I want to start an online support group for people like me who need to connect

[Existing]

Figured I should just put this out here. I have my own personal needs to contribute in some meaningful way in this world (I have lots of ideas) but I have to move beyond where I'm at to even begin. See if this sounds like something you might benefit from too:I'm extremely isolated, no one to even reach out to for a call or a check in. I feel completely disconnected from the world around me, and because I have no fear, but a longing, for death, this makes isolation an invitation to ending my life.

But, I have my reasons to continue living, and I don't want to make suicide an option.

Existing is not living. If I am to keep breathing, I need to find my way back to a "meaningful life".

A meaningful life requires social connections that are rich and diverse. We require a sense of belonging to this world, if we are ever to feel peace of mind in life.

Social support is the key to everything we need. It motivates us to push beyond our depression,fear, anxiety, dread, etc. it allows us to care and feel cared about. It inspires in us things that alone lie dormant.

It's difficult to make commitments. For anyone, I think. I want something that I can be part of without it being a burden. My biggest fear is that if I created some kind of a weekly support group that no one would show up. And I think thats my biggest fear in life, in general, finding out that no one really does care.

So, before I set myself up for failure, wondering what you think about this, or what kind of things you need, that might also benefit others.

I'm always open to anything. I just need something of purpose in my life, so I'm happy to lead the way.

[yesnoidontknow]

I’m interested in your idea of a support group. I’ve been diagnosed with PTSD, complex, due to my gruesome childhood. Wondering how you’d choose people to be involved and if you’d limit the number of members.

[Xene]

Hi, I’m a bit curious and just wanted to ask you when you’re already on an online support forum where some members might be looking for or have a need for a connection you want to start another one? I’m not surprised however, as over the years this question, suggestion comes up now and again and I don’t know all the outcomes of such independent groups if they do indeed happen. I do know that should you do so HU does not allow a member to solicit other members via this forum or in pm to another website for their own purpose and I’m not saying that you would do that but it’s always good to know.

[kanzler1987]

I am in. Please consider me

[participant05 in reply to kanzler1987]

me too

[Existing in reply to kanzler1987]

I'm still considering this, but things take me a long time with my emotional struggle in life. I'm sure you both understand.

[kanzler1987 in reply to Existing]

Yeah I totally understand. No worries.

[Casivalentina in reply to Existing]

I totally understand, Existing. Thank you

[Dolphin14]

Existing

This is a lovely support group. I hope you came to join us so we can all get to meet you and learn from you

🐬

[Mohammad-341]

Very good idea but I guess details would help how we Will interact

[Gramas]

Yes I would be very interested in something like this. Let me know what you come up with and I'll definitely join.

[Littlecook]

I think this would be brilliant 👏

[Music_paradise]

Looking forward to this!

[Existing]

Im going to one answer here to all, rather than as separate replies. Just seems easier to read and write. I so appreciate all the responses, that was really encouraging

So, as you might see, there are really a range of responses. I want to get the ones who felt like this might be duplication of services, or competing interests, which is not at all what was in my mind. I've been on here for a few years now and this is like my one and only go to for actual support. It's really the one place that I feel safe, but not restricted, and I've never had anything but kind compassionate feedback. And Dolphin, I thought you knew me, to the extent that I'm not new here as you invited me to join in. Maybe I misunderstood what you meant.

And Xene, I pretty much sensed you were not okay with this😅 and that's okay, because I'm thinking of something completely different than HU.

What HU lacks is also what it offers, which for me it offers a safe supportive place to share what's on your mind. And I like how people are pretty willing to ask for what they need, which to me is so refreshing.

But what it doesn't really provide, or even attempt to, is opportunities for deeper connections to develop. I mean, writing out posts and comments to posts is not the same as a conversation. Taking turns writing and responding is a substitute for conversations, but it lacks the spontaneous interaction between people sharing to moment of now. And that's one key element that distinguishes human connection from "interaction". Interaction is closer to transaction than connection.

HU is perfect as it is, and it's gift is that it allows some people the distance they need to be able to actually engage. But I'm talking about something that has life, as in growth, the opportunity to develop and change over time, without restriction or requirement.

*Will start separate response, or maybe a post for the other things people asked about.🙏❤️

[Xene in reply to Existing]

Hi Existing, sorry you confused my curiosity about your suggestion being not ok. I’m pretty easygoing about what goes on, on here about anything unless someone is obnoxiously rude to me and or swears at me. I don’t need to report them I just deal with them in my own way then cross them off my Christmas card list for ever.😂

I can sort of see what you’re suggesting but I thought a closer connection between some members is usually formed on and off the forum in PM’s over time and even then sometimes even that can go wrong for some.🤷‍♀️

The other bit of advice was just a heads up about ADAA and HU not liking members possibly inviting other members to join another similar site in cyberspace no matter how well intentioned but you’d have to talk to the administrators about that. Good Luck.

[Existing in reply to Xene]

Um..

No card for Christmas? 😿

[Xene in reply to Existing]

😂😂😂

[Existing in reply to Xene]

And yeah awhile back I dropped in and someone had just played out my worst nightmare on here about some bad experience with PMs and others said yeah, been happening and how creepy PMs were out of the blue. Well of course I had just gotten done sending a PM to some stranger, 😅 so then I was like yikes! Bye for now HU. But I've had some really traumatic experiences in the last several years like that where I was doing something for some very kind and generous purpose and was somehow accused of something bizarre and everyone looked at me like I was some kind of despicable person who needed to leave. There were a few of those that never made sense or were some mixup that I wasnt even aware of.

[Existing]

Decided a separate post might generate more confusion, so to answer how this would work? Well, I'm a big believer in creating what fits the needs of those interested, not just my own. So, I wanted to hear from you all before I even thought further. And I'm a bit shocked at how many are interested, so we have enough to move this to the side somehow, as to not disrupt HU. Im going to look around here at features I never thought about before to see if I can find a simple way to connect on this here before the step after that. Any ideas on that just to get a ground next would be welcome.

[PeaceNeed in reply to Existing]

For in person spontaneouds discussion what about a zoom group?

[Casivalentina in reply to Existing]

Did anything ever develop for your group idea?

[Existing in reply to Casivalentina]

Still thinking on this need. It's difficult to do anything these days, as I'm sure you understand. But, if I could get this going, it would be not only a huge accomplishment, but a huge support for me too, something I truly lack. HU can only go so far I'm it's ability to connect people. In many ways, that's what we like when we can't do more than a safe anonymous reach out. It's often comforting just to know we are not alone. But, I am too alone, isolated, and too comfortable with the idea of ending my life on my own terms. And because I do feel like I've been prevented from contributing what I still in me to be lived, I desperately need to find ways to increase my connections and create a real relationship with the world. I can't continue living outside the world around me, especially in the stupid ugly community around me. I need to find real support to sustain me. And I know this is what we all need to continue: a reason or purpose that allows us feel like life is worth living.

[Gramas]

I know Facebook has a bunch of real time chats regarding all kinds of subjects including Grief, Depression etc. As far as setting up a real time chat I looked in to it and it seems pretty technical. There’s always messenger programs too if that would work. I have to think about this more to see what I could come up with. In the meantime you can PM me if you think of something or want to brainstorm.