Yesterday I got back from my Psychiatrist's clinic. He's a friend of mine as I have been seeing him on and off since 2007. He knows my history, and the history of my mother and maternal aunt. He was empathetic with me, and tried to convince me to accept and ignore my depression. He told me that all I focus on, and have focused on for years, is "I have depression, I'm suffering!". He told me if I keep shedding all the light only on the depression it will grow and multiply. He told me that my brain 🧠 is really smart, and that I inherited good genes from my mother and father because they are really intelligent people, but if this brain wakes up with nothing to do each morning 🌄 it will take the path of least resistance and bring up the depression and make it bigger because it knows nothing else to do. He told me to get busy, and write ✍ tasks at night before sleep, and execute when I wake up, He told me your thinking needs to be distracted from this depression, you have to ignore this conversation with it, don't get into this dialogue with your brain. Consider it to be a toxic relationship with a toxic girl 👧🏻 just hang up the phone and never give into her trying to call you again, once you pick up that phone 📱 she will manipulate you and make you want to get back to her. He told me don't entertain the thoughts, don't give them a chance to grow and take over your entire life.
I told him some of the thoughts I think about each morning 🌄 he told me how can anyone even live each day with these dark thoughts, you're a hero for surviving this.
He told me these thoughts are only a version of looking at life, they might be true, but not the full truth, the guy singing "what a wonderful world!" is also living in the same world but he is talking about an entirely different perspective.
He told me if you are waiting for depression to go first then do stuff and live your life then the vicious cycle will continue, you'll need to act first and the cycle will break later, you have to give your brain something else to feed upon.
I found his approach convincing and I will try it in the upcoming days.
I bought the new medication 💊 but haven't taken them yet.
Wish me luck 🙏🏻
Written by
SuchiCat
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Thank you for sharing this post. This absolutely makes sense and is something I worked out for myself after I recently experienced a few major traumas. I have been unable to work or socialise since these tragedies took place. Without work or people to distract me, I was left without a sense of purpose and my perception became a dark single track. The only thoughts that occupied my mind was all the bad things that have happened to me from childhood until now, and these thoughts were on a constant loop. I guess CBT is good for getting you to create different perceptions of the same situation, but when consumed with depression, your thoughts go with the perception that makes the most sense. I soon realised that I can either let these thoughts consume me and allow it all to get worse or I can start to untangle, confront and healthily adapt to everything one by one and improve my life any way I can. I can choose to let depression destroy me or I can fight to live my best life. I had to remind myself that it is a choice. I have had to force myself to be patient, understanding and kind to myself and not let the actions of others take away my self-worth. I have learned that time is a great healer and that I have this inate strength within to keep going. Affirmations, breathing exercises, tai-chi, yoga, writing in a journal, watching my favourite shows, reading and taking supplements have all helped me on my road to recovery. Writing lists of tasks at night and tackling them the next day is a fantastic suggestion because it may also help you fall asleep quicker if your mind is focused on achieving these tasks instead of focusing on negatives things. I am going to try this 🙂. Seems like you are working with a great psychiatrist. I hope this approach helps you, Do keep us updated.
This is such a wonderful and wholesome comment, and it encouraged me. I think all the things you said add up to my post and they fit together.
I'm having a similar experience; as I remember things from my childhood then feel sad, I think you're right; time will heal if I stop touching the wound and making it worse.
You are so smart for having worked out all that by yourself, thank you for telling me my Psychiatrist is great, sometimes I forget the value of good people or things in my life.
He was even very empathetic, I was in a bad episode, and I usually don't do that, but I called him on his personal phone because I was having such a hard time, he answered right away and was compassionate, told me to try to wear something and go to a cafe, and meet him once he goes to his clinic.
In 2023 a year before today I also found out I have trauma, I have my best friend to thank for that as she was the one that pointed out that to me.
I think that I should work too and have many people around me to keep me distracted, you're right. I tried CBT before with a very nice doctor and she was my friend and she helped me a lot, specially with my social anxiety; as she helped me make friends when I went back to college, but I also found that depression is strong at times against the new neutral thoughts, it's as if it dismisses them really easy and brush them off then return to the previous perception. I quit, although I still miss my kind doctor.
Thank you, your comment is so nice, I'll keep you updated! 🙂
you survive because that's all your brain and body know....how to survive.....doesn't he think that if it were as easy as turning on and off a switch that we would continuously turn it on and off....nobody wants to deal with depression....no one wants or likes to deal with anxiety....for me....my anxiety and depression have lasted for over 25 years...and has gotten worse in the last 5.....if I could just turn a switch I would....hoping it gets better by the end of the year when I "get out of prison"....but i doubt it.....just do the best that you can
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