Changed completely

[Wyominganxiety]

I have become such a different person since I started having anxiety not just with the agoraphobia not being able to venture out much but with the way u actually act and see myself it's really negative I used to actually be able to look at myself like wow I'm pretty now all I can do is point out every flaw.. I don't make moves on my fiance because I'm scared of rejection.. It's just crazy I can't even remember the last time I have smiled till my cheeks hurt or laughed without a care. Ugh just frustrated.

[Icanbeathis2016]

I know the feeling. Im so sorry that this has happened. You are not alone. This has changed me tremendously as well.

At first though, when i was going through it i was looking at it like my life has changed for the worst but ive learning and have seen this as it has changed me for the better on the inside. Wow i actually said something positive about this. Which is a piece of a step forward. This process has been so hard for me merely because ive always been such a pessimist and always seen things for the worst and now with this anxiety i am fighting to do something ive never been used to which is try to think positive and not thinking the worst of everything. But outside of that struggle for me i can see how this has changed me for the better. Before all of this i use to be the person that would never be willing to forgive, if youve hurt me or crossed me. I would hold on to anger and never let go. I would hold grudges til the death of me. And now i have decided especially after going through what im going through its not worth it. Its still a process but i can feel within myself that i dont want to be like that anymore. But yes i still fear all the symptoms and things that come along with anxiety and i still have my worries. I can say ive changed socially, i also have become more introverted, a lot of my fun and drive has been stripped away. My usual go getter, strive no matter what motivated self has been fainting and those parts are what saddens me the most and i pray will return because there is so much goals and plans ive always had but seems this anxiety wont allow me to be great.

But i understand your thoughts. I hope,however, you have found a positive change somehow..

I wish us better days ahead..

[Wyominganxiety in reply to Icanbeathis2016]

Yes I'm praying for more positive things to happen, I used to be the go getter the life of the party, now sadly I can't even hang out with out the worry of a panic attack or the fear of being sick, I feel so down and terrified of losing everything I have because of this personality change.. I have been on cylexa for 3 weeks so I know I still have a wats to go and I listen to meditation and positive motivation just need to stop being so hard on myself

[Hidden in reply to Wyominganxiety]

If you are praying then you have to do so to make it seem like you are not begging. U can’t just ask God to cure you because it takes time, there is no cure for anxiety but there are methods and pills that will work! I listen to my daily prayers but I don’t pray because of my illness. God will help u deal with it in the methods u learn, trust me!

[Wyominganxiety]

Thanks, I dk why I'm so terrified he will look at me like wtf are you doing?!!

[Wyominganxiety]

Will do!! Got a head start took some pics wearing his bears jersey lol I'm a steelers fan so ugh the things you do for love haha

[Mpa5524]

I'm 100% positive your fiance won't reject you. Now go get em tiger. Lol. Feel better soon

[Wyominganxiety in reply to Mpa5524]

Lol thank you