I have just left my Mother at the Airport and I am returning home .
We took a taxi and the taxi driver hardly spoke and once we reached the Airport he demanded I pay the fixed fee before he allowed us to take our luggage .
I left Mum at the Airport and I can see how sad , weak and tired she is becoming .
I am greatly saddened to see my Mother struggle and I have asked her to return back to U.K..
As for me I have a Landlord and Tenant paper to sit by the end of June and the search resumes to gain employment.
As I have tried for many years , I am worn out with struggle and anxiety and my genealogy lack of self confidence
Written by
Roukaya
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I think you miss your mother despite knowing she is a narcissist because she is the only emotional connection you have. You sound very lonely.
As I and others have said many times before you need to start making more connections with others then you won't rely on her so much.
This is done by the usual methods of joining a group in which you are interested in ie rambling, church etc. How about a local group for Muslims - I bet there is one.
I do get the impression with you that you find making relationships with others difficult? There is nothing to be ashamed of about that as many do. Some of us never learned good social skills but its never too late to learn them.
I can't remember if you have had any therapy but it might be a good idea? But you must be open to change otherwise nothing will and you will be wasting your time and money.
Please don't give me the blanket response where nothing gets through to you and you find excuses or reasons not to consider any advice and dismiss it out of hand.
Remember nothing will change unless you are open to it. If not then there isn't much any of us can do to help.
If you want to use the site just to vent that's fine but it might be a good idea to say that in your posts? Then we all know where we stand. Take care Roukaya.
Thank you for your reply and I will try not to give a generic response .
It is very true that my Mother is all encompassing and demanding and there is an over dependency from me as I have no one else but my Mother.
I have tried Counselling and I was told there is an intense and over dependency from me since my Father died back in 2018.
I have had Counselling and I was told to give myself a chance and not suffer from such low self confidence and self belief .
I have postponed my visit to my Mother until I sit for a Landlord and Tenant Paper at the end of June
I have joined the local gym , plus a social group in the Midlands and if my budget allows I try to go in solo trips or holidays .
I am under pressure to find employment as I am seeking to move away from the area I live in as I have no friends or connections since 2018.
You have advised to try alternatives and I am doing so
Age seems to be a factor as to whether I get through to interview but with effort I do get interviews.
Thanks for your constructive advice and for highlighting the over dependency I have with my Mother.
Also for no reason at all after seven years my neighbours have stopped talking to me since I put a Ring camera in front of my door as I was suspicious they might have placed a mysterious package infront of my door.
I live in Flat and some residents now evicted have been anti social .
My neighbours who have become hostile for some unknown reason have changed because I put a Ring Camera to prevent anyone else planting a suspicious bag of rubbish in front of my door .
Since the Ring camera installed , there has been no reoccurring rubbish bag infront of my front door .
Had a tear in my skin because its thin. My sciatica is making itself known. And to top it all I have a chest infection and feel awful. Thanks for asking.
I have like moderate to severe sciatica (meaning I think I can manage it pretty well most of the time but every now and then I'll like pop a disc out or smth and then I can't stand up straight for a few wks). I don't think I have any advice you haven't heard before but I empathize.
Mine is caused by spinal stenosis as there are only 5 discs in the back and I have lost at least 2. It presses down on the nerve canal just at your tailbone and apparently a disc can also pop out a bit too catching the nerve. I get it from my back all the way down my leg and into my toes. The pain is awful and makes me cry out.
I can't walk more than a few yards without pain so use a mobile scooter now. Well I am 70 I guess. I am just grateful not to have anything which might kill me even though I wish it would sometimes. Lol
I found what helps me is gentle massage of the affected areas. At night keeping the bad leg straight and resting on the other leg. If it starts jangling when you are out walk really slowly to give it a chance to gently move it.
I'm just snooping. Why would neighbours, good for seven years, have placed rubbish in front of your door? It could be anyone. I would raise the subject with them, in the hopes of keeping good relationships.
I am sorry you had such a surly taxi driver. Thank goodness they are in the minority, but it just makes the sadness of saying goodbye all the worse.
It sounds as if you are both worn out. It is the wrong time of year to be visiting this dreary country. Much better in the summer. Good luck with your paper and I hope it is less of a struggle than in the past.🤗
Since I purchased the two units in Oct 22 , as I have not been able to find employment, this has impacted in my studies.
However, I have a deadline by which to sit one paper by the end of June and one in December.
I have read a few chapters before my Mother arrived in December and I was not able to fully concentrate whilst my Mother was here and I can resume and do four or five chapters a week .
It is to study for Landlord and Tenant and Conveyancing.
I will simply have to start reading as there are no more excuses .
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xx
My fiance left me because of my depression
My mother 
My mother
I want my mother to understand
I want to go home
