I'm 26 years old, moderate health. Had endoscopy last Friday that diagnosed bile gastritis. I seem to get full quickly, nauseous after eating and tons of gas and belching.
I'm hitting absolute rock bottom here. I'm worried that I actually have pancreatic cancer. I've been fearful of it for a few days and yesterday I have diarrhea, French's mustard yellow. I've been concerned that my stools were a little lighter than usual, but this was straight up yellow.
I'm under an immense amount of stress, depression, and anxiety. I've been having strange on again off again pains in my abdomen, lost 5 lbs in 11 days, and I'm urinating constantly. I haven't slept much in 5 days. I don't know if this is all just anxiety and depression. I've jumped between various illnesses over that last few days and my wife and mother are just treating me like it's all fake.
For those brave enough to click (stool image warning), I've included an image of my most recent bm. Please tell me what color you think it is now.
I also forgot, when examining my eyes closely (looking at the bloodshot corners and underneath the eyelids), I'm convinced I'm developing jaundice as it seems like its yellow to me and not just from lack of sleep. I'm also getting horrible lower back pain.
I think that you answered your own question. You mentioned “I’ve jumped between various illnesses over the last few days”.....you surely don’t have stomach cancer, pancreatic cancer and bile gastritis all at the same time. The odds of that happening are surely like one in a bazillion. Many of the symptoms that you mention can be directly related to anxiety. So, the symptoms that you are having are not fake....but the likelihood that you have pancreatic cancer based on that is unlikely. I also struggle with health anxiety. It is hard. So hard. But, it can be managed and you can do that!!
I can't get past the feeling that I'm right about it. My biggest fear with health anxiety is the worry that I might have gotten it right this time and I won't be doing anything about it.
I know it's a lot to ask but did you look at the image I posted?
I'm 1500% convinced I have pancreatic cancer and I'm going to die soon. The fear of what's after (the worry that we just no longer exist, or maybe there is a heaven) is what gets me. Being so young, I don't want to leave my wife without actually having lived a life together.
I've already seen psychiatrist and was prescribed medication but they have put it in yet. I recognize that I have a problem, but can't get past the point of feeling like there's more to it.
I didn’t. I’m not a doctor so I couldn’t tell you if your excrement looked like it should or not. I totally get where you are coming from though. I believe I have heart disease and am going to have a heart attack at any moment. I have a husband and two young kids. The fact of the matter is, even if I am right about it, my worry won’t stop the heart attack from happening. My worry won’t reverse the heart disease. If you feel like you need a second opinion, get one. But if that comes back all clear, you have to work on accepting the fact that the problem is with your anxiety and not cancer. I wish you the best of luck. I know how demoralizing health anxiety can be!!
Pancreatic cancer is very rare at your age. Are you seeing a gastroenterologist. If not, you should. You may simply have irritable bowel syndrome, but checking is likely to set your mind at rest.
Plzsendhelp, you've obviously seen a doctor and no doubt discussed all your illnesses with him or her. Your endoscopy has shown mild inflamation in your stomach caused by reflux (easily remedied by medication).
The stomach is the first organ to start complaining when we experience health anxiety. It is the most sympathetic organ to nerves that have become over sensitised by worry, trauma, overwork, disappointment and despair. And what most people call the stomach actually includes their bowels as well.
No you don't have stomach cancer. No you don't have pancreatic cancer. If your doctor thought for a moment you did he/she would have sent you for a stomach scan. But s/he didn't.
What you do have is many of the classic symptoms of anxiety disorder/health anxiety known only too well to most of us here. You are not the first to feel this way and won't be the last.
But I have to agree with your wife and mother, with the exception of the gastritis all your symptoms are fake. If all those illnesses you say you've jumped between in recent years were subject to scans and x-rays and blood tests nothing would show up.
Although you have all the symptoms and discomfort of all those illnesses that you feel in reality you only have the symptoms, you don't have the illnesses.
That's because over sensitised nerves are brilliant at mimicking genuine physical illness. So you end up with all the aches and pains but mercifully you don't actually have the terrible illnesses themselves. Your symptoms are frauds, confidence tricks, scams or as your mother and wife put it fakes.
I'm going to suggest that you've been directing all of your attention in the wrong direction. You've been trying to cure yourself of all these illnesses of which you have the symptoms. I have to tell you: you can't cure yourself of illnesses you don't have no matter how hard you try.
So AVERT YOUR ATTENTION AWAY FROM ALL THOSE SYMPTOMS and direct it to the single cause if all these troubles. Your over sensitised nervous system that was caused and is being maintained by the copious amounts of fear hormones you are constantly lashing it with. If you could find a a way of freeing yourself of fear your nerves would return to normal, all the fake symptoms would disappear and you would recover.
What I suggest you do is to stop fighting your symptoms. You've been fighting them quite a while, has it done you any good? Of course not, fighting only causes more tension and strain, the last thing you need.
So stop fighting and surrender to the symptoms instead. Agree to co-exist with them (for the time being). Agree to ACCEPT all the bad feelings (for the moment) calmly and with the absolute minimum of fear. I'm suggesting you do the OPPOSITE of everything you've been doing so far.
By now you must know that there's nothing seriously physically wrong with you and that you will live at least to 100. All that worry was completely unnecessary as fake symptoms can't kill, disable or send you mad. They really can't.
So accept the symptoms utterly and completely knowing THAT BY DOING SO YOU ARE GOING TO BRING ABOUT YOUR RECOVERY. Because you can't fear those symptoms if you're accepting them (for the time being).
That very briefly is the roadplan for your recovery. The full and far more inspirational version can be found in Claire Weekes' little book titled quite simply 'Self help for your nerves' which can be ordered from Amazon. I thoroughly recommend it.
Such calm wisdom Jeff. You must have been through a lot yourself one time to be able to help and advise and calm people as you do.
I am still fighting! My anxiety, muscle pains, nausea faint and panicky feelings. I know I have nothing physical wrong with me , I have had so many tests and scans.
It's the fear of being out of control and embarrassing myself in public that keeps it going for me, oh and too much time to think. Such as I'll keep thinking, how am I feeling now, what hurts, do I feel sick, do I feel faint and if I am having a good few moments I wonder how long it will last. So consequently because I start thinking, it doesn't last long.
I got over horrible bowel symptoms every morning by calming myself down.
And I have suffered like this for over 3 years now. And when you realise you are doing it to yourself, it's such a waste of life.I don't enjoy things as I used to and have lost the confidence to go anywhere on my own..
But I won't give up, I am getting stronger and being proactive by doing yoga and trying to help those aching muscles.
In a nut shell, your post helped me too. Thank you J x
Funkyfaerie, thanks for your kind words but I merely pass on the wisdom of the late Doctor Claire Weekes, namely her acceptance method for recovery from anxiety disorder, as expressed in her books and YouTube clips and in particular her first book 'Self help with your nerves'.
Nobody should worry about embarrassing themselves in public, it's very unlikely to happen anyway and if you do have a bit of a melt down then So what? and Who cares? Nobody should stay home because of what strangers might think. In reality they will probably be a lot more understanding than we think.
You have obviously made good progress but it's clear from what you say that you haven't reached that stage of acceptance where it doesn't matter whether your anxiety is playing up today or not. You say you still engage in introspection, checking for symptoms and wondering how long symptom-free times will last. And you mention 'still fighting' though the stress and tension of fighting helps to keep us over sensitised.
Muscular tension caused by anxiety can be very uncomfortable but it is still anxiety and by changing our relationship with anxiety we can bring forward our recovery.
I wish you God's speed in your progress to a full cure of all your symptoms.
Just so that you are aware, yellow stool may be a result of the increased bile productivity, which it sounds like you have, which can be brought on by anxiety. (It such a viscous circle, isn’t it?) If you had any cancer related to your digestive system it would have most definitely been evident in your blood work.
I have health anxiety as well and I know exactly what it feels like when your mind is convinced that your body is failing and whatever is happening might be the end of you. Some days it’s really hard to get a grip on it.
This may sound odd but a few years back my therapist began asking me questions like, “So what if you are sick?”, “ What if you did die today?” It felt so harsh at the time but then I started examining my relationship with my own mortality and the thoughts and feelings around it. So while I treated the symptoms with western medicine I began to treat my brain with eastern medicine and I explored my spirituality. I don’t subscribe to any particular organized religion but I explored my beliefs about the ever after and found a certain peace there. Then I learned about living mindfully in the moment. Not thinking of the past or worrying about what may come. Just living in the perfect present moment. And there was peace there as well.
I’m sorry that you feel like this. I know it seems hopeless but with work and dedication you can rise above it all.
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I am TERRIFIED I have stomach cancer
Anxiety and fear of cancer 
fear of pancreatic cancer ruining my life
I am really in so much of fear and pain
