No answers

[DebGrandma6]

Im so sorry for anyone who has anxiety issues. I am 61, and this all started when i was 17 years old. Through all these years, after many, many counselors and Doctors i still suffer from these and thats a long time. All i can day is they will not kill you. Dont be hard on yourself. This is who you are, just like any other issue. Anxiety is part of your personality and nothing to be ashamed of or apologize for. Sure, i rarely get out of the house, but when i do, i made it and am proud of myself. Try to relax, and accept that this is you and maybe you can win, maybe you cant, dont beat yourself up because your not like everyone else. You are emotional, you get nervous and sometimes you wont be able to control it. Thats o.k. cause once we start to see that this is who we are, and allow ourselves to be anxious, nervous, and scared then it wont be so scary. Accepting is the biggest part of anxiety. Who cares it will stop, it wont last forever, and you will still be here to talk about it. I hope you all understand what im talking about. I have suffered for 50+ years and if i can just accept who i am, and try to enjoy my life with my panic attacks, then why not!! If there is no cure, then let them happen. When they go away, pat yourself on the back and say, good job, you did great. Then go on with your life.

[Peacewithin1]

Thank You for this post

[Saqqara4]

Thank you for this post. I have been in denial about the fact that I am anxious until recently when I had a panic attack for the first time. My body was trying to tell me that I needed slow down, and I feel much better now that I'm coming to terms with my anxiety.

[DebGrandma6 in reply to Saqqara4]

Your so welcome! I could write a huge book about the ugliness of panic attacks, but i decided that being negative only makes people feel more helpless. Impowering us all to accept anxiety as a part of who we are, just like body types, we are all different, so being positive and understanding who we are,i hope helps everyone to know they are not alone. Thanks again!

[Beevee]

There are no answers to anxiety. People have anxious thoughts and feelings because they have anxiety. If anxiety is not present, there are no anxious thoughts or feelings. People continue to suffer because they spend all their time searching for answers to questions that wouldn't exist if it wasn't for anxiety. They continue to suffer because they are fighting a battle that wouldnt exist if they didn't have anxiety. All they are doing is fighting with themselves and will always be on the losing side.

This is why acceptance works. This is why doing nothing about the symptoms works. Accepting and doing nothing means giving up the struggle to try and change the way you feel. Accepting means allowing yourself to fall into any state and being ok about it. Acceptance means waving the white flag and giving up the fight. There is no fight to be had. There are no answers to the questions which are created by anxiety and just one of the ways in which all that excess energy leaves the body.

Minds and bodies have been exhausted to the point that they can't cope and anxiety/depression is the way the mind and body protects itself from further damage. Isn't the human mind and body great?

Accepting creates the much needed opportunity for the mind and body to recover, to recharge the batteries. Recovery is waiting to happen and will begin when sufferers accept, safe in the knowledge that the symptoms are superficial and completely harmless.

[DebGrandma6]

I want to add, to my friends who suffer from panic attacks. Accepting, is not easy, oh dear Lord, and i mean that literally! Accepting, doesnt mean they will go away, or your free. It means, self talk, deep breathing ( i have done enough to grow a new extra lung lol), finding what works for you, along with accepting. At 61 years old and having my first at 17, i am still working on accepting that this is who i am. This will always be a part of me. At 61, i have learned to distract my mind, use realaxation videos (youtube has good ones),yes deep slow breaths. I can never tell anyone ACCEPTING will be easy. Its hard, but you can learn to lessen the strength and time.Bless all of you who are working to accept. With tears flowing, love yourself, be kind to yourselves, and know that you are not alone ever!!!

[Agora1 in reply to DebGrandma6]

DebGrandma6, no truer words were ever spoken. Beautifully said. x

[Reculver]

Can ditto all of this - I'm 65 now and still here ! x

[Beevee]

Hi DebGrandma. I agree that acceptance is hard. Acceptance to me is not about doing things to avoid the thoughts and feelings such as Self talk, deep breathing, distraction etc. Acceptance is about letting the tiger come and doing absolutely nothing about it. It's not about backing off in case you get bitten by the tiger, it is about drawing its bite, calling its bluff. Anxiety is just a bluff and the only way to find that out is to let it do its worst and pass right through it to the other side continually. By completely surrendering to "it" your brain will figure out that there is no threat and your fight/flight response will not trigger the release of all those chemicals that make you want to run, hide or fight. Techniques to stop feeling anxious may bring temporary relief but it reinforces the message to the brain that the anxiety is a threat. The brain watches your reaction to anxiety and associated symptoms and reacts accordingly. It's a primitive but very effective defence mechanism designed to protect you. If you react fearfully by avoiding etc, it knows to keep you on full alert. If you learn not to react and let the thoughts and feelings go, your fight/flight mechanism will not respond. It's takes time to calm down which is why you continually have to pass through the feelings.

Before I had anxiety, I never bothered with meditation, deep breathing, doing stuff to distract myself so why would I be doing it now? I gave up all techniques and faced the tiger head on. That tiger turned out to be a cuddlly, cute little kitten.