Paranoid thoughts?

[Jmerrick22]

So anyone get paranoid thoughts? My mind runs wild at times and the doctor told me Justin, you need to eliminate stress somehow your on mental overload. I literally would never hurt myself or anyone yet I seek reassurance that I wouldn’t. I hate being alone. That makes me really paranoid. I had myself to a point one time that I got rid of all the knives and cleaning chemicals petrified I’d snap and start drinking the chemicals etc. I’m so afraid that I’m loosing reality and cracking up. I don’t want to die I’m petrified of it. I somehow sense this has a lot to do with death. I lost my grandparents a few years back. I get myself to the point I feel like handcuffing my hands together so I don’t do anything, I’m that paranoid. Ugh 😑 anxiety you really can drive someone nuts. Then a kid I went to school with was found dead.. that got me like oh my god what if I’d ever lose it and do something. I can’t afford to die yet alone I worry about my family if something happened to me. Then I’m like oh my god please don’t let me be schizophrenic. Nothing talks to me thank god ! I psych myself out

[Hidden]

Hi Jmerrick

It sounds to me like you have OCD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I had a bout of that a few years back and it was quite horrible so I can relate to you. Maybe you could see if your doctor might think that might be causing your thoughts that you will hurt yourself.. I am not saying you have it but only that it sounds like it from your description. In any case it can really take over ones life so better to get help sooner rather than later.. what do you think?

[Jmerrick22 in reply to Hidden]

My psychologist said it’s GAD as did another one as well, but it does sound like ocd symptoms as well. All I know is I need some relief

[Hidden in reply to Jmerrick22]

Can you stop doing things that feed your paranoia? If you don't respond to it it may get better.. thats how I dealt with it, just a suggestion.

[flaxxy703]

command yourself not to act on an obsessive thought and it will die of inanition.

[Indigojoe]

Justin,

you are insightful and articulate. You are not going crazy because you outline, in detail what is going on with you.

SO take that off the list.

Without knowing you, the person, based on what you write, you are the perfect personality type for sustained exercise.

Jog, run, bike for 45 minutes, do not stop.

Find a local store that will let you do stock work,

...bags of dog food, cases of canned goods, go to the store room and move cases of IV fluids. Sustained physical work usually brings relief withing 30-40 minutes and the mind clears, for many folks.

[Jmerrick22 in reply to Indigojoe]

thank you. I think I literally have too much time on my hands, but in the same sense I'm having a hard time concentrating. ugh. what a cycle. I do feel like just crying though. its like so much pent up emotion. I'm making a psychologist apt, and hoping to get back on Prozac. I hate meds, but at the same time if they help at least for the time being with the focusing and such then ill do it.

[Indigojoe in reply to Jmerrick22]

hit the shower and have a huge snot dripping ugly cry.

Trigger it with a movie a thought or whatever.

The only thing that is going to make you feel better is to be real about what you need.

[Hidden]

Have you tried zoloft or lexepro?