This cannot be anxiety

[Icanbeathis2016]

I know I know. I tell myslef, I question my thoughts, I over think. I have my moments of saying it is what it is. You've had these syptoms before so why stress over it. But I'm telling you, i cannot sit here and pretend this shit does not bother me and make me worry and question these doctors and my gp. I'm dealing with a bad appetite, upset stomach, I can tell my digestive tract/GI tract or whatever has to do with your stomach is off because it's like certain things I eat makes my stomach go off. All yesterday after being outside in that sun that drained me all after that my mind my body my thoughts basically I was trapped. I kept feeling anxious the entire rest of the day. After getting home last night it took a while for me to fall asleep but yet again I was awaken by a sudden wave or zap to my brain and my body felt weak. I sat up immediately and I felt like my my brain get a wave of adrenaline I got short of breath my heart started pounding. Then I got up and almost couldn't walk from feeling dizzy. This morning I got up again and my head was so dizzy that as I walked or moved my head in every direction I felt dizzy. Bottom line I could go on and on. All I know is I feel different inside. I hate because I don't feel normal. I can't stop stressing mentally. There is no way this can be anxiety. I'm scared for my next second, minute, hour. I had decided to taper myself down to a low dose of the meds until i stop it all together because I don't believe it is helpful which I've only been on it for 3 weeks but I never wanted to take it in the first place. But the meds claim to not be addiction because it's an anti anxiety med so that's why I decided on tapering myself off. Point is I'm tired of pretending even with myself that I can live like this. 😢😢😢 I want to be strong and be myself for my kids. This cannot be anxiety. Those doctors-I can't begin to say how I truly feel about them right now. I fucking Haye this.

[Devin76oh]

I know this is hard but you have to know this takes time. We have all been where you are and some of us are still there. No one said it would be easy just that it would be worth it. Remember there were great days before all this happened and there will be more.

Youve gone to the doctors and they've cleared you for a number of things. Why don't you believe them? Because you feel the symptoms? This explains the anxiety. You see that there are many people here with the same symptoms so you know what you are experiencing is similar. Try not to worry (easier said than done I know) but it will pass. I saw that beevee responded to one of your posts. You should really take the advise and start to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. It does get better and you are stronger than you think. Prayer helps a lot and try talking to God it does help.

[Icanbeathis2016 in reply to Devin76oh]

You are right. And yes I have begun to look at what beevee has said and just be comfortable with it. And it's many moment throughoutmy day that I do let things be I try to accept it for what it is but it's like when I get a full blown panic attack or even a moderate attack it kinda sets me back. But I can't express enough how seeing others post the same things it makes me realize that I'm not the only one.

[Mandy86]

I'm sorry your having a hard time . I'm not having an easy time myself right now . Something I know though is it took a couple of months of taking my meds for me to feel any benefit . And I've been on them for 6 years now and I still have a hard time every now and again but I know that if I wasn't on the meds it would be worse . There is no total or permanent fix but it does get better and easier . I just read a reply that said "get comfortable with being uncomfortable " and that's totally how I feel . I've been having bad anxiety for the past two months and that is how I've been trying to look at it this time it's just a feeling I know what's going to happen , I know after a period of time it will go away and if I find something else to occupy my mind I lose the thoughts that caused it in the first place . I hope your feeling better soon <3

[Icanbeathis2016 in reply to Mandy86]

Yes I agree. And i do see a little benefit of the meds so that why I'm continue to take it. But I have to keep saying to myself a lot when I'm having symptoms that this is only anxiety. It's really hard though especially for me when I'm such a pessimist and never see the positive about things. My boyfriend said I'm making this harder to get through it with my frame of mind and how I think. And i agree with him but told him I've been this way for years even since a kid and now I'm having to train or condition myslef to changet this is not going to happen over night. But I honestly hope it can change over night because I want to get through this.