Sick and tired of being sick and tired.

[LexiJaye23]

Hello Anxiety Family...I am completely at my breaking point I just feel as if I cannot go on this way. I so desperately want to live but I don't know if I can continue to live like this! All I can think about is closing out my 20's in July living hell on earth. I'm getting to the point where I am so afraid of dying however, at least I would not be suffering this mess any longer. My symptoms continue to beat me down daily. Constant shortness of breath, chest pain, back pain, sleeplessness, arm pain/tightness, disconnected with reality, and moody with the ones I love. I am often an emotional wreck because I am overly-frustrated. It I could get the old Lexi back I just think. I am even afraid to go and support my best friend for her birthday because I am scared of what will happen to me if I travel. I have worked on losing weight and was decreasing the amount of cigarettes I smoke but I an so overwhelmed I am back up to a pack a day and have resumed drinking sodas. I am such a failure smh. I just have in the back of my mind why should I care I am going to die of a heart attack anyways. The last check-up I had was about three weeks ago and I was 289 lbs down from 306 lbs and I have probably gained it all back because I am so depressed. I had a echocardiogram several weeks ago and I have yet to get the results. They are saying that I need to come in and get my records so I am going tomorrow. I assume that the test results aren't too bad because I haven't heard anything. It would not matter anyway because I will still think I have a heart problem. My left arm down to my hands is actually killing me right now. I was supposed to go in for a sleep study a couple of weeks ago but my insurance would not cover it until I meet a 2,000 deductible so I am going to have to make other arrangements. I am so over going to the er, doctors, and having tests done and all I keep hearing is anxiety. How am I supposed to carry on like this? How am I supposed to raise my daughter when I have all of this negativity attacking me? I almost want them to say hey this is the problem so it can be fixed. I am 29 years old and I feel like I am 70. I am so scared of any and everything. I have pain in my legs I have a blood clot or a pimple on my body its cancer. I just wish I could just shut my brain off. My pcp continues to increase my meds which are doing nothing for me. If I don't get an answer soon I don't know what to do. This breathing techniques are not working ugh I'm just tired. Please somebody help me I need to be better.

[Memes242]

I know how you feel. It's so massively overwhelming. Anxiety drove me literally to the point of insanity, too. All I can do is tell you to hold in there, because I know right now it's beyond difficult to believe but things really do get better. And I promise they will for you too, because I was at a point in my life where I was so overwhelmed with extreme anxiety I just wanted to die. I got over the lowest point in my life. Ever. And all I can say is that one day, if you stay strong and face your anxiety you won't feel like this. I know how you feel. I've been there. It gets better.

[Hidden]

It's so difficult to believe that you can recover from this terrifying and debilitating illness, but you can, there's so many people who have recovered, they are the living proof that anxiety can be overcome. I myself am one of those people, I've been to hell and back with anxiety, I've been scared to death of leaving the house, scared of every symtom or sensation that my over sensitized body produced, scared of my own mind and completely overwhelmed, I never believed the doctors when they repeatedly told me test results were fine, I always believed that I had some underlying condition that everyone was overlooking, convinced I would die, I lost so much. Now I'm recovered, I researched as much info as I could, I realized the only way to get the old me back was to accept everything and stop fighting, I'd been feeding my own fears by reacting badly to the sensations anxiety produced, you can't fight anxiety, you accept it, acceptance disharms your fear, check out "Dr Claire Weekes" you can still buy her books from Amazon, she explains everything you need to know, I know you'll read this and find it hard to accept that you can recover, but believe me, it's true, the sad thing is, people think you have to fight it, but you don't, acceptance is your key, once you truly accept everything anxiety throws then you begin to recover, your just stuck in a fear cycle, your afraid of the fears your mind produces, allow the fear, symptoms, sensations etc to come and go, carry on regardless, don't give it your attention and gradually it will subside, just be patient and allow time to pass, don't be tense and ready to fight, there's no need, please hang in there and please look up " Dr Claire Weekes" you'll begin to understand then. Big hugs, and understanding to you from me xxxx

[Mloanddb]

I know this all to well trust me. The shortness of breath, I'm experiencing that as we speak. Chest pains, pains in my arm legs you name it. I get zaps in my chest left side right side in the middle they are terrifying you literally think you could have a heart attack. Lately my new symptom is this dizziness feeling it makes my eyes hurt & and I sometimes feel like I'm going to pass out. My breast hurt witch puts me into panic for breast cancer. It's always one thing after another. I also get very moody with loved ones because I just don't feel well not like a sick flu feeling but a sick feeling I can't really explain if that makes sense. I was a happy carefree person before this anxiety took over my life.

[Johnnie1234]

Your not the only One Sometimes i do wanna give up its like fighting for your life i always want to go out have fun i buy clothes and say yeah im going to wear this and go out and i never do because my heart is always racing fast its not one day its not it is always it calms down but then comes and goes and chest pains back pain neck pain my body feeling sore like i hit the gym and i really didnt i cant be realx sometimes i could be laying down and feel like i cant breath then i get up and my heart start racing really fast i get shortness of breath alot and thats what i keep thinking aswell ama have heart attack when i feel sympthoms My heart worries me the most been like this for about three months or four been to the docters say im fine went to a heart docter say im fine idk what it is because it doesnt feel like im fine is just crazy feelings . i was so use to running to the ER then i just say to my self im not going anymore because its for nothing they are going to tell me the same things but sometimes i say what if they are missing something .

[Hidden]

Johnnie 1234

Try and remember, the symptoms and sensations of anxiety are unpleasant and frightening, but they are not dangerous, try not to shy away from them, it takes practice but it's worth it, you've had tests, your just over sensitized and frightened, if you get a fast beating heart, so what, just carry on, take a breath and carry on with your day, it will pass, it always does xxx

[LexiJaye23]

Thank you everyone for your advice and kind words. I try to apply all of the advice, suggestions, and encouragement to daily life and I will do well for several hours then I will feel absolutely horrible. I desperately want to exercise because I was told that it helps with anxiety but I am afraid that I will have a heart attack. I just wish there was some way that I could be confident in the fact that I actually have just anxiety. It just throws me for a loop that these symptoms are not caused by a physical condition. I just don't know what it will take to gain peace of mind that I am physically ok. I just had an echo last month even after several ekgs and chest x-rays but I'm still thinking its got to be my heart. The tech who performed my echo says to me "You are too young for this" and I am so embarrassed. Gosh I am just searching for something else to be the issue. UGH I just don't know! Is there any other tests that I should take to assure myself I am ok or will it be a waste of time and money?

[LexiJaye23]

I will give a shot and let you know how I am coming along thank you.

[Funkyfaerie]

Get on YouTube and do a daily session of yoga or qui gong. I find the latter the best as it awakens you. x