Sooo discouraged right now :(

I feel so hopeless in managing my anxiety. Every day I wake up hoping it'll be gone. Even though I don't get bad panick attacks every single day like I used too a couple years ago, I struggle with the feeling of accepting what life is like for me now. I'm married, pregnant, and looking for a job. There are a lot of blessings in my life that I'm grateful for, but when I struggle to get through the day sometimes because it all feels unreal. I don't feel like I'm able to focus properly because anxiety is constantly on my mind. I'm afraid of the feeling, it's discouraging. It feels like I'll never be able to be aware of the current moment fully because my mind makes it feel like a dream.

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10 Replies

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  • I feel you. It's hell. Have you tired meditation, yoga, supplements, essential oils, exercise? It might help. I know I started to feel better when I started taking magnesium but it didn't cure it.

  • No, what really helps me is to distract my mind by either going on the internet, talking to my friends and family, or writing my feelings down. I really should try excercising though.

  • It sounds like what you are experiencing is the fear of being fearful. You said in your post, " I struggle with the feeling of accepting what life is like for me now." Every time you add all these fearful thoughts to your day, you make your anxiety worse. Your thoughts are worry thoughts. To change your thoughts try concentrating on what is good in your life. Tell yourself that it's ok to feel the way you feel and don't add more thoughts to this. The more we fight or resist, the worse it gets. Acceptance of what you are feeling and where you are right now is key. You see a miracle happens when you can truly accept what you are feeling is ok without wanting it to go away. If you have had anxiety for a long time your nervous system becomes sensitized. By adding more and more worrying thoughts, this keeps you sensitized. If you can accept how you feel your nervous system will start to get better. I know what I am saying seems hard but it is the only way you will start to feel better.

  • Thanks for replying, I know, I have a hard time accepting my negative feelings, it just feels so terrible and I'm afraid of that feeling, but I guess that's what makes it worse. You're right, I'm gonna try to not let my worries escalate because then it all spirals downhill from there.

  • Think about what you might tell a friend that is going through the same as you. Would you say " Just keep worrying and adding more fearful thoughts to existing fears." I am sure you wouldn't. What you might say is" be kinder to yourself. It doesn't matter that you feel this way. You are not a failure. You are doing the best you can." Start giving yourself the credit for what you do achieve.

    Gillian.

  • Firstly congratulations on your pregnancy this will be a great focus for you. I think a part of improving your anxiety is accepting that it is a part of you and won't necessarily go away fully. Have you identified your triggers and tried working on these? Would recommend counselling and they can help with CBT etc they can also support you when your baby arrives - I found my anxiety started after I had my daughter lots more things to worry about! Finding ways to relax are important - baths, massage, listening to music etc will be good for you and baby x

  • Thank you so much! I'm very worried on how my anxiety can harm the baby, which creates more worry. I talked to my OBGYN yesterday and she wants me to try to take medicine, I've never taken medication for my anxiety. I've also heard stories online that the baby can become addicted to the medicine once he's born, so I'm not too convinced about taking it. I'm gonna try drinking teas instead. I need to improve my anxiety to prevent any pregnancy complications.

  • If you can do without meds then I'd try everything else you can first. Can you talk to a therapist to work through your anxiety triggers? X

  • I would like to get in touch with a therapist soon. As far as triggers, I noticed that my anxiety builds up more in the night time, I think because I had my first anxiety attack during the night right before I went to bed. Also being around crowds gives me anxiety, it makes me feel like nothing around me is really happening.

  • Night time was my worst too. All about becoming more relaxed day to day and try some mindfulness and meditation - have a look on YouTube. Def worth having a therapist - mines great and wish I started sooner x

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