutes then it’s gone and I don’t want to do anything apart from sleep,I get jumpy whenever he touches me and he thinks I’m not interested in him anymore and I don’t know what to do or how to explain why I’m acting the way I am

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xmollyyy
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6 Replies
Worried-help profile image
Worried-help

Hi Molly. Does he know about your anxiety?. If he doesn't maybe just sit down with him and explain exactly how you feel. He can help you and understand you better if you let him in and let him know that it has nothing to do with him, if this guy is good to you and you love him don't loose him. It's hard to find good men that you are compatible with now a days. Also have you seen a Therapist about this ?.

xmollyyy profile image
xmollyyy in reply toWorried-help

Hiya and yes he does,he’s seen me on my lowest days and my best days but I still feel like I’m pushing him out,I’m probably overthinking because it’s what I normally do but I’m just worried. We’ve had hundreds of talks about it,and he’s even got a book about it,he’s spoke to my councillor too.

Worried-help profile image
Worried-help in reply toxmollyyy

I think it's great that he is giving you support, maybe try asking him how he has been feeling lately when it comes to your intimacy and take it from there. I always had a big issue with communication in my relationships because I was with someone in the past who didn't let me express myself and that lingered on to the next, so I think it's great that you have a supportive bf, he's a keeper.

I can definitely relate to your story...but...as commented by Swan2018 you need to explain your partner how you feel and what you are going through. If you want to continue with this relationship then communication and conversation is the key here.

In my previous relationship I never communicated with my boyfriend about my anxieties and panic attacks as I didn’t want to look crazy, weak or not normal. Instead I thought I managed to hide it well but I didn’t. I became whinny, a nag and I was so bloody needy. This was because my anxieties made me feel insecure and I needed constant attention and reassurance from him. The relationship ended (which was a good thing because he was not a nice person). I’m seeing a different guy now and we have been together for over 3 years. I tell him how I feel and he’s supportive and loving. If I overreact then I later apologise and explain myself. It doesn’t make me look weak or crazy. It just makes me a human with anxiety 😂. So please ensure you explain it to him

xmollyyy profile image
xmollyyy in reply to

Love this! It’s really helped thank you so much! And I’m so glad you’ve got someone who supports you❤️

alvoltaris profile image
alvoltaris

I had the same situation. My boyfriend used to touch me and tried to kiss me but I just didn’t feel comfortable so I kept pushing him away. Then he always thought that I was having affair because I was not into him anymore but actually it was not. Then we started having some space and then when I started feeling easeful again I talk to him and I explained everything. I hope you and your boyfriend will do everything well and explanation is the key, Keep being honest and sincere. And trust me he’s a good guy so he will respect you.

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