Breaking down

[Easilycrushed]

Ive been trying to be positive and read the bible. Trying to not let the depression take over but the weight of it is too heavy for me to carry alone now. After losing my best friend/boyfriend and now issues with my job. Which i may be fired from any day now. I know i need help. I have a dr appointment this thursday. Im going to tell the dr the truth that i just cant handle this on my own anymore. I need help. Most days i just want to sleep and not feel anything. I just dont care about living anymore. I just want to feel peace

[SwimmerBTC]

I’m pleased that you have an appointment very soon. Be brave and truthful. If you can be honest to yourself you’ll find that you’ve taken a big step in the right direction. Therapy would help; ask for advice, see if your doctor can recommend anyone. You’re on the path to recovery; don’t expect it to suddenly be better overnight as it takes longer, but you will get there. Take care of yourself especially until you’ve seen your doctor.

[Dolphin14]

We all deserve peace.

I'm glad you have an appointment coming up. Being truthful is the only way to begin healing.

Please continue to reach out here for support. We understand how you are feeling

🐬

[Easilycrushed in reply to Dolphin14]

Thank you. For listening and caring. After losing my boyfriend/my best friend, I dont really have any friends or anyone to talk to. Its been hard. Like grieving the loss of a loved one. We were together for 10 months and even tho i am 31, i fell in love for the 1st time. I still love him. I begged for a 2nd chance. I said i would go to therapy or we could go to counseling. Im willing to try and fix things. But he couldn't. He broke up with me because i didnt spend enough time with him. I live with my parents so i come home to them and my dog. I seen him at work and we rode together to and from work. But spending Saturdays together wasnt enough for him. And we didnt communicate honestly. So it all fell apart quickly. I wish i would have listened to my heart and ignored my bitter mother. I didnt bring him home to meet her. He was very upset over that. But i was protecting him. Because i asked her and she said no i dont want to meet him. Hes not good enough for u. That really cut me deep. I asked her why does she pick who i deserve. He wasnt a bad person and thats why i never brough him home. She got defensive and said well do whatever u want if im such a horrible mom. Some days i dispise her. Shes so bitter and negative. Shes the reason why i am depressed. Both my parents hate people and are pessimistic.

I dont know how i lived like this so long😢

[Dolphin14 in reply to Easilycrushed]

I'm sorry that your relationship ended. There is a grieving process to go through with that and it's very painful.

I think I'm trying to protect your boyfriend from your parents he may have started to question his own importance in the relationship? The natural progression of things is that at some point these meetings occur.

At 31 have you thought about moving out? You may find life so much more enjoyable if you change environments.

[Easilycrushed in reply to Dolphin14]

I am working on it. I have my own bills and do all my own laundry. Yet its hard to find a place when i am single and its just my paycheck. I make $1600 a month. Where i live houses to rent are very limited. I talked with my mom about it. She depends on me to always be there with her and i told her its crushing me. I need my own life. When i do she gets defensive and said do whatever u want since u think im a horrible mother. I always thought i would meet a good man who then i marry. Then we get a home together. Support each other. But im 31 and its not happened yet...feels like im losing/missing out because of my moms constant guilt tripping that i need to be with her. I want to help her but i cant. Right now im working on getting help from the doctor with anti depressants and finding somewhere on my own. I think being on my own will do me good. To have peace and learn how to be just me

[Hidden]

You're not alone. I lost my job last week due to anxiety. My anxiety symptoms have gotten worse and my mood is low as well. My world collapsed. Do you have therapy with a psychologist? Do you take any medications?

[Easilycrushed in reply to Hidden]

I havent done therapy. And im not on medications yet. I just know i cant keep going to work under pressure and being around my ex, trying to not fall apart and cry.

[Hidden in reply to Easilycrushed]

talk to your GP about how you feel. I know how you feel, I am also in a hopeless situation

[Easilycrushed in reply to Hidden]

I know it is silly to ask considering what we are talking about but how are you doing?

[Hidden in reply to Easilycrushed]

we are all here to support each other. I have a very low mood after I was fired from work due to anxiety... My anxiety symptoms have gotten worse so it's bad. I think I'm slowly giving up

[Easilycrushed in reply to Hidden]

Have you been to a doctor to talk about how your feeling? Maybe a doctor could help. Its never too late to get help🫂

[Hidden in reply to Easilycrushed]

Yes I have medications and therapy already