How do I learn from my experiences?

[EricJones]

Every encounter I've been in seems to go well enough. Nobody comes up to me and says anything that I've done is weird. No one seems to notice me. Everyone seems to be in their own zone, but yet I feel they're paying attention to me still and know that I'm paying attention to them. So I feel they can sense my fear and sense that I am off. What is the actual truth or reality behind my thoughts?

[Alpakka123]

For me, knowing something logically can be very different from taking it in and believing it for real.

You now know (logically) that no one is paying attention to you and that people are instead in their own world. The question now becomes how to take that in and believe it. I wrote a post about this not to long ago, which is the link below.

healthunlocked.com/anxiety-...

[designguy]

First, never believe your anxious thoughts and reassure yourself that they are lies whose purpose was to protect yourself but they no longer serve a purpose because you don't need that kind of protection.

Second, start questioning your thinking and challenging your old beliefs and start formulating new, constructive ones that serve you.

Third, start changing the way you talk to yourself and start talking to yourself with love, kindness, reassurance and positivity.

Fourth, cultivate an attitude of gratitude, it will aid in your self-acceptance and openness to others and to life.

It will take time and commitment but it works.

[EricJones in reply to designguy]

but I think they can sense my fear and sense that I am off. What is the actual truth or reality behind my thoughts?

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to EricJones]

Nobody can give you the answer. Those answers can only come from you. That is the work you have to do on yourself, for yourself, by yourself. It's a solo journey called Life and we walk NEXT to those on their OWN paths and hopefully help each other along the way. However, the healing is not linear or anything you can put a deadline on. You'll go back and forth as you start Re-Training your mind to serve you Instead of your mind running your life for you. Tame your Mind/thoughts, and you will gain the freedom you're searching for.

No one is a mind reader, no matter how much you believe it. You cannot read their thoughts any more than they can read yours, correct?

You have to challenge your habits and conditioning. The only way to change is to ACTUALLY CHANGE. You won't find solice or peace by thinking the same way you always have.

If you don't challenge yourself, no one else will either. The growth comes within. Nothing in the external world from people to money to career choices or religion will give you the answers you're desperately seeking.

Be well and put yourself first 🥇 you deserve it

[designguy in reply to EricJones]

The harsh reality is that only you can decide what is truth and reality for you, so you're better off looking inside yourself instead of outside and from others. Also, something a therapist said to me, is ask yourself what are you gaining by continuing to care what others are thinking about you.

If I haven't mentioned before, you might check out The Work by Byron Katie on youtube about how to simply start questioning your thoughts and your beliefs, she also had some good books out.

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to designguy]

Hey buddy 🤗👋 long time no see 🙈 how's it going? Getting ready for a TMS booster before the winter starts. What's new with you?

[designguy in reply to LifeIsThePitts]

Hey Miss P, nice to hear from you, sorry it took a while to respond for some reason i'm not getting HU feeds, good ol technology. I'm doing quite well been very busy doing some design work for a couple of non-profits and also working in my studio with my ceramic art. I'm a featured artist next motn in the gallery so trying to get some pieces ready for it. My wife had hip replacement surgery 4 months ago and its finally starting to feel better so haven't done any traveling but hoping to soon. Glad you're finding the TMS is still helping you.

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to designguy]

TMS continues to be the holy grail of treatment options for me. I'm thankful and grateful for the reliable and consistent results. It's definitely life changing.

Hopefully your wife is gaining her independence back. I know how hard it is to recover from surgery!

Post some pics of your work! I'd love to see some of your designs 😃

Time to start my shift. It's "Friday" today 😉

[Vonus5591]

Just look after self and be happy with yourself

You try hard and don’t need to push yourself further

Enjoy life and life’s experiences

[CLB1125]

just remember that person you think is paying attention to you may be struggling to. I try to put my own fears aside and be kind to others.

[Midori]

You need to learn how to believe in yourself and your own judgement, I think.

Confidence can grow when you start challenging the worries. That is what worked for me, Get angry at your inner voice and tell it to take a hike! You may have to take a few goes, but as you improve, your confidence will also.

Cheers, Midori

[EricJones in reply to Midori]

What do I do about my lack of assessing social interactions well enough? I can't judge them correctly and think bad things will happen to me because I have abnormal problems.

[EricJones in reply to EricJones]

Do you have any helpful feedback on it?

[MaggieSylvie]

Hey Eric, I havent had my computer for a few days, so just read your post. I have to say, this is a string of messages that would be worth keeping. It seems that as more people on this forum have got to know you a little, those with some professional knowledge are coming up with some fantastic advice. Can you print out these replies? I sense a shift in your worries, which, of course, is good.