nervous for this evening

[Daisy425]

my boyfriend came over and it’s been nice but I’ve also been anxious. This morning was hard but I did eat breakfast. We are both teachers so we’ve been doing work the whole afternoon. In an hour and a half we are grabbing an early dinner. I’m nervous to eat. I don’t want to get food poisoning from the restaurant. Afterwards we are going to a college basketball game. I’m excited to go but it will be crowded. I know getting out and doing this is important and a good distraction from my anxiety. But I’m still anxious. I don’t want to get sick from dinner or get sick at the game.

I no longer have a sore throat, which is great because the doctor last week told me if by the end of this week (tomorrow) I still have a sore throat, then I need to be tested for mono. However, I feel pretty tired today even though I slept in, which is freaking me out. What if I have mono?

also now worried that my boyfriend will throw up or get sick. He feels fine and doesn’t feel sick but now my brain is just jumping to that idea

[Agora1]

Dear Daisy, try concentrating more on the positive things going on in your life

now. You're feeling better, you're boyfriend is with you, you're going out to dinner

and a game afterwards. Don't focus on the "what if's" they take you no where but

Anxietyville. You can and you will have a good evening together. What you think

is what you get. Enjoy dear xx

[Daisy425 in reply to Agora1]

Thank you and I’m so sorry for all these posts. I wish I didn’t live with this fear of throwing up. I keep thinking about if it’s possible to go years and years without vomiting. It is just a big fear of mine. When I first had bad anxiety I would vomit every morning before school. I honestly think I have some ptsd from it.

[Agora1 in reply to Daisy425]

First of all dear, you never have to apologize for posting, no matter how many times.

We are here for each other. I'm so sorry you continue to worry about that fear

however I do understand in how trauma can make it hard to forget. You probably

do have some ptsd from it. Has it ever been addressed with a therapist?

I feel for you but hope you can prove your fear wrong tonite. xx

[Daisy425 in reply to Agora1]

Yes I talk to my therapist all the time about it! We are working on it. I try to tell myself that adults don’t throw up all the time unless there’s something really wrong. I think about my friends and my parents and they haven’t thrown up in years. That isn’t to say it won’t ever happen, but I don’t think it happens as often in adults as my anxiety brain is telling me. I think I’m also afraid when you Throw up it keeps happening, but I also know that isn’t the case.

[Agora1 in reply to Daisy425]

I'm so sorry you are going through this but am glad that you and your

therapist are working on it. Some of our fears are so deep seated that

it takes time to get to the root of the issue. I wish for that day to come

for you soon. xx

[Daisy425 in reply to Agora1]

I also don’t get why I’m nervous that my boyfriend will throw up. I’m so set on the fact that one of us is going to throw up I don’t know why. We’re going out to dinner and I have food poisoning in the back of my mind. I was thinking of getting a BLT and fries because I feel like that wouldn’t cause food poisoning but idk

[Agora1 in reply to Daisy425]

It's not unusual for our own fears to spill over onto someone else that we love.

A BLT and fries sounds delicious and if that would allow you to eat w/o worry,

go for it. Let us know how your evening goes. I hope to hear that you had a

good time without the doubts and fear settling in. xx

[Daisy425 in reply to Agora1]

Thank you for everything 🩷

[Agora1 in reply to Daisy425]

We're always here for you.

Try to enjoy this evening xx

Will be thinking of you.

[Daisy425 in reply to Agora1]

I just had dinner. We ended up splitting appetizers. We had spinach artichoke dip and garlic parm chicken tenders. Not the most bland thing so now I’m anxious. I’m trying to breathe. My head hurts between my eyebrows and I feel slightly dizzy but I think it’s anxiety

[Agora1 in reply to Daisy425]

I hope you made it through okay. Sounds like your muscles were tense

in your neck and shoulders and you probably were feeling the tightness

in your head as well. Let me know dear xx

[Daisy425]

Thank you so much I really appreciate it!

[yhsbirny]

I am not a therapist, and i believe i have talked to you before here suggesting a benzo for anxiety, but it kind of sounds like you have a pervasive fear of everything having to do with social interaction, that manifests itself in this throwing-up thing. I have never had any luck with therapy myself, but it sounds like you need it; just make sure you feel like it is helping you. One thing you could try: have you ever just totally given yourself over to this fear, in the semse of following it through? Think: if I do throw up, what will happen? What is the worst that could happen? How will I deal with it? Will I clean it up if I have to? What's so bad about that? Will I throw up, deal with it, and just walk away....etc? Will it cause me to break down altogether? Maybe do this over several sessions with your therapist. One succcess I did have with a therapist years ago was dealing with a similar phobia by doing this; just push your face right in it, dig your way out, and realize even if it does happen, so what? It may take several sessions or weeks but may be worth a try.

[Hidden in reply to yhsbirny]

Great advice yrsbirny. I concur.

[Daisy425 in reply to yhsbirny]

I do see a therapist and she is wonderful. This is something I plan to work on with her. I’ve also done some work myself on it. I bought a book all about the fear of throwing up, and worked through it. I ask myself those questions and yet I am still fearful

[Bastian7]

Something else to think about (you may already have discussed this with your therapist) is to catch these (irrational) thoughts of getting sick or someone else getting sick as they arise - just nip them in the bud as fast as you can.

You may need to find a technique that works for you. I usually aim to debate with the the thought and use my rational side to undermine my unhelpful 'gut thinking' as it arises. It takes a lot of practice, but it helps me, as I feel a bit more in control - at least it stops the anxiety from taking over completely.