My First Post

[mads4130]

I struggle with severe anxiety— the kind that isn’t just nerves or overthinking, but something that consumes me. I’m a junior in college, and I’ve had anxiety for as long as I can remember, but lately, it’s become unbearable. It feels like my brain is stuck in survival mode, like I’m constantly running from something that isn’t there.

From the moment I wake up, there’s this pit in my stomach— heavy, gnawing, unshakable. Lying still feels impossible. My body won’t let me relax. It follows me through the day, this looming, relentless fear, as if at any moment, something terrible is about to happen. My heart pounds out of nowhere, sometimes 10, 20 times a day. My hands shake. I lose track of time. It’s like my body is screaming that I’m in danger, but there’s no danger— just me, trapped inside my own mind.

I try to stay busy because doing nothing feels unbearable. Basketball, friends, anything to distract myself. But even in those moments, anxiety lingers. I go to therapy twice a week. I take Prozac. But when the anxiety really takes over, I go completely mute. I pace my apartment, back and forth, unable to stop. I call my sister just to hear a voice that reminds me I’m not alone.

I’m not depressed. I love my friends, I stay active, I try to live my life. But this feeling— this overwhelming, suffocating sense of doom— is exhausting. It hijacks my sleep. Some days, I can’t eat at all because my stomach is in knots. Other times, I catch myself shaking just sitting still. Even in class, I can’t just sit and listen— I’m glued to the NYT crossword, just to keep my mind from spiraling.

I feel like I’m drowning in my own thoughts, and no one can see it. People just see how anxious I am, but they don’t get it. I just want to know— is there anyone else out there who feels this way? Am I really alone in this?

[Riley2001]

No. You are not alone. I live with paralyzing depression and anxiety as well. I have to take ativan every day. It helps. It sounds like you are not getting anything out of medications if you are taking them at all. I know when I am feeling anxious I usually worried about something I think may happen in the future or clubbing myself about the past. What do you fear? Failure? Rejection? Disapproval of others? Death?

[TeaOwl]

mads4130: you are absolutely not alone. I’ve experienced this as well. It’s REAL to wake up with the feeling and deal also with physical symptoms like that. Do you feel like the Prozac is working for you still? Do you drink caffeine? I had to recently eliminate caffeine (which is horrific for me). I’ll still have decaf coffee, but I didn’t realize how much caffeine was really doing to me. As a college student, do you have access to the health center? They usually have counseling and I know from going to a therapist long term, that it can be extremely helpful to just get all your emotions out to someone who is accepting and confidential. It’s so good that you’re here sharing what you’re going through. It’s not good to go through this stuff alone- we aren’t meant to💛

[lilymg]

Hi..Have you tried using Magnesium supplements? If your body is low in Magnesium it can cause anxiety, stress, depression and affect your sleep. Magnesium is used and is great for the nervous system, heart health and controlling your stress and anxiety levels. Go online and research Magnesium and speak to your doc about it who may advise you on a Magnesium supplement. It's worth a try.....it worked for me!👍

[Zhangliqun]

Beyond finding out the root cause of this anxiety (do you have a diagnosis?) and treating it, the key thing is to get your mind off of your mind.

By which I mean that as long as you are focused on trying not to feel anxious, the more anxious you will become. Instead, focus on pleasant things, whether current, memories or fantasies about the future.

It's not easy, you will be able to do it only in fits and starts at first and you'll be tempted to give up. But if you stay with it, you'll find that these reveries get slowly but steadily longer. You will still have bad days, but they will become fewer and farther between.

The reverse of the earlier point is also true: the more your mind is OFF your mind in this way, the more the mental/biochemical rut you are in will start to get filled in.

Different things work for different people but just as a few examples on how I do this to maybe jumpstart your own ideas: I like to look at pictures of fall foliage online, or videos of lop-eared rabbits, or sometimes just stroll through hardware stores and absorb the constructive atmosphere of possibilities.

Or even better, find out if there is somebody nearby who needs your help with something (anything). That's the best way to get your mind off your mind...

[Bakar]

Hello. So sorry you are going through this unimaginable difficulties with anxiety. I can identify with it. I’m older but also suffer from debilitating anxiety and depression without any specific reasons. I came across this App called DARE which is specifically for anxiety. There are some free stuff on the app but courses or other stuff cost money. I just tried to use the free stuff. Useful info and techniques. Anyhow, did not work for me probably bc of my treatment resistant depression which causes my anxiety. Check it out if you wish. Thanks.

[Weatherwoman]

Read all these posts & good suggestions. Just thinking & I may be way off base here, but I have suffered for years & years. I, also, found out & it took Way too long, but I was also suffering from hyperthyroidism which was, in part, for the "Anxiety" symptoms that you described. All that I am suggesting is that you get a thorough workup (blood tests of all kinds) to rule out thyroid, & other aliment which could be part of the reasons you are feeling SO poorly. Now, I am in No way blaming my thyroid disease for my Anxiety, but it was part of the reasons my hands shook, my heart papl., had sweats, loss of weight, mind raced, on & on & on. Cannot separate the body from the mind --some affects the other. Hope you get the proper help!