Omg the fear wins again. Now im jobless again. I've handed my notice in!

[celest]

Back to my old fears and I cant go through all that job hunting crap again. Feel so bad, that I didn't ride it through, my boss was a bully, n I only managed 3 momth. My husband says take time out. But I still panic.

The job was on my door step and it was as a sales assistant, n now I wonder what next, so upset that I let the fears win. At first my husband said stick with it, but then eventually I ground him downn and he said hand your notice in then. I had second thoughts right up to the last minutes but still did it.

I even tried to retract it, got a letter today, saying no go.quite upset.

Why has the fear won again. ?

Why cant I listen to people when they give advice, I only see what they mean after I've made my mistakes and think why didn't I listen. .

[Hidden]

Oh celest

I think you need to take a break , you need to get yourself in a better place , give yourself some time to deal with this without the pressure of finding a job & working

You seem to have a very supportive hubby , who isnt putting pressure on you , which is good as I no we can put enough on ourselves

Dont feel guilty , you have anxiety & have nothing to feel guilty about , it causes fear , it makes us run , it happens to us all in one way or another

Please think about you for a few months & give yourself time

Love

whywhy

xxx

[celest in reply to Hidden]

Thank you why why, I wish there was a breaking systrm in my head that says stop before I make these

Stupid decisions. Im still panicking like mad at what ive done. Its not until I finish that I can see the positives. Even time out makes me panic. Too much time to think. Thanks so much for your support why why. You are brilliant. X

[Hidden in reply to celest]

I would say to myself , students take one of these gap years , women take maternity leave to have babies , & so why not say , I am taking time of because I need it to start to feel well , I think that is just as good a reason as the other two

Give having time of a chance ,maybe dont look at the bigger picture as that always causes fear , look at it as I will have this week of from worrying & looking for jobs & so on till you adapt to taking a break , sometimes we need one , our brains need a rest from time to time , try & let yours have one & then later on , I think you will deal with these decisions alot better

xxx

[Jeffju]

This anxiety we have makes life so very difficult for us. I have just started to go back to the supermarket again by myself. I used to look at people going in and think, 'Why can't I do that, I wish I could be like them, what's so hard about it????'...... anxiety is what so damn hard about it. Give yourself a wee break, let your mind heal, take time out and be kind to yourself....... make sure you congratulate yourself on what you do achieve it is so important. You will be surprised at what you do achieve each day. When you are feeling better another job will come along and you will be able to enjoy it. {{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}.

[celest in reply to Jeffju]

Thanks jeffju for your support, Im still panicking. Cant believe that I've done it again. Wel

done for facing your fear. Keep at it. My thing is that I don't like change. I was in my old job for 12 years. I think that I was trying to match that, ive learnt the hard way and I kmow now that I should of given myself time to adapt. It hard to accept what im like now, cos before I left my old job I was a positive confident person. I cant seem to get that back. Ive had therapy, but I'm still the same.

keep up the good work.

Hugs back. Cx

[GreenCS]

Hi Celeste I completely understand. I ended up dropping out of a course that I really wanted to do cos of stupid anxie ty! Its so frustrating isn't it. I agree with whywhy; you need to give yourself some time. Please try not to feel bad about what had happened;it is so hard but you will get there. Also sounds to me like you did well lasting as long as you did; so give yourself some credit for that. Sending you hug xxx