I was triggered as every evening. I saw that the only concert i want to go to has all the tickets sold. In Bulgaria there's only bad music. And nobody will come to my birthday. My summer as a young adult will be just misery. And mom starts telling sis she's fed up of sis being sick every month and mom wants to remove her tonsils to the doctor that removed my tonsils when i was nine. After less than a month i will be 24. My sister said she doesn't want someone so old to perform a surgery on her. Mom was like "i do it for your own good" and i got pissed off and said "no, you will risk her life because you're sick of us being sick"(i got flashbacks of how i was at my ex's and he broke up with me and started illegal things and didn't want me there because i could had been arrested and mom didn't want me home not to not get sick for my own sake but because "I don't want to take care of you") . Which i understand is valid now. She said she has cysts and shouldn't be stresssed. I'm so scared. I'd rather die myself than have mom or sis die. And she always says she gets sick of stress so i suggested that sis maybe just needs a psychologist not a surgery. I said we all need a psychologist. I can't breathe. I collected my body that wants to collapse but doesn't and went outside to not make it worse for any if us. I feel a birden. Just a few more weeks till i find a job and move out, mom. She told me herself to not seek a job now. Also my degree is useless when im in this state. I feel guilty for her cysts. And i feel dad's guilty too. I won't forgive myself if she gets yk. How can the bad things be happening to us while everyone else is living life?
The curse continues. My mom has breas... - Anxiety and Depre...
The curse continues. My mom has breast cysts and i was a total j3rk
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Against_the_current
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Sorry you are dealing with so much stress in your life. You did not cause your mom's breast cysts. Cysts are usually just benign growths. Has she had them checked out? As far as your living situation, I hope you are soon able to find a job and move out on your own and finally get the peace you need and deserve. I have read most of your other posts and it sounds like your home life is pretty stressful. Don't let your mom guilt you into staying. Your priority should be taking care of yourself and your mental health.
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