Anxiety depression health anxiety

[Natsteveo]

Hi im new to this so thought id introduce myself my name is natasha im 39 years of age with a husband of 15 years and my daughter is 17...

I lost my precious mum to pancreatic cancer and secondary liver cancer she died in my arms 7 weeks later.half of me went with her. My whole world turned upside down.. Now i have severe depression im taking venlafaxine for it but my main problem is panic,anxiety, and health anxiety.

When i get it i go so hot sweaty wet through my heart pounds, and i shake feel sick or actually am sick, cant keep off the toilet then my health anxiety kicks in keep thinking im getting what my mum had and then i make myself 10 times worse i know its all in my head and im just being silly but when it rears its ugly head it takes control for a while does anyone else suffer with health anxiety xxxx

[Bramwell]

Loads of us all suffer with health anxiety on here Natz - me included.

It's a horrible thing quite often kicked-off by a bereavement like yours. Mine was my father slowly dying over the course of five months.

[Natsteveo in reply to Bramwell]

Awww bramwell sorry to hear that it's a horrible thing to have as we have no control over it do we xx

[cazadoo]

Yes lots of us do. Usually a life event is to blame though not always. Sorry for your loss btw. Things may get easier with time.

[Cwoods]

Yes I do all the time I pray we all get through this together.

[lin62-65ze]

I really feel for you, to lose your Mum in such a way is truly awful. I also lost my Dad to lung cancer, my Mum had a severe stroke, so I do know what it is like to watch someone suffer and die. You must keep reminding yourself that now your Mum is asleep, she is not suffering anymore and she would be unhappy to think that you and your family are now suffering as a result of what you endured.

Your husband must be worried that you are like this, you know need to think positive and relax, time is a great healer. I do hope you manage this x

[Natsteveo]

Thanks everyone ive woken up thismorning trembling from head to toe heart pounding wetvthrough with sweat and that horrible dreaded fear im dying ibknow it sounds really stupid but its a big deal when it happens i hate it this will last for abt a week then subside and i will feel normal again whatever that is??? I hate feeling like this xx

[Pat9]

Oh Natsz I do sympathise.. the dreaded morning thing I have had this all my life I lost my Mum when I was 25 yrs old and just after I got over a breakdown .. and I do know how hard this is, I learnt some techniques on coping with the early morning waking feelings from a book I got way back then and I keep the book by my side even now 40 years on.. it was by Dr Claire Weeks Peace from Nervous Suffering.. without reading that book I doubt I would have been here now and have managed to live the life I have.. although I got myself to a reasonable place I think many of us here if hit with one of lifes big issues we all may crumble.. and find ourselves in a place you never think you will come out from but you will.. you will.. I swear to you if you learn not to place too much importance on the symptoms and move on through the day they will become less and less important and you will find the anxiety etc calms down.. you have to grieve too and that in itself is hard be very gentle with yourself and I wish you well , keep on talking to us here xx

[rainbow01]

Hi Natasha. So sorry to hear that you are going through all this and I can relate to what you have been through. I went through similar feelings when My dad died just over two years ago. It was extremely painful to watch him die and afterwards I developed stomach problems and extreme acid reflux which made me feel sick all the time. These symptoms combined with the knowledge that my dad died of oesophageal cancer convinced me that I was going to go the same way as my dad. This went on for two years, with my symptoms getting worse. My health anxiety reached a high and I had to change it in my head. This is difficult to do, but I started very small by telling myself that I wasn't going to get the same illness as my dad, my symptoms will go away again and most importantly, I wasn't going to die. The more I told myself all this, my brain started to believe it and as a result my symptoms gradually starting to improve. I'm now convinced I developed this condition as a result of the grief and stress I was going through. Also, having held it together throughout my dad's illness, resulted in what I think was a delayed reaction.

Thoughts still pop-in to my head such as 'I'm next for the oesophageal cancer', how will will kids cope without me when I die and such stuff, but I try to change those horrible thoughts as soon as I get them and 'throw them back out'. I'm not saying it's easy, start small and gradually 'chip way at it' and maybe you too will find that your health anxiety improves too. I hope so, nobody should have to suffer like this. Best wishes. Rainbow x.

[Helsbt21]

Hi natz I know you replied to my post recently but I didn't know that your mother died the same exact disease as mine and she died six weeks after diagnoses I was five minutes late after she died , you are suffering the same as me , we sound so similar you should text me or something we might be able to help each other if you want to send me your number or I'll send mine email me [e-mail] xxxx

[Natsteveo]

Wow I'm so overwhelmed with the comments thanks to you all Dr put me on beta blockers yesterday as we'll as my anti depressants they seem to calming me down I didn't realise so many people suffer the same way as me,

Grief affects us in so many ways don't it.

My mum was my best friend my soul mate we went through so much with my violent dad over the years then cancer takes her awAy from me.

It's so unfair I know it's been 7 years ago when I lost her but I miss her so much half of me went with her,

I'm dealing with it the best I can but every now and again when build up of stress erupts I end up feeling like this that I'm dying.

Thank you all so much for your support didn't realise other people go through this as well xxxx

[funkygypsy]

hi natasha how did you get on with your blood sugar tests and thryroid etc did you find you were sleeping a lot and suffering from exhaustion prior to getting the tests done like what made you go and get the tests in the first place?

[Natsteveo in reply to funkygypsy]

Yeh I was sleeping a lot babe and completely exhausted so yeh luckily though my sugars were a worry but I was only pre-diabetic so I had to lose some weight and change my lifestyle I've managed to lose half a stone so far but thanks for asking xxx

[funkygypsy in reply to Natsteveo]

well done for losing the weight im starting to try not having sugar with my drinks easy to do with tea coffee ...not so easy

[luiggi75]

Well I have anxiety really bad my was controlled until my mum passed away in November

Since them it's has gotten so bad but I find talking to my partner helps me slot don't joke every thing in let it out

[Natsteveo in reply to luiggi75]

Hi luiggi75

[Natsteveo]

So sorry to hear you lost your mum I lost mine too it will be 10 years this month and it still feels like yesterday..my anxiety got worse too it will ease over time but u will find a way too cope it's still very raw for you still time will help you heal but you must grieve too