Struggling to navigate relationships

[Lifesearching]

y’all I’m still struggling with the same issues. I’m getting this feeling I’m being talked about in my new friendships and connections…but the people talking bad could be making me look like a bad person. For example, this new girl has been mentioned me and is in a position of power. Very talented and well connected in the industry I’m trying to make a name in. However I notice our one on one conversations have felt kind of off. She constantly asks super personal questions about my relationship, or obsessively messages me but when I post a milestone moment she disappears. Please someone call me out if I’m seeming self centered or conceited. I’ve been delaying collaborating with her because she has insulted me or undermined me in very subtle ways that are not super obvious to others. I really do not want to collaborate with her, but worried she could potentially ruin my rep by naming me out to be the bad guy.

Lord help me I need Jesus. I just hate that I’m still needing help but I also hate accepting help from mentors who think they can be condescending and rude and I don’t notice. She will flip flop between being nice and then doing something passive aggressive. In this current collaboration I sent her something but she completely switched it up where I’m not really playing a huge role in it anymore if that makes sense? Where now it’s by her rules and I feel like I’m low key being insulted. It’s like the one scene in how the grinch stole Xmas when the mayor gives the grinch a shaver for his gift in front of everyone? Like it’s a “gift” but brings back memories of how he was bullied

this is why I’ve been blocking old friends or even family because I literally don’t know where I stand with them or if they’re going to try something funny. I’m not stuck up or rich or anything it not naive and know some people who claim to be happy for me might not really mean it😵‍💫

[BurdenEase]

That does sound very difficult. It can be difficult to know who to trust but it does sound like your instincts are trying to tell you something but the anxiety is escalating amd taking over. I like how you recognize that the "mentor" is asking your personal questions but also doesn't seem trustworthy with that information. I know that we all have to deal with difficult people that we cannot always cut out of our lives completely. Is there a way that you can decide ahead of time what you are willing and not willing to share? Would that help give you a little bit of control in this situation?

[Lifesearching in reply to BurdenEase]

I’ve just been trying to not talk about my boyfriend if I can avoid it, then is person is in an influencial position and unfortunately I’m the one who is needing help to move up. I don’t know if others around see how their personality really is? I’m just confused because sometimes I think we’re friends and then other times it feels like a back handed insult. I just hate having to work with people I know low key don’t like me

[BurdenEase in reply to Lifesearching]

It is difficult to work with people who don't like or respect you. It makes it even more difficult when you feel that you need them to advance. I will pray that you will find a way to move forward without losing yourself, your values, or your piece of mind.

[Lifesearching in reply to BurdenEase]

Thank you💙🙏🏽🥺it’s going to be a true test of of my bf is as trustworthy as he says he is, if he is he won’t let a snake female friend get between us. If he’s a snake also hopefully he disappears from my life and received karma. I think that’s what worries me most about the fake friends is how much I can trust my bf to stick up for me when I’m not around bcuz the fake friends will probably make some desperate attempts at my man at one point

[Light21]

Life,

You pointed out that she is your mentor, is there anyone else that you could collaborate with?

You said the following: In this current collaboration I sent her something but she completely switched it up where I’m not really playing a huge role in it anymore if that makes sense? Where now it’s by her rules and I feel like I’m low key being insulted.

I probably would feel the same way that you do now if I sent something that I was working on and they just took it over. You are being low key insulted. The only way to fix it is by talking to her. You got this!!

😊

[Lifesearching in reply to Light21]

I’m glad someone understands me, it’s another reason I’ve started to block even long time friends on my social media. I don’t truly know where I stand with them. One moment it really feels like we’re becoming friends then the next moment, I’m like wait did they just insult me or poke a jab at me? I can’t collab with anyone else just yet, because somehow this person has a huge influence in the community I’m in. So others want to see us collaborate but in my mind, I’m like does anyone else see I’m being insulted? I just pray for one friend who just sees me and knows how to protect me or even stick up for me

[Light21 in reply to Lifesearching]

Life,

You said you were blocking long time friends. Is there a way you could talk to them first and just outright ask them how they feel about you? Sometimes just being honest and upfront works. That way you’ll know if they are your friend or not.

That sucks that you still have to collaborate with that lady. I wish you didn’t have to but you’ll get through it. Just do your job and don’t worry about what she thinks. It doesn’t matter what she thinks of you, you are enough.

I pray that you can find that friend that sticks up for you and just loves you for you.

😊🙏🙏