Depersonalization-derealization disorder

[Rose1995]

Hi,

I've just found this site and I really need help. I have diagnosed myself with this after loads of research and I've had it for years now. It's got so bad recently I don't know what to do. I've self harmed before as it's got so bad to the point where my body just felt numb and I needed to feel something, anything.

My body is always partly numb, my eyes are constantly blurred as though they're tight and heavy. My head feels so heavy, I feel like I'm completely detached from the world, sometimes I'll be around people and I'll have to take a step back and recoup because it gets so bad. It's ruined my social life, my life and I look at my daughter and cry because it doesn't feel like she's here.

I really need help guys, is anyone going through the same thing? How can I deal with it please.

A.

[HopingCat]

Yes, me for 6 months now. Are you taking any medication?

[Rose1995 in reply to HopingCat]

Nope none, are you? How do you cope with it

[HopingCat in reply to Rose1995]

I was trying everything possible not to be on medication but I finally gave up and started medication yesterday. I hope it helps this hell. I just force myself and ignore as much as possible but it's hard. I try doing every single routine I used to do before this hell hit me and now 6 months later I can function but still with this horror. How long have you had it for?

[Rose1995 in reply to HopingCat]

What medication are you on? I'm from the UK so I heard there's no medication available here

I've had it for coming up to 5 years now and I can't deal with it anymore. It gets worse when I'm stressed, and it makes me stressed so it just keeps getting worse

[HopingCat in reply to Rose1995]

There's no medication for it but if it came from anxiety/panic/depression then you need anxiety medication. I just started Effexor yesterday. I'm willing to try anything at this point

[Rose1995 in reply to HopingCat]

Yes so am I.

I'm going to ask my current physiatrist to be referred to the Maudsley unit as I've heard great things about them

[HopingCat in reply to Rose1995]

You have been dealing with this for 5 years without medication? You have never tried?

[Rose1995 in reply to HopingCat]

Didn't know depersonalisation was even a thing until a couple years ago, and no one I've spoken to has told me that there is any medication available

[HopingCat in reply to Rose1995]

For anxiety yes. If you think this came from anxiety/panic/depression than you can fix it with antidepressant and a benzo

[Rose1995 in reply to HopingCat]

I don't think that's where it originated from no, but I definitely think it's made it worse recently.

Will go to GP thank you!

[HopingCat in reply to Rose1995]

And that's my problem. I don't know where it came unless I had an anxiety issue that I didn't know about and it exploded.

[Rose1995 in reply to HopingCat]

I think mine may have come from recreational drug usage

[HopingCat in reply to Rose1995]

Well I also got this when I was a teen from weed so yea it could be your case. Lots of people get it from drugs

[Rose1995 in reply to HopingCat]

I hope yours gets better, I hope to stay in contact to see how it goes

[Lvictoria81]

Hey I know whay you're going threw. I go threw that on the daily. Its gotten to the point where i want to feel something other then this feeling. My thoughts never shut off and I Google so much which is not good. I've been to doctors and the put me on different meds but nothing seems to work for me. I was on celexa which gave me suicidal thoughts and then Prozac which all I did was cry while on it. I could use a lot of advise and help.

[Rose1995 in reply to Lvictoria81]

I'm so sorry to hear you're going through that, I can truly say I understand. How long have you gone through this for? I'm scared to try medication, but at this point I'm going to try anything because it can't get any worse than this.

I need so much advise & help which is why I came on here. Going to try to get a referral to a specialist unit

[Lvictoria81 in reply to Rose1995]

Ive been going threw this on and off since I was 13 I'm not 25. But revently its been at the worst its ever been for 2 months. My relationship is failimg my kids are sensing this I feel like such a bad mother but I fight everyday to try and be "normal" bit i fail. I know simce ive been on this site I've been feeling better and less alone knowing there are millions like us out there. I'm feelimg grateful for everyone on this site. Its something we need to learn to cope with. Dont be afraid to try medication there are tons that may work I just havent found the right one yet but please I beg of you to see a psycologist while on meds. This is why my meds dont work because I have no one to release these thoughts to that understand me.

[Rose1995 in reply to Lvictoria81]

Yes I've only just found this website and I already feel hopeful knowing that I'm not alone. I'm in exactly the same position with my relationship and my daughter is turning 1& I just want to sort it out before she realises something's wrong.

Thank you so much

[Lvictoria81 in reply to Rose1995]

Yeah i have a 9 and 5 year old so I understand how u feel. Anxiety is just something we need to learn how to cope with. Ive dome so much research about it and its amazing what it can actually do to you. It causes fake symptoms its incredible and scary at the same time.