Just joined this community

Hi,

I've just joined this community as I suffer badly from anxiety. It's literally ruining my life and the last few

days especially have been really bad.

As I also suffer from depression, I'm a member on the Action against Depression forum, but I didn't know

this one was here as well!

So I decided to join it and hope to get some support and advice how I can deal with my anxiety better..

Thanks,

Holly101 x

24 Replies

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  • Hi Holly,

    Welcome to site hope your ok today :)

    Mimii x

  • Thanks Mimii,

    I'm ok-ish, been having a bad couple of days and haven't left the house or got dressed, which I know

    will just make it worse an harder as time goes on to get out of it..

    So tomorrow I'll start again, and make sure I do something positive that'll make me feel better.

    Which is always so much easier to say at night than it is in the morning for some reason! ;)

    Holly Xx

  • Well thats good that you want to do something positive tomorrow, you could try writing a list tonight while your feeling ok then maybe just pick one thing to do and give yourself s reward if you can manage it tomorrow :)

    Mimii x

  • That's a good idea Mimii, I've got plenty of things to do I've been putting off,

    so pickin one shouldn't be hard!

    How's your day been and how has your anxiety been recently?

    Has it improved any, or do you just learn ways to cope with it better?

    Holly Xx

  • I joined site mainly because my daughters had depression and anxiety, not too bad myself , few problems but am able to cope :)

    Mimii x

  • Ah I see, you sound like a very supportive mum :)

    Thanks again for replying and it's nice to meet you!

    Holly Xx

  • Nice to meet you too, let us know how you get on with that I list :)

    Mimii x

  • I will do, thanks again! Xxx

  • Just wanted to say hello & welcome :)

    Sorry you've had a rough couple of days. Mimii's idea of a list sounds excellent, giving yourself an achievable target is a good start.

    Good luck :)

    x

  • Thank you Thomson1898, nice to meet you :)

    I will definitely give it a try, and let you know how I get on tomorrow!

    Thanks for the welcome,

    Love, Holly x

  • Hi Holly,

    I know we have talked before on the other site, but thought would say hello again.

    Sorry to hear you are having a rough day, but like you said tomorrow is another day, I try to think of it as a new start each day is new and we can do anything we want.

    I see a counsellor for my anxiety and he has helped me loads, one of the thing's that has helped me was having a worry time in the day. I picked 7;30 at night, so when I was getting stressed out I would say to myself STOP will worry about that at 7;30 tonight. And of course by the time 7;30 came round I would have either forgot about it or just had half an hour worrying but it did not seem as bad by then.

    I found it helped me, so no harm in giving it a go eh?

    Hope you are having a better time now, and don't forget to keep coming on here for support, we are all here to help each other. gardener x

  • Hi there, fancy meeting you here ;)

    That is a good idea, I had an ex-boyfriend and he used to say when I was worrying about stuff in the next millennium 'worry about it when it happens'. In other words, start worrying when it makes sense to start worrying, or worry at a sensible time, which is kinda similar to what your saying.

    It sounds like a good idea, and I'll definitely give it a go!

    I didn't have a great day, but I've had worse so I'll just hope for a better one tomorrow..

    Speak soon gardener, hope ye get a good sleep,

    N.nite, luv Holly x

  • Hi Holly and welcome to the site. This is a great place for anxiety sufferers to let off steam, rant or rave or to ask questions. Always someone here who understands and to listen.

    Bev x

  • Hello Holly & Welcome :-)

    Yes I have to agree , I find also making a list & ticking just one of a day if that is all you can manage , really helps you to start moving forward at the same time as not putting to much pressure on yourself

    Hope you find this site helpful :)

    Love

    whywhy

    xxx

  • Thanks for your warm welcome hypercat and whywhy! :)

    Love Holly Xx

  • Hiya Holly, Cookie here and welcome to the nest

    you will find it nice and cosy and the people are the best,

    we welcome you with open hearts and hope you'll be our friend

    for we know how your feeling and our love to you we send xxx

    Love Cookie xxx

  • Aw hi Cookie, thank you, and I love your little poem, it made me smile! :)

    Hope your well and nice to meet you!

    Thanks again,

    Love, Holly x

  • Hi Holly welcome to the site , hope you have been good today. let us no if you managed to do something small today, :)

    Bonnie

    xxx

  • Hi Bonnie,

    Thanks for the welcome :)

    I managed to go to this dayprogram I go to, I'm ok with that as I'm familiar with it, I'm familiar with the way to get there (it's literally 2busstops), and I'm ok when I'm there, coz I know everybody (I've been there a long time), but its as soon as I leave it, and set foot outside anywhere that's familiar to me, or where there's people I don't know, or even just where there's a group of people I freak..

    And I've been living with this for so long that I do force myself to do things (like going to that day-program), but its just so exhausting to live in a constant state of panic, as I'm sure you can identify with.

    I just wish I could feel at ease and at peace instead of always, 24/7, feeling on edge.

    A friend of mine's in hospital, but I have no idea how to get there, and I've never been there before.

    I feel really guilty as I'd love to go and visit him, and I've been trying to force myself all week, I even looked up how to get there but it's too much, I just can't do it..

    And the worst thing is, he doesn't understand, and probably thinks I just can't be bothered.. I've not even tried explaining to him, as I'm quite embarrassed about it as I see it as a weakness, people think I'm quite 'tough' and strong etc.. so it doesn't quite fit in with my image ;)

    I know this is total nonsense and ridiculous, but its just the way it is in my area, if you show anything that could be seen as 'weak', well its just not a good idea..

    Sorry for my rambling on and I hope you understand coz I know it sounds pretty stupid, but it's just

    the way it is around here..

    Love, Holly x

  • Hi! I know im interrupting but it is not total nonsense at all!! I have lost pretty much all my mates in this area just because i just cannot go out with them! The panic feels too much and my head feels like its gonna explode! I have missed so many of my mates weddings, parties, birthdays, one of which has an engagement do this wknd which im dreading! And i hate it! And the people who you want to tell who dont know what you're going through wont understand, but you will feel so much better if you do tell them!

    Trust me, i have an older and brother and sister who i adore to bits and they kept asking me to do things with them and i just kept finding excuses and saying no and i just found the guilt even harder to live with! And then very emotionally, i told them that i had bad anxiety and how much going out made me panic and even though they still wont understand what you are going through, they did accept it and now when they ask me to go out, they understand if i say no, but i find that i end up saying yes to them sometimes because i can't bear not spending time with them and that sometimes outweighs my panic a little! Like i'd rather have the horrible feeling of panic that DOES subside then feeling the guilt of not spending time with them!!

    I can totally relate to u not visiting you're friend in hospital either, even though you want to and you know you should! Hospitals for me are like the ultimate anxiety and panic triggering buildings for me and the very last place in the world i want to go! My dad went in recently quite suddenly and everyone was up there except me and i felt horrible so in the end my brother came by and i just thought "debs you have to go, this isn't about me it's about my dad" and me and my brother went together! Maybe go up to the hospital with a friend who makes you feel comfortable and in my case, can drive so that you dont have to worry about public transport or flick the priorities in your head and think "right my mate is in hospital. They are not well, they need company, and i am going to give them that!" I know it's easier said than done but the achievement and sense of accomplishment you will feel, will knock your socks off!!! Haha!

    Hope this helps! And again, I am so sorry for interrupting your conversation!

    Love debs x

  • Hey Holly!!

    Welcome to the site, i have only just joined aswell and it does somehow make you feel better that you're not the only person in the world going through what you're going through! I suffer badly from it too and life is a little depressing in my house too but do you know what, there is always someone to talk to here and i find being outside really helps me! Just going for a walk even in the rain is totally refreshing and clears your head and generally makes you feel loads better, even if you do look a bit of an idiot walking in the rain!! Hahahaha x debs

  • Hi Debs, nice to meet you and thanks for both your posts!

    I'd already thought of that, trying to get someone to come with me to see my pal in hospital (he's actually my ex ;) ) ,but you know what it's like, the only person I know that drives is working all week

    and pretty busy, and I don't really want to ask anyone else as it's quite a bustrip,and I wouldn't want to put that on anybody..

    I'll keep thinking if someone to ask and think of other solutions, I might come up with something..

    I know what you mean about being outside as well, it definitely helps!

    I'm quite lucky I live near a park as well, so I can go for a walk and not have to worry about bumping into anyone!

    Welcome to you to the site as well, it's nice to know somebody else has joined at the same time :)

    I joined another forum recently as well, Action on Depression (I'm not even sure what its called, but i's something like that anyway lol), and found it very helpful so far!

    People on it are lovely and very supportive, and like you say, it's good to know you're not alone!

    Love, Holly x

  • That's good you are a member of another group aswell! I always feel so much better when i talk to people! I'm a bit of my own worst enemy really coz I am very anti-social, I don't have mates to go out with anyway really, but I just love being on my own! Especially if im out in the park or something! It's bliss!! Haha!

    I'm a bit phobic of public transport at the mo, so i know what it's like! Do you listen to music or anything while you are on the bus? I just bought this calming cd which is like mood music kind of thing which is great, but i just end up falling asleep all the time! Hahaha!

    Could you ride a bike there at all or is it a bit of a mission? Coz physical activity is definitely meant to distract your brain from panicking and stuff i think!

    Intriguing the pal is your ex!! I'm not very good at the whole guy thing! I get too nervous, ironically!! Hahaha! Let me know what you decide!!

    Lots of love debs x

  • Hiya Debs,

    I'm usually quite a sociable person, its just when I'm not feeling good I start isolating myself, and it really makes things worse, but its what I do unfortunately..

    I can ride a bike, in fact, I had two, but both of em kinda fell apart, they're not usable anymore.. That's ok, I prefer walking anyway..

    That's not necessarily a bad thing, that you enjoy you enjoy your own company,

    in fact I'd say that's a good thing!

    a lot of people really struggle with that and always need to have a partner or have people roundabout them..

    I enjoy my own company too, but only for a certain amount of time, if I spend too much time on my own I end up even more depressed and anxious so that's no good for me..

    We never,really officially split up, tjhis guy and me, it was a bit of a fuckt up relationship lol..

    I've still not decided what to do or how to do it, but I'll keep you posted ;)

    Spk soon,

    Luv, Holly Xx

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