Asking for help

Dear all,

I thought I would share a conversation that I had with a friend over the weekend, and the topic that it brought up. The topic is: Asking for help when you need it.

Around August last year I had been fired from my job and felt over whelmed and unable to cope. I had called my mother to tell her how I felt and had then called my GP. Following that I arranged councelling, and asked the GP for meds to cope, for the first time.

To me, asking for help brings with it a feeling of unable to cope by yourself a sense of failure, and it makes it diffilcult to ask for help, at least for me it does.

As I told my friend this I remembered a time in my childhood when I was around 8. I had moved from England to Holland(where I am from) and had started school in Holland. I had found it very difficult to cope with school and had to go down a grade. My parents had taken me to the GP to ask for help.

After that discussion with my friend I have been feeling a lot more aware of my feelings from that time in my childhood. I have recently been feeling a bit like that 8 year old that went through a tough time. I feel a bit rough, or as if I am struggling for lack of exact word to describe how I feel.

It is ok to ask for help.

lots of love,

Marcus xxx


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10 Replies

  • Yes!! THANK YOU for reminding me that it is ok to askk for help!

  • Thank for sharing this, it's so true..

    I think the times in our childhood when we suffer do come back to us when we have those same fears in a different way as we mature.

    Sue xx

  • Yes it's fine to ask for help, I've only just started. I spoke to a counsellor who asked me to think of an age I see myself as and I suddenly thought 12. This was the time I started to get bullied.

  • Dear Winter09,

    I am very sorry to read that you were bullied in your younger years.

    I hope that the councellor can help you with that.

    warmest regards,


  • Marcus

    You have hit a nerve here with me & thank you for the reminder as well

    I am so good at offering help , but my biggest downfall , is asking for it

    I think for me its the fear of people rejecting me in offering me some help as that is how I would see it & that would hurt, so I avoid asking & the other fear is that they will then hold it against me & maybe want something back in return , that I am not able to give

    Some times in life I have asked a couple of times for help & then been made to feel I have to repay tenfold for that once or twice I have asked , which sometimes I cant do

    This now is one of the biggest reasons I hold back

    Hey Marcus look at you , your blog has made me open up a little

    Special hugs


  • Dear Whywhy,

    It is lovely to see you back.

    lots of hugs,

    Marcus xxx

  • Its lovely to be back to have lots of hugs from you Marcus :-)


  • Dear Whywhy,

    I am sorry to read about your difficulties with regards to asking for help in the past.

    big hug,

    Marcus xxx

  • Yes, it is much definaitely ok to ASK FOR HELP!! wow, if we all had the courage to ask for help more often we would all probaly feel much better! Take Care everyone! xxxx

  • You are absolutely spot on !!! If we could solve all of our problems on our own, we would not need this forum!! The facts are that very rarely is this possible. We can all benefit by sharing our problems and experiences. As the old saying goes ... "... a problem shared is a problem halved", well even if you can't halve your problems, asking for help will certainly stop them escalating!!

    Take care, Mallet-head

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