How do I tell my doctor about my anxiety?

I have had what I think are probably some mental illness issues for about 5 years now. But it is just recently that I have even finally accepted that I think I have serious anxiety issues and it is only because it is really disrupting my life. I can't sleep, I can't eat when I want to, I feel nauseous suddenly in times that are high anxiety (this can be anything - things not so big to other people - and I mean at this point, several times a day). I have breathing weirdness also at these times. Most nights I have to take gravol or night cold medicine to even sleep, which I know is horrible for me - but it takes me hours of lying there to fall asleep at all, and sometimes I can stay up all night (Once I fall asleep, I could sleep all day. I am somehow always tired also?) I get headaches and my body is sore always. I am always always anxious and disheartened and I am at my wit's end because every day is just disrupted and it is getting worse day by day. I am scared it's going to affect my education. I am really emotionally and socially bad. I have an impossible time making friends or speaking to people also. I have vomitted/been suddenly ill from anxiety in these past months, which is really when it has gotten this bad.

I live in Canada. I am only 19. What would I tell my doctor? What might my doctor say? Is there any way I can do this without my parents knowing? I have a good relationship with them but we don't talk about these things, and I don't want them to be disappointed/think I'm weird and whatnot. I really don't know what to do. Would my doctor put me on medication? I am at this horrible point where I think that might be the only option and if it will help I will do anything. Would my Canadian healthcare cover that or would that be different? (I have OHIP, Ontario).

I am not keen on seeing a therapist because I am so socially anxious. I don't know what to do. I am really struggling. I am really stuck and it is really affecting my life.

Thank you in advance.

3 Replies

  • Hey :)

    Bless you , your parents wouldn't be disappointed in you, they would be proud that you found the courage to say something.

    I would write everything down that you are feeling and present it to your doctor. Trust me, your doctor will understand what you are going through.

    As a mum myself to a 16yr daughter I totally understand .

    Do you have a counsellor at college that you can talk too? If you do, I would get an appointment.

    Look into mindfulness, you ask your doctor or look online.

    I do but there are others such as Headspace.

    Try and get into a routine for bedtime. Have a warm bath, read a book, spray some lavender .

    All this will help.

    Most importantly, I would find the courage and talk to your mum. You will be glad you did :)

    Good luck x

  • You could possibly benefit greatly from talking to some other people and getting a lot of worry off your chest, be that a relative or friend or strangers. What you describe is not uncommon for younger people at around your age. You should be careful not to label yourself as mentally ill when really you may be going through circumstances that you can control, perhaps with a little help. Look for self-help groups locally. Also try to work out what you think are the causes. If it's something historical you may benefit from counseling.

    Seems like there's a whole reality you're not talking about, not here so far anyway. Think about your personal situation. How is your education going? Is it particularly difficult right now and are you doing everything you an to stay on track? Are you happy with any of your key relationships? Do you have debt or money worries? What have you got going on to focus your attention outside of yourself? (hobbies/ sports/ fitness/ pet cat or dog, Voluntary work?)

    What is it you would change about your life? A lot of the self help books would take you along that kind of path of self exploration and you really must make time and treat yourself to some constructive introspection and do it regularly. We can be our own best friends and doctors sometimes and as you get to know yourself it becomes easier to talk to others when you need their help.

    I'm not familiar with the Canadian health system but of course many internet sites are trans-national and you don't have to reveal that you are in Canada. You might be able to get further help via the helpline support available from Anxiety UK. This is on the phone or via email or in livechat with a trained volunteer. See

    Other potentially useful helplines may be found at Canada may have an equivalent type of signposting service online if you search 'health helpline Canada' or suchlike.

    I hope you can turn it round. Best of luck,


  • Hello. Re what to tell your Dr, consider writing it down, or even printing your post and showing it to your Dr. I've done this in the past, especially when my throat has been constricted. Makes it difficult to talk.

    If I had a child who was suffering such as you are, I'd want to know. They're your parents, they love you and would probably do anything to help you so please, oh please tell them. Who knows, your symptoms may ease a little if you do. They could accompany you to see your GP. I don't think they would be disappointed in you per se. But they'd probably be sad that you didn't tell them sooner.

    Meds are all well and good, but your anxiety is being caused by something. You need to get to the root cause which is why I advocate seeing a psychologist. You would also benefit from cognitive behavioural therapy. Anxiety is hellish I know, but you can ease the symptoms somewhat. Look to books by Dr Claire Weekes.

    I'm very sorry that you're suffering however let me say that the sooner you get help, the sooner YOU will have control over it rather than the other way round. Please, please tell your folks, print out your post and show your Dr. After all, you have nothing to lose by doing so. I sincerely wish you all the very best.

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