Nothing makes sense

To me anxiety has totally changed me. I don't really understand how it can change how my body feels, thinks, every ache and pain I worry sick about, every though I truly believe it. I think the worst about any kind of pain. I'm scared, upset, tired, every emotion rolled into one! I used to just be able to get up and go without a care in the world, and these past years I get worried even walking to the shop or the thought of doing things, even though deep down I really want to. Sometimes I can't even explain what the reason is why I don't want to do things, it's just something in my gut 😢

I'm having cbt but I really don't think this will ever go away, I've had it in the past and just feel like I'm back to square one. 

9 Replies

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  • I understand how you feel. Sometime last September I started having major anxiety, I thought I had a problem with my heart! It felt like it came from no where. I'd had a crappy few years but my life was getting better! I then had digestive issues (which has turned out to be gall stones) but my thoughts went wild. Like you every ache, pain, was potentially life threatening and it's scary. I worried about literally everything and kinda still do. I want so desperately to get better and "be normal" I'm trying hard to ignore my negative thoughts and push through. I think it's a hard challenge but I really want my life back. I also lost interest in everything, leaving the house, getting dressesd was all to much hassel because in my head I was dying and I needed to find a solution to my many health problems. I honestly think it takes a strong mind and being determined, forcing yourself out because staying home changes nothing. If something is going to happen then it will - and driving yourself crazy at home with your own thoughts isn't going to help. I hope you feel better soon. x

  • Thanks for your reply, it's horrible isn't it. I have to go out sometimes, I have children so I have to do school run and maybe local shop, but I just feel like I've lost so much, I'm not bothered about partying or anything, just to be able to go to the park without the bad feeling in my gut would be a start. I do spend a lot of my time thinking about what's going on, which then sends me into panic and feeling so upset.

    Can I ask did you have an opp to remove your gallbladder? I also have gallstones 😢 

    Are you having therapy or anything? 

    Thank you x

  • I'm waiting on my operation, sometime in June. It has caused me so many problems. I honesty believe it kicked started my anxiety, it caused me so many strange symptoms, I was in A@E a lot! To start with they said they were to small to be causing me the issues I was having, which left me diagnosing myself on google. (Bad move) It was a viscous cycle, google is great but I would always read the worst possible outcome and then I would panic! After months of doctors appointments, stays in hospital they finally decided (only last week) they would take them out. It has been horrible, pain in my back, bloating to the point I look pregnant, gas, neck pain. The stress of not knowing sent me mad... I ended up having horrible headaches, so I stated believing I had a brain tumor but a scan cleared that up as it was clear. I have also been referred for CBT but it hasn't started yet. I have four children also, so like you shopping trips are about as adventurous as I get. Partying is really off my radar, meeting with friends I'm just not interested. I'm trying to force myself to do more but every day is a struggle. 

    Take care. x

  • Oh gosh,they are so painful arnt they, I went by ambulance over 6 years ago because I was in agony with them and couldn't breathe, all they said at the time was we think it's gallstones go to your gp, but the pain would come and go so I never bothered until last year when I went for a scan and it was confirmed, I havnt been booked in yet, I've been advised to try and lose a little weight first! 

    You might find therapy really works for you.be proud of yourself when you manage to get out, it is an achievement doesn't matter how small X 

  • I had my gallbladder removed after a year of attacks & it was almost instant relief.  I've known friends with slower recoveries but all agree it's worth it to escape worrying when an attack will hit.

  • We r so identical do u get that feeling of dread in your tummy wen u have a attack I do my tummy does flip flops then the panic and anxiety kicks in god I'm beside myself wen it happens. Every little bit of pain I get I automatically think straight away that I'm dying it's a horrible thing to have battling with yourself ain't good at all its nasty I've got a kidney and urine infection at the minute so my anxiety is through the roof I'm automatically thinking that summats seriously wrong wiv my kidneys or bladder that I'm dying of something life threatening I know it sounds mad but it isn't nice wen it happens at all.

    Take care x

  • Yes it feels like it's doing sumasalts! Aww have you😢 I can imagine your anxiety is so high right now, just try and think this infection will get better. I thought I had a kidney infection last week I was in so much pain, it wasn't that and the doc said maybe abit of gastroenteritis, I didn't believe it though, so still niggling away wondering what the pain was. It's terrible

    Hope your ok x

  • Hi I couldn't of explained the symptoms you have described any better myself this is exactly what I feel like every day at the moment I want to do things and go places but something inmy minds stops me and says no don't do that and then think of everything that could go wrong ! I have bad health anxiety and despite having a loving family I just can't shake these feelings any advice from anyone appreciated hope your all well today 

  • It really is horrible, my mood changed by the minute, I can't help but worry about everything, i worry so much about my health also 😩

    Are you getting any help? X