Mom wants to come back home after sis makes 18

[No_Longer_Human]

Mom wants to come back home when sis makes 18 after 2 months and im scared. It's ride to tell her "I don't want you here" , she sensed it and felt offended. Also she's giving me money to survive. Im scared the future would be worse because she will come home, sis will break all contacts with me, half-sibling will grow, dad will get more alienated, mom will get older and drink more, i will get older and i still don't have a job or a relationship

[Alpakka123]

Hi,If you're stressed about not having a job, that can be fixed by getting a job. It doesn't need to be an ideal one for you; you can work up to your ideal job. If you're stressed about not being in a relationship, there have been stories of people meeting their future spouses at work. My dad was my mom's boss in a grocery store. That's how they met.

[No_Longer_Human in reply to Alpakka123]

I was going for this internship but i realised it's a fraud against the government, EU and myself. I would litterary help in robbing myself. And i thought like you do but i realised how easily i get overwhelmed. 4 hours outside is my max and even then i start crying. I really wanted a job but i guess im too broken

[Alpakka123 in reply to No_Longer_Human]

I'm not seeing the logic here. Internships have nothing to do with being a fraud against the government, EU, and you. Internships are unpaid positions and that's all there is to it. No one is too broken for a job. If you get overwhelmed easily, then maybe a part-time job would be best. Or maybe volunteer somewhere for now. Volunteers can decide how much of their time they are willing to give. You can start small and work your way up. You don't know what you're capable of if you don't try in the first place. You are getting in your own way. I know it's easier said than done, but you need to work on getting out of your own way.

[secrets22 in reply to Alpakka123]

I'm with you on this, very wise words. It might at first be hard but the best thing for No_Longer_Human to do is the get out there and find any job going, it doesn't help to wallow in misery.

[No_Longer_Human in reply to secrets22]

I just don't know whether to accept a fraud or seek some job for people without degrees

[Alpakka123 in reply to secrets22]

Exactly. It's frustrating, tbh.

[No_Longer_Human in reply to Alpakka123]

This one was funded and paid. I need something that pays. Maybe even enough to rent a place even though i have two appartments. I can't find where to volunteer but im going to the youth centre which is similar and is nice but i really can't stay outside for long without crying. I need to be home and i need to be home alone

[secrets22 in reply to No_Longer_Human]

if you have 2 apartments, why are you not renting one out,?

[Alpakka123 in reply to No_Longer_Human]

What's being outside for long without crying have to do with anything? Lots of us are bending over backwards trying to help you, but we are being met with excuse after excuse.

What would you like us to say? I've asked you before what you want and you said sympathy. You have that. But I sense that you want nothing but sympathy (without us trying to help you). Is this correct? Almost like you're only happy if we say "poor you".

[fauxartist in reply to No_Longer_Human]

I can't help but see that everything seems to be everyone else's fault.... and one thing you could do first off to move forward, is change yourself and how you handle things. Move out, stop taking money from your mom and dad, take responsibility for your own happiness.. no one can make us happy.... we have to do that by our own actions. At some point in life....we have to find our own way.... and to stay stuck in dysfunction and bitterness will do nothing but spiral.... you have posted about the same anger towards your mother, and your disappointment in life for a while now....and no change. What are you doing to make things better in your life, we can't always blame others, we have to take responsibility for our own actions and in-actions. No one hands us everything we want in life.... you have to work for it, and accept disappointments along the way as part of life. We learn to make our own life and our own way. It's hard, and it's messy, but also liberating and rewarding.... try something positive and different...make your own changes.

[Albatrosss]

That’s a lot to deal with, and it’s okay to feel scared. Focus on small steps like building independence and seeking support—it can help ease the stress. You don’t have to have all the answers right now.

[No_Longer_Human in reply to Albatrosss]

Thank you. It's really overwhelming. I couldn't get a job. And rent would be insane. But sending mom back to grandma would be not only heavy on my feelings but also i would have to work as if i have to pay rent. Which i can't do

[Albatrosss in reply to No_Longer_Human]

I understand how overwhelming this situation must be. Balancing family responsibilities and financial pressures is tough. Consider looking for part-time or flexible work, and explore support options like housing assistance. It's okay to ask for help—you don’t have to go through this alone.

& Don't loose hope...!

[No_Longer_Human in reply to Albatrosss]

Thank you. Just in my country and with my family it's hard to get those things

[Albatrosss in reply to No_Longer_Human]

Which country do you belong to?

[No_Longer_Human in reply to Albatrosss]

Bulgaria

[Albatrosss in reply to No_Longer_Human]

Bulgaria's unemployment rate is relatively low, ranging between 5% and 9%, which reflects a healthy job market in general. Keep trying, explore different approaches, and don’t lose hope—opportunities can arise when you least expect them.

[No_Longer_Human in reply to Albatrosss]

Bulgaria looks good on paper but is a fraud. I should have been paid 1380 but boss said she would give me 500 bgn

[Albatrosss in reply to No_Longer_Human]

It sounds incredibly unfair and frustrating. 😔

[No_Longer_Human in reply to Albatrosss]

It is

[Albatrosss in reply to No_Longer_Human]

I just wish you the best of luck and encourage you to never lose hope.

[jjpeabody]

Dear NoLongerHuman, I am assuming you read the book “No Longer Human” a novel by Osamu Dazai, published in 1948. It appears to be about alienation and detachment, something you do not want to emulate. Have you read the book "Psycho-Cybernetics" by Maxwell Maltz. It is a practical approach to setting positive goals and actions. The techniques are used by Olympic athletes, business people, psychologists all over the world.Regarding the "fraudulent" internship job I would accept it as the benefits far out way the pay at this time. Write a summary of your understanding of the job including the pay discrepancy, go see the "boss" in person and ask her if your understanding including future opportunities and pay is correct and ask her to sign it before you accept the job, then take it. Otherwise, I'm sure your parents will step in at some point and assist you in your predicament. You made it through years of college with all its stress and demands. You can do this, you have nothing to lose. Good luck, NoLongerHuman.

[Alpakka123]

Hi again,

I've been thinking some more, and I want to ask you if the following sounds familiar:

you are trying to get your parents to realize that you bleed too. That just because you're different it doesn't mean you don't get hurt/feel emotions just like everyone else. You intentionally stay focused on how uncomfortable your situation is because you want your parents to "wake up" and realize how much it hurts to be you. You want them to validate your feelings. How am I doing? I'll wait for your response before I say any more.