What is wrong with me?

[Fizzley]

Well.. Everyone thinks I am normal. Sure enough i can act like I am on the outside but its been so long since I let anyone see how i really am on the inside.

I guess it all started last year. I had a reliable best friend and a squad with me. I was happy. I know I felt happy. But I met this guy and.. he made me do things I really regret doing. He introduced me into smoking and ditching class and stuff. The typical delinquent crap. I got into a lot of trouble with my parents. He would have too if I did not take action and hurt myself. My parents kept quiet in fright of me going to extreme distances.

But at the start of this year things got worse and my parents transferred me to another high school and took away my phone. But I talked to him by borrowing people's phones. Me and my best friend also grew a bit distant and one day the guy left me. My best friend liked him and they started dating. I was shattered. I started to focus more on my new surroundings but after that blow i was still recovering. I met people who were nice but that never actually clicked with me the way my squad did. I just cant seem to get along with anyone. And to make it worse, when i finally got over the fact that what has happened has happened, I noticed that I cant feel. Its so strange. Its like my mind is commanding me to act happy when someone gives me a gift. I can even cry in will and cant feel anything. It feels like there is a hole where my heart is. I just cant take it anymore. I don't know what to do. Please help me..

[Delanna]

Darling you are in high school wait till you get into college now before you think I am sounding pessimistic I am not . In fact I am being realistic with you . You are going to expierence so many challanges wonderful and yet bittersweet.

You are going to enjoy it and learn acknowledge true faces and fake ones

Millions of fish in the sea aka therr are plenty of guys out there . You just gotta date the one who actually listens to your heart not your bestfriend's !