Wow....

[MrsB08]

Well so it goes. ... my husband has now admitted and accepted he's an alcoholic.

He has now spoke to his family and I'm so proud of him.

However it took me to totally break down and ask for divorce before he seeked help...

Mt stress levels have risen to a whole new level and obviously anxiety is tipping me over.

Living with this for 6 years and being mentally abused .I woke up last week and something inside me just said enough !!!

I'm so proud of him. I've supported him always..attended AA meetings with him...took up golf...football ) all of which I hate )....

However now that's people know .all i am getting is " just be strong " "help him" "he needs you ...

What about me ? Or am I completely selfish?

[Lynl]

You are not completely selfish at all, as you said you stayed and didn't leave even with verbal abuse, you need to not make yourself sick with this . He has made the first step and admitted it, and God Bless him ,now to start in recovery, churches have s 12 step that includes the Bible, they tell you to also go to other 12 step Along with it. Hopefully he will find a place to get the help he needs and this marriage may be saved. Sometimes they just have to hit the bottom so they know what they're losing to make that change . Prayers of healing for you both

[Maridmurphy2006 in reply to Lynl]

Hi Mrs Bob

[Hidden]

Hi Mrs B08

No I don't think your being selfish at all, often its the partner who suffers just as much in these circumstances and people get so preoccupied with the sufferers that they forget how difficult it is for those around them, you've obviously been through alot and you deserve support with your own issues too, you've done an amazing thing by supporting your husband throughout his difficulties, if family can't acknowledge or offer you support then I'd suggest you go and see your doctor or other health professionals and explain how your struggling with your own issues, you've been very strong, you need supporting too, hope you will soon find the help you require and feel better soon xxx

[stde]

You cannot feel as if everything is on your shoulders, it is not all your responsibility..

He has made the first step and should make new friends to share with, if he keeps going he will get better, but it may take time for his head to settle...

Maybe You should get support from going to the support branch for AA....thinks it is called Al-anon?

[rome1977]

Hi Laura just st read your post I'm a recovering alcoholic 15 years a day at a time I never achieved that right away I had few 'blips' before that you are not selfish at all.

He's took the first step by accepting he's alcoholic and once anyone accepts something it becomes a little easier.

I hope he keeps attending AA without the fellowship I simply wouldn't be here.

You have been on the journey with him I hope you continue and be strong for each other.

al anon is a great organisation as well as spouses/partners need to recover as well.

I hope your anxiety levels out you seem stronger than you think.

Take care x

[Agora1]

MrsB08, I'm glad your husband admitted he is an alcoholic. A big step for him.

But what about you? Being mentally/emotionally abused is both mentally and physically wearing. No bruises, no marks to show your suffering but it hurts so bad. You are not selfish in wanting and needing some "me" time. Also look into Al-anon meetings for spouses, it will help support you. Take care of yourself. x